Why do you think people see you as ugly and worthless? Why are you convinced that you are fat and ugly? Is there a reason why your self-confidence is basically zero?
Sorry if I'm getting personal and I don't mean to offend, I'm actually curious.
I'm more than happy to answer your question
1. Because that is how I see myself. I see so many other better looking people i'd be a fool to compete, and I know people would rather have them given the choice. I'm not prepared to be someones plan B, C, D etc. I might have no self esteem but I have some self respect
"Better looking" is subjective. Besides, if someone judges you by looks then they're probably not going to be great to begin with... and to be honest most people are like that sadly. I have seen this with other women before though, bullied or not. Easier said than done to convince them otherwise.
2. I am convinced I am fat because of society ideals, and the fact I carry too much weight for my frame from a medical point of view. I should be about 60kg give or take as an ideal weight. I'm something like 70kg.
This is odd, you don't look overweight at all. I wouldn't be too worried really, the way I see it is that having AS is already breaking society's "ideals" so personally I'd not worry about the fact I'm overweight. Hate is as good as love to me.
3. I am convinced i'm ugly because i've been told that all my life, simple really.
Like I said, what is ugly or not is subjective. Even if 90% of the world says it, you'll always get the 10% who says otherwise. Neither are right or wrong.
4. Probably being cut down by people. As embarassed as I am to admit, a lot of the time its internet people, and working with better looking people. Sir Les Patterson has been by far the worst on this site, and probably the reason I didn't come here for ages. jman has been pretty bad, especially putting that bra pic up here for ridicule. I re-read that thread last night and just about threw my laptop through the window in anger. What does it matter why I took the pic? Does the fact that pic exists really justify what you did? and a lot of males on gaming forums have too.
Jman did it because you turned him down for being a stalking eejit, so he got all butthurt and emo. His response was just typical revenge, although personally I think him making that thread shows that he is indeed butthurt and emo and should just grow a pair of balls. It may upset you, but that's the way most people are sadly. I had hassle with people in the past, photos photoshopped of me and everything. I just had to get thick skin because I knew I wouldn't cope otherwise. Took a few years though to develop it but it's worth it in the end. If I were you, I'd just roll my eyes at the thread and say to myself "jman sure is an emo cunt".