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Author Topic: Interrogate PMS Elle!  (Read 92795 times)

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Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1260 on: August 04, 2008, 08:31:17 AM »
My fingers have mouths?
You'd know better than I- they're YOUR fingers!

It is a percentages game.
I have picked up this way a looooonnnggg time ago. I had terrible luck with women but was not overly concerned with quality and happy to increase my odds any way I could.
God some of them were hideous......ugh!  :-\
A two at ten and a ten at... six?

I've done this too, but stopped a few years ago.  If I really, really wanted a fuck, I could hit the clubs again and pick up somebody, but it's just not worth it to me.
What part of it makes it not worth it?
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

Offline Peter

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1261 on: August 04, 2008, 08:45:31 AM »
I've done this too, but stopped a few years ago.  If I really, really wanted a fuck, I could hit the clubs again and pick up somebody, but it's just not worth it to me.
What part of it makes it not worth it?

1.  Clubs around here are loud, crowded places with sticky floors, entrance fees, frisking, unfriendly staff and belligerent customers.

2.  Girls that look quite attractive in dark clubs and with the assistance of alcohol generally turn out to be complete mingers in the harsh light of day and sobriety.

3.  After a while, you start bumping into people you've shagged before, which is rather awkward.

4.  It's much simpler to just have a wank and forget about it.  That way, there's no bouncers, boyfriends, STD's, pregnancies or walking 20km because I missed the last bus out of town and am too cheap to get a taxi.
Quote
14:10 - Moarskrillex42: She said something about knowing why I wanted to move to Glasgow when she came in. She plopped down on my bed and told me to go ahead and open it for her.

14:11 - Peter5930: So, she thought I was your lover and that I was sending you a box full of sex toys, and that you wanted to move to Glasgow to be with me?

Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1262 on: August 04, 2008, 08:49:11 AM »
Fair enough.   :laugh:
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

Offline Al Swearegen

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1263 on: August 04, 2008, 09:15:58 AM »

It is a percentages game.
I have picked up this way a looooonnnggg time ago. I had terrible luck with women but was not overly concerned with quality and happy to increase my odds any way I could.
God some of them were hideous......ugh!  :-\
A two at ten and a ten at... six?


Very.....errr.......generous percentages. This is a fugly Autistic socially retarded male trying to pick up women....(maybe divide the percentage by four)
I2 today is not i2 of yesteryear. It is a knitting circle. Those that participate be they nice or asshats know their place and the price to be there. Odeon is the overlord

.Benevolent if you toe the line.

Think it is I2 of old? Even Odeon is not so delusional as to think otherwise. He may on occasionally pretend otherwise but his base is that knitting circle.

Censoring/banning/restricting/moderating myself, Calanadale & Scrapheap were all not his finest moments.

How to apologise to Scrap

Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1264 on: August 04, 2008, 10:56:39 AM »

It is a percentages game.
I have picked up this way a looooonnnggg time ago. I had terrible luck with women but was not overly concerned with quality and happy to increase my odds any way I could.
God some of them were hideous......ugh!  :-\
A two at ten and a ten at... six?


Very.....errr.......generous percentages. This is a fugly Autistic socially retarded male trying to pick up women....(maybe divide the percentage by four)
ouch.   :laugh:
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

thepeaguy

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1265 on: August 11, 2008, 11:50:38 AM »
My precious...

ozymandias

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1266 on: August 11, 2008, 04:14:25 PM »
There was a young lady from Mass.
Who loved to go shaking her ass.
With clothes a bit slutty
She wriggled her butty
She said, NO CONDOMS, NO SEX, I'm not nutty!

(For the non US members Mass. is short for Massachusetts.)

Offline enronh

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1267 on: August 11, 2008, 04:17:30 PM »
There once was a plumber from Lea
Who was plumbing PMS Ellie by the sea
She said "Stop your plumbing
I think someones coming"
Said the plumber, still plumbing "It's me!

Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1268 on: August 11, 2008, 06:39:34 PM »
My precious...
...only behind the assumed identity of her first ex-boyfriend, who had gone on Intensity to stalk and potentially win her back while under an assumed identity, could ThePeaGuy profess his love to the sweet and lovely Serissa, in hopes of winning her calloused little heart.

There was a young lady from Mass.
Who loved to go shaking her ass.
With clothes a bit slutty
She wriggled her butty
She said, NO CONDOMS, NO SEX, I'm not nutty!

(For the non US members Mass. is short for Massachusetts.)
There once was a plumber from Lea
Who was plumbing PMS Ellie by the sea
She said "Stop your plumbing
I think someones coming"
Said the plumber, still plumbing "It's me!
Look, just because my standards USED to be insanely low, and just because every guy who's had his cock in me was a writer, and I have professed myself to be a bit of a nympho, does NOT mean that you can win your way into my pants by writing me poetry.

I'm not into romantic shit like that.   :orly:
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

Offline Alex179

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1269 on: August 11, 2008, 06:45:57 PM »
So, how would someone go about getting the opportunity to bang you silly?   Now that we know poetry doesn't really work on you anymore, that is.
:P   Internets are super serious.

Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1270 on: August 11, 2008, 06:48:17 PM »
So, how would someone go about getting the opportunity to bang you silly?   Now that we know poetry doesn't really work on you anymore, that is.
Romance me with grandiose promises that you aren't going to turn out to be a total douchebag?
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

Offline Alex179

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1271 on: August 11, 2008, 06:51:23 PM »
So, how would someone go about getting the opportunity to bang you silly?   Now that we know poetry doesn't really work on you anymore, that is.
Romance me with grandiose promises that you aren't going to turn out to be a total douchebag?
What are your qualifications for being a total douchebag, so one could know what avoiding such status entails in advance?
:P   Internets are super serious.

ozymandias

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1272 on: August 11, 2008, 06:52:20 PM »
My precious...
...only behind the assumed identity of her first ex-boyfriend, who had gone on Intensity to stalk and potentially win her back while under an assumed identity, could ThePeaGuy profess his love to the sweet and lovely Serissa, in hopes of winning her calloused little heart.

There was a young lady from Mass.
Who loved to go shaking her ass.
With clothes a bit slutty
She wriggled her butty
She said, NO CONDOMS, NO SEX, I'm not nutty!

(For the non US members Mass. is short for Massachusetts.)
There once was a plumber from Lea
Who was plumbing PMS Ellie by the sea
She said "Stop your plumbing
I think someones coming"
Said the plumber, still plumbing "It's me!
Look, just because my standards USED to be insanely low, and just because every guy who's had his cock in me was a writer, and I have professed myself to be a bit of a nympho, does NOT mean that you can win your way into my pants by writing me poetry.

I'm not into romantic shit like that.   :orly:

Picky picky, I came up with that while sitting in the car for an hour and a half drive from Kennebunk Maine to my  home with nothing to read and my wife doing the driving.   :orly:
« Last Edit: August 11, 2008, 06:54:57 PM by ozymandias »

Offline El

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1273 on: August 11, 2008, 08:04:10 PM »
Picky picky, I came up with that while sitting in the car for an hour and a half drive from Kennebunk Maine to my  home with nothing to read and my wife doing the driving.   :orly:
You should have been talking dirty to your wife, you slut.  :P
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.

Offline Alex179

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Re: Interrogate PMS Elle!
« Reply #1274 on: August 11, 2008, 08:18:40 PM »
Picky picky, I came up with that while sitting in the car for an hour and a half drive from Kennebunk Maine to my  home with nothing to read and my wife doing the driving.   :orly:
You should have been talking dirty to your wife, you slut.  :P
He thinks about you even when he is riding in the car with his wife, what does that say?
:P   Internets are super serious.