Wondering when I'm going to start feeling peevish like I normally do at this time of year. Then again, I'm hoping I don't, so far so good! I could do without it!
I hope you manage not to this year. Is there any reason why this time of year always does it to you do you know?
This is the time, 11years ago that I had the big blow up with my mother and sister. Plus, I'm sure change of seasons and the stresses of a new school year don't help either.
BUT, it's been 11 years since the blow up and somehow I feel that I have moved beyond the "drama" of that day. Amber has done well in school and has gotten better with her trichotillomania and also her maturity levels have gotten better over the years. Plus, I think I have learned to "let go" of things that are NOT important. My family problem is NO longer my problem, I have a wonderful wife and daughter, I have a good career as a nurse and as a stay home dad and househusband. If my biological family wants to swim in the "septic tank", thats their choice, I don't have to swim there with them.
Last year at this time was stressful in that Amber got pneumonia, I got sicker than hell, she started her first year of high school, we were having some major renovations done to our house. Plus, I actually ran into a bully from my childhood, who made my life a living hell, and that unleashed a lot of dark thoughts about my past.
So when Vivi made her comment about my mother (see above) I had reached the snapping point and I said what I said, then McJ piled on with his "peevishness". So I went ballistic and you know what happened after that. Last year just seemed to be one thing piled upon another and I won't go into detail since this is the wrong forum for that. I did make numerous entries in my fractalus journal about these things. Maybe I got it out of my system or at least put it out in the open for a better perspective. I got some interesting feed back on Fractalus!
Maybe that was it.................I got a "wake up call" and realized that it was time to stop letting things of the past influence the present. I always prided myself on NOT letting things of the past control my life in the present. Obviously, I hadn't succeeded as well as I thought or as I had wished.
I just seem to be in a better place this year, than last year. Man, I just realized I said more than I intended to.