Author Topic: make someone laugh  (Read 141040 times)

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GalileoAce

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #435 on: January 19, 2007, 11:11:53 PM »

ozymandias

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #436 on: January 20, 2007, 07:23:46 AM »
+  good one :laugh:

Scrapheap

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #437 on: January 20, 2007, 12:34:09 PM »
Another damn post that got stuck at the bottom of the page....

OK, True story here.

  I was taking the train from Angels Stadium to Lompoc (Surf station) We stop in L.A. and this guy gets on and sits next to me. He's in his late teens/early twenties. He puls out a Gameboy and is soon focused on his game and oblivious to what's going on around him. We pull out of L.A. Station about 5:00 PM  and the sun is still a couple of hours from setting. We come up to the Chatsworth tunnel between San Fernando and Simi Valleys. This tunnel is somewhat long (takes about 5 min to go through) and it's pitch black (except the interior light in the train). This guy finnaly notices that it has gotten dark.
 He looks at me and says: "WOW is it night already dude??"
 I turn to him and say:"No, Gov. Schwarzenneger forgot to pay the Sun bill so they turned it off"



Well?? was that a good one liner or not???

purposefulinsanity

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #438 on: January 20, 2007, 12:36:52 PM »
Just cos it was stuck on the bottom of the page it doesn't mean that people haven't/won't read it-or is this just a sneaky attempt to post whore?  :laugh:

Offline McGiver

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #439 on: January 20, 2007, 01:05:42 PM »
i was complaining to my wife that it has been months since i had gotten any.

she says, "but we had sex right before the baby was born.  remember when we were trying to get him out?"
i said, "yeah, but i didn't cum so it doesn't count."

she responds, " even though i have three kids, i must be a virgin."
Misunderstood.

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #440 on: January 20, 2007, 01:23:41 PM »

she responds, " even though i have three kids, i must be a virgin."

Pwned, like, totally.

:LMAO:
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.

Scrapheap

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #441 on: January 20, 2007, 01:32:30 PM »
Just cos it was stuck on the bottom of the page it doesn't mean that people haven't/won't read it-or is this just a sneaky attempt to post whore?  :laugh:

Damn!!! you figured me out!! >:D :evillaugh:

GalileoAce

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #442 on: January 21, 2007, 06:28:04 AM »
http://youtube.com/watch?v=BcFBbsApsv4

It starts slow...but damn this is funny! XD

Offline Lurk Hurk Gurk

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #443 on: January 21, 2007, 01:26:03 PM »
This article on sanity did it for me, though I don't know if anyone else here has that kind of humor.

Offline McGiver

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #444 on: January 23, 2007, 05:27:27 PM »
Two guys, honoring a pact, go into a vasectomy clinic together. The nurse tells them to fill out several forms, then takes them into a back room, where she tells them to strip. While they are undressing she studies the first guy's forms, then his friend's. When they are both naked, she tells the first guy to get up on the table, lie back, and relax. She carefully examines his cock and balls, complimenting him on the thoroughness of the shave he did at home.

Then, to the astonishment of both guys, she pours some oil into her hands and begins jerking him off. Although the oil is pretty cold, the guy quickly rises to the occasion. Still, he is surprised (he hadn't read about this at alt.support.vasectomy!), and, between moans, asks the nurse, why the handjob? The nurse, without missing a stroke, explains that the treatment is a standard part of the pre-vasectomy preparation, as the tubes are easier to cut if they have been recently cleared.

After a few more seconds of pretty brisk pumping, the guy splatters all over his belly, and the nurse declares him ready for the knife, wiping her hands on a tissue, and tossing the tissue into the trash. Then she tells the second guy to take his friend's place. The second guy, who is already hard from watching what the nurse did to his friend, quickly lifts himself onto the table.

He lies back and closes his eyes. But things are even better than he expected. Instead of a handjob, he gets a long, slow blowjob, the best of his life! When it is finally over, and he is lying exhausted and sweaty on the table, his friend can't help complaining: "How come all I got was cold oil and a handjob, and he gets the best blowjob of his life?" "That," explains the nurse, as she dabs daintily at the corners of her mouth, "is the difference between private care and the National Health Service!"

Misunderstood.

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #445 on: January 24, 2007, 12:09:07 AM »
We all remember what it was like in high school. Most of us were not really thought of as being very cool,  but we have learned many skills since then and made great progress in our lives. It's time to find out how successful you have been at becoming cool. Open this link and follow the instructions, exactly, to see how cool you are, now.



8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.

Offline Callaway

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #446 on: January 24, 2007, 12:29:23 AM »
We all remember what it was like in high school. Most of us were not really thought of as being very cool,  but we have learned many skills since then and made great progress in our lives. It's time to find out how successful you have been at becoming cool. Open this link and follow the instructions, exactly, to see how cool you are, now.



8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

I got, "Nope, you're still a dork."   ;)

Offline El

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #447 on: January 24, 2007, 07:05:58 AM »
I got "Wow, you're the coolest person on earth!"
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

GalileoAce

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #448 on: January 24, 2007, 07:11:20 AM »
Really? I wish I was cool :(

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: make someone laugh
« Reply #449 on: January 24, 2007, 07:32:12 AM »
Really? I wish I was cool :(

Yeah, me, too. That mean old test doesn't even let me have much of a chance, because I'm so uncool. I know I can be cooler than this.
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.