Perfection vs good

[Nomaken]

Not when I am advocating somebody to do what they want to.  They are either going to do what they want to, or do what somebody else wants them to, and it doesn't matter what he chooses to do because no matter what he is going to be doing what he wants.

[esme456]

Some people are more suggestible than others

What about that case of the bloke in the chat room who was encouraged to commit suicide by other people in
there and he went ahead and did it

That is a perfect example

[Nomaken]

Unless somebody forces him to do something, and he doesn't want them to, it is impossible for him to do anything but what he wants.  So regardless of how he interprets or uses my advice, he is going to follow it anyway.

[McGiver]

How can you possibly know how any advice you give to people might be interpreted or used?

Therefore isn't it a good idea to be as responsible when giving that advice as possible?

the same thing can be said about the advice that you are giving.

some depressed people might think, if just one more person blows sunshine up my ass today, or someone feeds me one more line of 'hang in there' it's going to be alright, i'll go postal.

some people need to be validated in the point that what they are feeling is not exclusive to them.  others share the pain and have these same thoughts.
then they realize that, ah hell, as long as they are't quiting....

[Nomaken]

some depressed people might think, if just one more person blows sunshine up my ass today, or someone feeds me one more line of 'hang in there' it's going to be alright, i'll go postal.

"blows sunshine up my ass"

I love it. 

[esme456]

Well pardon me for offering practical advice that has worked for me   

I have already stated I'm not good at empathy

There's always a majority doing that kind of 'I feel your pain but am not going to do anything as practical as
offer any advice cos it'll alienate other people and make me look too annoyingly positive' anyway so why queue up to just say the same thing in a different way?

I prefer to think of the actual person than my coolness/popularity quotient which is where I diverge from the majority of people on discussion forums

[esme456]

It's far easier to scoff than be genuine imo

[McGiver]

Well pardon me for offering practical advice that has worked for me   

I have already stated I'm not good at empathy

There's always a majority doing that kind of 'I feel your pain but am not going to do anything as practical as
offer any advice cos it'll alienate other people and make me look too annoyingly positive' anyway so why queue up to just say the same thing in a different way?

I prefer to think of the actual person than my coolness/popularity quotient which is where I diverge from the majority of people on discussion forums

i just know that you never know.

if nomaken was offering ideas of how to off himself, then i might think that you had a valid point, esmy.


different strokes and all that, you just never know what a person needs....

[McGiver]

It's far easier to scoff than be genuine imo

it is far easier to be genuine than to give someone false hope.

[esme456]

Giving hope itself is the main thing

Look through history - Really good people are invariably ignored and scoffed at
by the masses

Im not equating myself with one of these people, just explaining what goes with the territory

So feel free to carry on.....

[DirtDawg]

It's far easier to scoff than be genuine imo

it is far easier to be genuine than to give someone false hope.

We don't often disagree, but I have found the opposite to be true. It is often more of a challenge to remain honest than to tell someone what they want to hear, especially if you will receive no consequence from your words, as in the people you don't really have to deal with on a daily basis.
Knowing what someone wants to hear is next to impossible, but that doesn't stop most people from abandoning honesty.

[esme456]

Confusing as ever...

Firstly as you have quoted McJagger I am assuming that your comment is directed at him ie you are disagreeing with what he says?

But you are in effect agreeing with him Calamity

ie you're saying being honest/genuine is the best policy which is what McJagger said

And I never said I was telling anyone what they wanted to hear, just telling them what has worked for me

If you have a problem you tend to ask a person who has experience of that problem for advice imo

And if that person has managed to overcome said problem, all the better surely as it indicates that their advice
might work if I try it for myself??

[DirtDawg]

Easier and better are not the same. In fact, they often exclude each other.

[esme456]

I don't dispute that, it doesn't appear to be in dispute in this discussion though

[DirtDawg]

... just exploring the network of his statement, which was misleading, if taken literally. One of my deficits, maybe. I could try harder to find subtleties for you, but I'm not inclined.

It seemed to me that you brought up the need to re-phrase the obvious.

I also think you are very quick to establish an "as ever" with some people.