-Turn out all the lights in whatever room he is in for five seconds if he says or types the words "hopeless," "meainingless" or "better to die."
I like posting in the dark. It keeps my emo attitude in high gear.
-Start playing christmas carols, regardless of the season, if his post volume exceeds one post every three minutes. As his posting increases, the music would get louder.
Would probably through me into a rage of posting.
-Shut off his internet connection if he frowns.
-Speed up his internet connection if he smiles.
I don't frown much. I do end up outright laughing
sometimes when I'm posting, but mainly when I'm
at my spammiest. Exactly when I most need the speed.
-Erase all the information on his computer AND release a 'bot that will remove all his Intensity posts if he tries to disable the system, or get someone else to (he will be made aware of this last caveat)
Ooh. A way to get rid of the incriminating evidence.
He would peridically be given the opportunity to disable the system by taking an empirically-backed test which rated him on an optimism/pessimism scale. While taking it, he would be hooked up to a lie detector. The system would be disabled if he scored more optimistic than pessimistic, without lying, three tests in a row.
Uhm...I'm an optimist, that's the problem.
If I weren't, I might settle for the misery
that is this existence.
I call it "Saw: Mr. Rogers Style."
I LOVE Mr. Rogers. Thanks.