Two Floridian women recently transplanting from New York on the beach in Miami, just emerging from the surf. One looks at the other sez to her friend "I'd just die for a ciggie right now!".
Her companion pulls a perfectly dry cigarette from her top and presents it with pride. Amazed, the first woman sez, "I don't suppose you have a match in there, ha ha?", and she withdraws a match, lights it and the cigarette.
Further amazed, the first smoker exhales a cloud with satisfaction and asks, "how did you do that?", whereupon the second woman withdraws a latex wrapped packet of loose cigs and matches from her top and shows it to her friend.
"It's just a condom, they have them at pharmacies everywhere. get the non lubed ones Works for me".
So, the next time the first woman's at a pharm, she asks the counterman for a condom. "What size?" He asks.
What? you mean they come in sizes?" She sez, Thinks a minute ...
"okay, thanks, I suppose something sized to fit Camels then."
Oh, no!
That would fit three packs of smoggies, a hand torch, meals for two days and a tent.
I didn't fix it, I just C&P'ed it. It obviously came from "elsewhere" and it has been doctored by a few 'mer'cans, but NO ONE fixed the grammar or tried to correct the punctuation! I thought that was also part of the joke, in my way of seeing these things.
For one thing, you do not "transplant" yourself. Calling someone a transplant is an insult of higher order.
Still funny!
