Additions to the "Poopie List".
Richard Simmons Poopie- You poopie so much you lose 30 pounds.
Corn Poopie- Self Explanatory!
Liquid Poopie- The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt and splatters all over the toilet, and at the same time chronically burns your tender poop chute.
Mexican Food Poopie- It smells so bad the room is condemned.
Fisherman's Bobber Poopie- That's the kind where you're in the public rest-room, and there are two people waiting for your stall. You poopie and flush two times, but several golf ball-sized pieces are still floating on the water..
The VanGough Poopie- That's where after you poopie, you are shocked to see all the different colors in your poopie, and try to figure out what you ate to do it again.
The Show-and-Tell Poopie- You're so impressed with your own poopie, you leave it in the bowl so all your friends can appreciate it too.
The Wipers Nightmare- That's the kind that breaks off too soon, so half falls in to the bowl and half stays hanging.
Paralyzing Poopie- When you're sitting poopie-ing so long your legs fall asleep.
He Just Poopied, Poopie- When you get done poopie-ing, you put your shorts back on and go out in public with those identifying bright red pressure circles on the back of your legs for all to see.
The "What Crawled Up Your Butt & Died?" Poopie- Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.
The Snake Charmer Poopie- A long skinny poopie which has managed to coil itself into a frightening position - usually harmless.
The Ritual Poopie- This poopie occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper.
The Ranger Poopie- A poopie which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.
The Porridge Poopie- The type that comes out like toothpaste, and justkeeps on coming. You have two choices: 1) Flush and keep going. 2) Risk it piling up to your crack while you sit there helpless.
The Peek-A-Boo Poopie- Now you see it, now you don't! This poopie is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.
The Mood Enhancer- This poopie occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby allowing you to be your old self again.
The "I Think I'm A Bunny" Poopie- When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.
The "I'm Going To Chew My Food Better" Poopie- When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of your poop shoot on the way out in the morning.
The Crowd Pleaser- This poopie is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone before flushing.
The Cliffhanger- Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop off, because if you wipe now it's going to smear all over the place.
The Terminator- You poopie so hard you fall off the toilet.
The Pool Poopie- Usually performed by younger children. It's too much fun in the pool so why get out? Makes a great floatie toy afterwards!
Lost Poopie- That's when there's a poopie in the urinal.
