Graphic Self-Injury Video and Rant...

[Hannah]

Recently I’ve felt like I’ve not had the energy to do nothing, and when I do get the energy to do something it’s injurious to me...in some way shape or form, be it Self-Injuring, taking phentermine etc. I’ve been banned permanently from Sweet Addie. I really tried to make it work, I tried my best to keep within my own thread. One night whilst high on phen I posted a long rant about my sticky cup of coffee...I’m sure you all remember that post. Jacobs took this as an chance to ban me...for what going outside of my allotted thread once because I forgot about it?! You’re banning me over this post?!!! It didn’t make any sense, I don’t hold it against Jacobs or Charlie because its there forum and they can do whatever they want to do, and if they so see fit to have me permanently locked out of SA then so be it...

hi guys I don’t know what to say. I know there are a lot of emotions when it comes to Hannah. I really think we have tried a lot directly and indirectly. I just wanted to let you know that I have considered a lot of people's thoughts on having Hannah on the board and I no longer feel like it can be worked out and be a place where Hannah can get some help without some sort of issues. there is so much more to it and I am really unsure how to express it to satisfy everyone's concerns. it isn't an easy decision because I don't want to turn my back on someone but I feel like we really tried in the last 3.5 years. I really hope she finds the happiness she needs and she is able to express herself through other venues but I think it's best that sweet add no longer be one of them. anyway sorry to everyone involved and to anyone who is disappointed.
Charlie

...So with that coupled with my recent feeling of worthlessness I’ve been up all night not knowing what to do...no one seems to want to talk to me about this...they just want to dump there opinions and problems on me and leave...without even  giving back...Because I’m naive in this area I can’t understand what is appropriate give and take and what should and shouldn’t happen...I’m remorseful that I’m posting this, but its the only way I feel I can communicate anymore...through my body...it is my canvas, and blood is my paint... http://s23.photobucket.com/albums/b397/annajoy409/?action=view&current=CouldUseaFriend.flv

[Scrapheap]

Get professional help. You will not get the help you need online.

[Calandale]

Agreed. If you need help immediately, there are crisis lines.

I don't want to sound cold here, but we're just not qualified
to help.

[Pyraxis]

I think she's tried getting help already; this is not news.

[renaeden]

3.5 years is a long time to try and help somebody and not get to see them on their way to feeling better about themselves. 

[McGiver]

i think you need to accept jesus christ into your heart.
seek him as your lord and saviour.

[richard]

man fucking photobucket, takes everything down

[The_P]

Get professional help. You will not get the help you need online.

I know that's been suggested to her dozens of times, but seeking help from a bunch of strangers you barely talk to on the internet is a big no-no.

Hannah, ditch those internet losers and their forums and focus on improving your self-esteem.

[Callaway]

I'm sorry that your life is so difficult right now, Hannah.  I don't know how to help you, though.

Your picture was taken down from Photobucket, BTW.  I guess they don't host self-injurious photographs.

[Hannah]

Here's the new link... http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5351413100363110479

[McGiver]

you need to accept jesus christ as your lord and saviour.  you need to accept jesus into your heart and believe that he died for your sins....NOW!

[Calandale]

Perhaps she is Jesus.

[richard]

if you realy need help, there isnt any shame in looking for it. get out the white pages, and search. my guess is (no offence) if you were serious about haming yourself you'd be dead. but your not. and that is good! get help please

[Hannah]

i think you need to accept jesus christ into your heart.
seek him as your lord and saviour.

If you joking, then the hoax isn’t humorous to anyone but yourself...I am a Christian and as such I take offense to your dim-witted, statement made in the heat of idiocy...Please don’t  patronize me...I don’t need your shame, or your disapproval...One of the reasons I do self injure is attributed to my companionship with God...Its fucked up at the moment...my prayers are uttered in a clumsy way, I don’t speak to eloquently, and when I do my prayers are more like arguments then actual pleas for forgiveness...I’m upset with many things right now...many of the things that I have found solace in, have deceived me...I feel betrayed, hurt, wounded in more then just the physical...my mind suffers these burdens, and I feel that I walk this road to dead alone...“The arrows of the Almighty are in me, my spirit drinks in their poison; God's terrors are collected against me.” Job 6:4

[McGiver]

i think you need to accept jesus christ into your heart.
seek him as your lord and saviour.

If you joking, then the hoax isn’t humorous to anyone but yourself...I am a Christian and as such I take offense to your dim-witted, statement made in the heat of idiocy...Please don’t  patronize me...I don’t need your shame, or your disapproval...One of the reasons I do self injure is attributed to my companionship with God...Its fucked up at the moment...my prayers are uttered in a clumsy way, I don’t speak to eloquently, and when I do my prayers are more like arguments then actual pleas for forgiveness...I’m upset with many things right now...many of the things that I have found solace in, have deceived me...I feel betrayed, hurt, wounded in more then just the physical...my mind suffers these burdens, and I feel that I walk this road to dead alone...“The arrows of the Almighty are in me, my spirit drinks in their poison; God's terrors are collected against me.” Job 6:4

i was dead serious.


it seems to me that people who have hit rock bottom, such as yourself, could benefit greatly from a higher power....a crutch.