Ask Eclair anything.

[The_P]

Okay, I need some advice here with dating, seeing as you have had a fuck (excuse the pun) load of guy experience throughout your youth.

I like video games, I like anime, I don't belch or fart very often, I like some music, I don't like spontanity much, I hate cocky women, I am quite a placid person, occasionally a good listener to people's issues, I don't go out very often, I'm not into sports, I work out when I'm in the mood, I am not very good at making anecdotes in public to lighten the mood, I am unemployed.

Feel free to help, providing that it doesn't result in me being somebody I am clearly not.

Unfortunately, no, I didn't have loads of guy experience in my youth...I suffered out and supressed my desires until I was 28 years old...and you may have to also.  But you may learn a lot by observing throughout that time.

Failing that, I can always resort to being some mad scientist.

28, huh? Loooonnggg fucking wait.

But obviously I made up for lost time quickly!
How old are you?

Twenty-four and my social life is zero.

But I am teh funnah -- occasionally.

[McGiver]

observing.

that was the key to her advice.
just pay attention and people watch.

if you want a girlfriend, watch how couples interact with each other.  preferably couples who are still at the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

[The_P]

observing.

that was the key to her advice.
just pay attention and people watch.

if you want a girlfriend, watch how couples interact with each other.  preferably couples who are still at the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

Yo, Daddy Cool, is your name Eclair by any chance?

No, don't think so. Now run along, you fucking Jew.

[Eclair]

Okay, I need some advice here with dating, seeing as you have had a fuck (excuse the pun) load of guy experience throughout your youth.

I like video games, I like anime, I don't belch or fart very often, I like some music, I don't like spontanity much, I hate cocky women, I am quite a placid person, occasionally a good listener to people's issues, I don't go out very often, I'm not into sports, I work out when I'm in the mood, I am not very good at making anecdotes in public to lighten the mood, I am unemployed.

Feel free to help, providing that it doesn't result in me being somebody I am clearly not.

Unfortunately, no, I didn't have loads of guy experience in my youth...I suffered out and supressed my desires until I was 28 years old...and you may have to also.  But you may learn a lot by observing throughout that time.

Failing that, I can always resort to being some mad scientist.

28, huh? Loooonnggg fucking wait.

But obviously I made up for lost time quickly!
How old are you?

Twenty-four and my social life is zero.

But I am teh funnah -- occasionally.

When I'm social I go hard core for a whole couple of days, then that's it for me for a month at least.
If you have no social life, I can't suggest much.  Maybe if you tell me where you have failed I can see a solution?

[Eclair]

observing.

that was the key to her advice.
just pay attention and people watch.

if you want a girlfriend, watch how couples interact with each other.  preferably couples who are still at the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

Yo, Daddy Cool, is your name Eclair by any chance?

No, don't think so. Now run along, you fucking Jew.

Ouch, McJ...want me to rub some cream into your ass?

[McGiver]

observing.

that was the key to her advice.
just pay attention and people watch.

if you want a girlfriend, watch how couples interact with each other.  preferably couples who are still at the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

Yo, Daddy Cool, is your name Eclair by any chance?

No, don't think so. Now run along, you fucking Jew.

Ouch, McJ...want me to rub some cream into your ass?

that's ok.

:slinks away, head down, tail between his legs:

[The_P]

Okay, I need some advice here with dating, seeing as you have had a fuck (excuse the pun) load of guy experience throughout your youth.

I like video games, I like anime, I don't belch or fart very often, I like some music, I don't like spontanity much, I hate cocky women, I am quite a placid person, occasionally a good listener to people's issues, I don't go out very often, I'm not into sports, I work out when I'm in the mood, I am not very good at making anecdotes in public to lighten the mood, I am unemployed.

Feel free to help, providing that it doesn't result in me being somebody I am clearly not.

Unfortunately, no, I didn't have loads of guy experience in my youth...I suffered out and supressed my desires until I was 28 years old...and you may have to also.  But you may learn a lot by observing throughout that time.

Failing that, I can always resort to being some mad scientist.

28, huh? Loooonnggg fucking wait.

But obviously I made up for lost time quickly!
How old are you?

Twenty-four and my social life is zero.

But I am teh funnah -- occasionally.

When I'm social I go hard core for a whole couple of days, then that's it for me for a month at least.
If you have no social life, I can't suggest much.  Maybe if you tell me where you have failed I can see a solution?

Well, I have social skills, it's just that I have no-one else to hang around with me to give me the incentive to go out and socialise and such, apart from Iceman and Vivi occasionally. I tried being friendly with people at college, eight years ago, but they all thought I was one weird fucker.

I was invited to go out clubbing once, but I loathe the experience.

[Eclair]

observing.

that was the key to her advice.
just pay attention and people watch.

if you want a girlfriend, watch how couples interact with each other.  preferably couples who are still at the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

Yo, Daddy Cool, is your name Eclair by any chance?

No, don't think so. Now run along, you fucking Jew.

Ouch, McJ...want me to rub some cream into your ass?

that's ok.

:slinks away, head down, tail between his legs:

Yes, if I rub cream on your ass, my fingers may slip elsewhere...

[SovaNu]

was not. Kiefer is the überbastard. Donald is a puppydog.

didn't you see him playing the bad guy in that one movie?

what movie. Kiefer pulls off the bad guy the best. Donald is a badass too but not like Kiefer.

[Eclair]

Nazi...how do you mean weird?

[The_P]

Nazi...how do you mean weird?

Because I was quiet and didn't act like a tosser, I expect.

[Eclair]

Nazi...how do you mean weird?

Because I was quiet and didn't act like a tosser, I expect.

Probably heaps of girls liked you, you just didn't know it.  That's one thing I found out years later.  Lots of guys had a crush on me and I was absolutely oblivious to it.

[Eclair]

Nazi...how do you mean weird?

Because I was quiet and didn't act like a tosser, I expect.

God you are sneaky when you change names, I thought you were a newbie or a old returner or something.
Sneaky, sneaky, sneaky.

[Calandale]

was not. Kiefer is the überbastard. Donald is a puppydog.

didn't you see him playing the bad guy in that one movie?

Donald Sutherland was The Bad Guy in every fucking
movie he was in. He was great.

[Calandale]

Unfortunately, no, I didn't have loads of guy experience in my youth...I suffered out and supressed my desires until I was 28 years old...and you may have to also.  But you may learn a lot by observing throughout that time.

Now, this is a shocker. I'm not even sure what to
ask, but I want to know more. Mainly what could
allow an attractive female to remain chaste for so
long.