I am nosey.

[TheoK]

I'm on disability 

["couldbecousin"]

What do you guys do as your job? Do you enjoy it? Did you study a lot to get where you are?

Jus' curious.

I don't have a job right now. But when my savings run out I'm probs gonna have to be a barmaid or something. Then I'm gonna study. Interesting!

I run the claims and compliance departments for a national insurance brand during the day, and attend law school at night.

The law school part sounds fun! Your day job sounds like it might be helpful with like.. idk contract law or something.

Yes.  The most exciting part of the law.  Contracts

  Along with neckties and high voltage. 

[Bastet]

I am a Journeyman.   Inside Wireman Electrician most of the time it is fun. Sometimes it sucks.

My dad is a journeyman electrician.

["couldbecousin"]

  I was an underachieving college student, barely graduated. 


  Then at 22 I got a job in the kitchen of a retirement home and I've
  been there ever since.  (I'm now 46.)   

[ZEGH8578]

You guys all have legit grown-up sounding jobs. I am well jel.

I am a complete bum, but you know that :]

[ZEGH8578]

I'm on disability 

I want that. I'm sick of "never growing up". With accepting help from my family, they have of course gone overboard with productivity and optimism, so when I was offered disability, they told them no-way-in-hell on my behalf, and convinced me to try for studies and stuff that I KNOW I will not complete (and this has nothing to do with "self esteem", but simply logical prognosis)

They of course think it's all self esteem and that I'm terribly sad, and that all I need to not be aspie anymore, is to make some new friends, and realize how much fun university is 
It doesn't help that I've tried university. Twice. Along with all kinds of things that include people, social stuff, and "fun", such as martial arts (twice), military service, folkehøgskole...
It's enfuriating how blind people get when they _set their minds_ on something "Nono, you're just being negative. you'll see, once you meet fun and interesting people!"

I got rejected from uni now, so now I'm in limbo. I don't really want to tell them all to fuck off, cus I approached them, and asked for their help, but they are SO set on me studying my aspergers away at uni, they will not accept the only alternative left: Disability pay. To them it is the greatest shame ever, but to me it would be the relief I am waiting for for a decade now...
So frustrating to be so far apart, mind-wise, that they are so severely unfamiliar with how my mind works. That they even go around STILL thinking I'm depressed after I've told them - again and again - for YEARS that I'm not. They just think I'm lying to be "put up a brave face", there's no getting through to people

[TheoK]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

[Bastet]

I don't have a job yet. Working on a degree. I hope to have a job soon though. I love art. I am a 32 year old woman child. 

[ZEGH8578]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

No, no, all the formalities are there. That is why they offered it in the first place. The thing is, I asked for my (extremely helpful) stepmother to come along to these meetings, and sortof boil down all the babble in relevant terms I can relate to. Those meetings tend to be just hours of buzz "we need to map down what kind of maps we can map down to map down to communicate a map of maps" nothing makes sense, it's all very geared on _emotion_, on inspiring and gearing people up. Like those "programmes" they have, they are also focused on motivation, rather than practical assistance.

But as soon as disability was mentioned as the last logical resort, my stepmother eagerly interrupted, insisting that disability would be out of the question  since then I have told her myself, that I actually want disability, to which she keeps making _theoretically_ sound arguments, that _in theory_ it would pay much better to complete years of study, get a career, and get a super awesome job. It's hard to counter-argue, if all I have to deliver is "I will only fail studies." and the automatic response is "You're just being negative!"

I am only left with cutting them all off, which would be a very unthankful and assholish thing of me to do. I really don't want to do that. I'd prefer that they understood me, and backed off on their own. That way I can stay grateful to the all the assistance they have actually given me (which is a lot, including getting me diagnosed)

sigh... :I
Worst is, my best pal here is aspie, and just got diagnosed, and hes going on disability right away. I'm jealous

[odeon]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

Agreed. This is not about your family, this is about you.

[ZEGH8578]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

Agreed. This is not about your family, this is about you.

I know, but this isn't them snooping in my business, as much as me inviting them into my business. Their suggestions come from a good place, and it just feels very ungrateful to be rejecting them now. They just get into that delusional side of "normal people mentality" tho, and I can't live with that... It's difficult to find a "nice" way of telling them to back off, after I've asked for their support myself.
The other day I triiied to hint, by telling them that I'll never be "cured" from aspergers. They answered "We know that! But you can still live a totally normal life." <--- in other words, be cured from aspergers.

That kind of logical flaw, abundant among "normal people" is impossible to battle. I'm gonna have to basically get rude, and I really don't want that...

[odeon]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

Agreed. This is not about your family, this is about you.

I know, but this isn't them snooping in my business, as much as me inviting them into my business. Their suggestions come from a good place, and it just feels very ungrateful to be rejecting them now. They just get into that delusional side of "normal people mentality" tho, and I can't live with that... It's difficult to find a "nice" way of telling them to back off, after I've asked for their support myself.
The other day I triiied to hint, by telling them that I'll never be "cured" from aspergers. They answered "We know that! But you can still live a totally normal life." <--- in other words, be cured from aspergers.

That kind of logical flaw, abundant among "normal people" is impossible to battle. I'm gonna have to basically get rude, and I really don't want that...

I understand the problem but they are not the ones who have to live with the consequences of their support, you are, so you are making this to be about them by not wanting to hurt their feelings. They'll get over it, but will you?

[ZEGH8578]

Talk with your nut doctor and ask him to help you get it. Never mind what your family thinks 

Agreed. This is not about your family, this is about you.

I know, but this isn't them snooping in my business, as much as me inviting them into my business. Their suggestions come from a good place, and it just feels very ungrateful to be rejecting them now. They just get into that delusional side of "normal people mentality" tho, and I can't live with that... It's difficult to find a "nice" way of telling them to back off, after I've asked for their support myself.
The other day I triiied to hint, by telling them that I'll never be "cured" from aspergers. They answered "We know that! But you can still live a totally normal life." <--- in other words, be cured from aspergers.

That kind of logical flaw, abundant among "normal people" is impossible to battle. I'm gonna have to basically get rude, and I really don't want that...

I understand the problem but they are not the ones who have to live with the consequences of their support, you are, so you are making this to be about them by not wanting to hurt their feelings. They'll get over it, but will you?

I know. I've spiralled into this on my own, by "playing along" basically to calm them down/shut them up, but they were just too damn efficient, and suddenly I was facing years and years of neverending stress. With attitudes of "no worries, if you fail uni, youll just re apply, and re apply"
Now that I got rejected, their reaction was "no prob! youll just have to re-do your bad grades!" which was where I truly realized what an utterly impossible ambition it is they got for me. It's just pure stress, for life, because of dreamy delusions.

You're right tho, and I know it allready, I'm just waiting for a "right moment", I guess :I

[ZEGH8578]

I just texted her. I "owe" them to keep them in the loop. I asked if she'd join me to the social service offices, to help secure the disability payment. She said yes, next week she has the time. What a relief... I often fail to credit her for her patience and understanding. I hope she keeps that attitude untill next week tho But gah... if it actually works out... I'm gonna be a happy panda!

[Callaway]

I just texted her. I "owe" them to keep them in the loop. I asked if she'd join me to the social service offices, to help secure the disability payment. She said yes, next week she has the time. What a relief... I often fail to credit her for her patience and understanding. I hope she keeps that attitude untill next week tho But gah... if it actually works out... I'm gonna be a happy panda!

I hope it goes well and gets resolved soon.