Wishes he was as awesome as The Doctor.
Hell, he wishes he was as awesome as K9.
Hey, K9 is awesome. A loyal robot dog that talks, can play chess (beating The Doctor at it) and friggin shoots lasers. Who the hell wouldn't want that?!
I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce.
Your problem is that your mother looks like a Doctor Who alien had a very ugly baby with a Star Trek alien from the original series. Probably between a Zygon and the Gorn.