i seem to fail every time i manage to find someone who could possibly become a friend. and it's physically exhausting. so right now i don't have the energy to try again, because the chances are so high that i'll fail again, and it's just draining.
You fail because you go in with a negative attitude. Go in with a positive one. Seriously aspies can succeed if they try. You just have to make the effort in life, rather than hiding behind a quilt of psychological labels. Move forward.
i didn't go in with a negative attitude. when i was at my lowest i didn't try at all, it was when i was better that i tried it. and this was before i even knew i had AS, so i didn't have a negative attitude due to that. i have a negative attitude now, yes. because there are only so many times i can go into something hoping for the best, and continuously get the worst.
Ok, you go wrong in places. If you dont mind me asking, how do you go wrong? What tends to screw up? There must be some sort of grouping/ social in your uni that you will fit into somehow.
going out mainly. in order to sustain any kind of friendship before i've always had to go out with them, to the cinema, trafford centre, into town etc etc, and i physically cant do that as much as they seem to require it - it's exhausting and i always end up with headache when i get home. yet if i don't keep on seeing them at least every few days, we drift apart. i'm also not funny or interesting to talk to, which is what most people seem to want. and there are practical reasons whichmake it difficult as well - disorientation etc
Going out can be a bummer, but there is nothing to stop you meeting friends at different places to the city centre, for example your house, local pub, and so on. I would suggest go and live in a much smaller city (and therefore one thats easier to go out in), obviously that is impractical though. As for being intresting to talk to, normally thats a fairly easy one to correct, you need to read into lots of different areas, even if its just a passing glance at the news and a few facts on whatever sports. In other words learn small talk. Being funny is harder, try reading some satire or watching some comedy shows, it may improve your wit a little, but it wont make you a comedian. Really you do need to join some societies at your uni, no matter how hard you find it. The passing of time will make it more comfortable and palitable to do, once you get the swing of the social game a little.
