WTF, Trigger???

[The_Chosen_One]

Nobody answered my question: was Elle stalked online or IRL?

The reason I ask this is because if it were online, the threat is hardly one to be taken as seriously as a stalker hanging around your garden gate. If anyone did do this, it would more than likely be because of information given out by Elle herself that would attract someone who might decide to prey on her. Still, not as worrying as an IRL situation. An IRL stalker could have the police called on them, and they they would be dealt with and that would be the end. To deal with a virtual staler, all you have to do is set your email to junk anything you don't want (like spam) and block people you don't know on MSN etc. Texting someone you hardly know gives out your number to them for free use, as they then have control over what you have given them.

So in other words, a RL situation where you know for a fact someone is there stalking you would be taken more seriously than a virtual sitiuation where you should have complete control. Give out information, and you do it at your own risk.

IRL, but I think nobody wants to force her to relive a situation that was frightening and very upsetting to her.

I think that you must have never been stalked if you think that the solution is so simple.

No, never. What I do beleive is that an online situation is more easily handled, and what I would call trivial compared to an IRL one. If Elle was stalked IRL, then yes, it would have been frightening. In the virtual world, all anyone has to do is turn the computer off, block their calls and block their emails. Get's harder when the person is someone they may actually see following them, or someone they have contacted.

This world can be scary sometimes, but there are steps to avoid confrontations and problems.

['andersom']

Nobody answered my question: was Elle stalked online or IRL?

The reason I ask this is because if it were online, the threat is hardly one to be taken as seriously as a stalker hanging around your garden gate. If anyone did do this, it would more than likely be because of information given out by Elle herself that would attract someone who might decide to prey on her. Still, not as worrying as an IRL situation. An IRL stalker could have the police called on them, and they they would be dealt with and that would be the end. To deal with a virtual staler, all you have to do is set your email to junk anything you don't want (like spam) and block people you don't know on MSN etc. Texting someone you hardly know gives out your number to them for free use, as they then have control over what you have given them.

So in other words, a RL situation where you know for a fact someone is there stalking you would be taken more seriously than a virtual sitiuation where you should have complete control. Give out information, and you do it at your own risk.

IRL, but I think nobody wants to force her to relive a situation that was frightening and very upsetting to her.

I think that you must have never been stalked if you think that the solution is so simple.

No, never. What I do beleive is that an online situation is more easily handled, and what I would call trivial compared to an IRL one. If Elle was stalked IRL, then yes, it would have been frightening. In the virtual world, all anyone has to do is turn the computer off, block their calls and block their emails. Get's harder when the person is someone they may actually see following them, or someone they have contacted.

This world can be scary sometimes, but there are steps to avoid confrontations and problems.

Requires changing a lot of patterns.

And virtual stalkers can become IRL stalkers, IRL stalkers will not stay away from the internet either.

When you have been stalked, you can be on edge for a long time afterwards.

One, completely innocent text at the wrong time may bring it all back.

Not the fault of the texter though. Trigger didn't cross the lines I think.

It's just how things are. Getting rid of the mental effects of stalking takes a lot of time. And that sucks.

[midlifeaspie]

Every Monday I get back on the board and have to read a pages and pages and pages of weekend drama.  If you all wanted to be awesome you could get together and do me a huge favor, and try your best to keep the weekend drama from being so damn boring 

I think I have read 10 pages now of Trigger and Elle drama, and it's all about as interesting as the lint in my navel.

[Al Swearegen]

I Blame the bourbon fairies for the Star Wars allusions 

[midlifeaspie]

I Blame the bourbon fairies for the Star Wars allusions 

The bourbon fairies are usually good for a few laughs.  To be honest, I skimmed past all the Star Wars stuff.  Can I assume that it eventually evolved into someone wanting to fuck a character, probably Squiddy?

[Al Swearegen]

I can't remember. I think it was killing Squiddy rather than fucking him but same kind of thing I guess.

[Squidusa]

I Blame the bourbon fairies for the Star Wars allusions 

The bourbon fairies are usually good for a few laughs.  To be honest, I skimmed past all the Star Wars stuff.  Can I assume that it eventually evolved into someone wanting to fuck a character, probably Squiddy?

Damn you know me well.  :lol:

[Trigger 11]

Mockingly, of course!

[Scrapheap]

I Blame the bourbon fairies for the Star Wars allusions 

The bourbon fairies are usually good for a few laughs.  To be honest, I skimmed past all the Star Wars stuff.  Can I assume that it eventually evolved into someone wanting to fuck a character, probably Squiddy?

Damn you know me well.  :lol:

I thought you only swung the other way? so you swing both ways? or was this someone wanting to fuck you? shit I'm cunfoosed now. Damn Rum fairies.

[El]

Nobody answered my question: was Elle stalked online or IRL?

The reason I ask this is because if it were online, the threat is hardly one to be taken as seriously as a stalker hanging around your garden gate. If anyone did do this, it would more than likely be because of information given out by Elle herself that would attract someone who might decide to prey on her. Still, not as worrying as an IRL situation. An IRL stalker could have the police called on them, and they they would be dealt with and that would be the end. To deal with a virtual staler, all you have to do is set your email to junk anything you don't want (like spam) and block people you don't know on MSN etc. Texting someone you hardly know gives out your number to them for free use, as they then have control over what you have given them.

So in other words, a RL situation where you know for a fact someone is there stalking you would be taken more seriously than a virtual sitiuation where you should have complete control. Give out information, and you do it at your own risk.

Both IRL and online.  Same person using various methods of monitoring me.  At the time, I didn't know how far he'd take it; he took it farther than I'd expected him to, and it was scary as fuck.  I had mutual friends warning me about him, worried about me.  It reached a point where I was starting to consider taking RL legal action to protect myself, but fortunately did not actually reach that point.

As PPK's sig says, "Harden the fuck up".   My impression of trigger is that he needs to grow up and elle needs to move on.  Life sucks, we make mistakes and we get crapped on.  Is there any kind of happy medium or am I being delusional???   

Elle expects every sexual partner to submit to an STD test.....or has that changed?  Trigger misread an intention and went beyond it.  I did the same and that was a learning experience.   

My girlfriend doesn't play games and is one to give me a "dope slap" when I go off.  I like that, if I screw up she tells me or if she goes bonkers she accepts me telling her that she needs to back off.

No texting, no mind games, no crap.

Bolded part:  1. out of the blue in this context (why?) and 2. you make it sound like you think that's unreasonable.

Elle: this should teach you one thing - don't give out your mobile number unless you expect it to be used. You did, so therefore you have to wear the consequences.

Maybe you should have turned the thing off and let it go to message-bank as well.

*nod*  I was stupid and probably should not have met Trigger to begin with, let alone texted him and thereby let him have my number.  Mean well or not, he has periods of time where he gets weird about boundaries, and I should have anticipated that that was potentially a cyclic thing with him, and not just a one-shot deal once upon a time.

[The_Chosen_One]

Nobody answered my question: was Elle stalked online or IRL?

The reason I ask this is because if it were online, the threat is hardly one to be taken as seriously as a stalker hanging around your garden gate. If anyone did do this, it would more than likely be because of information given out by Elle herself that would attract someone who might decide to prey on her. Still, not as worrying as an IRL situation. An IRL stalker could have the police called on them, and they they would be dealt with and that would be the end. To deal with a virtual staler, all you have to do is set your email to junk anything you don't want (like spam) and block people you don't know on MSN etc. Texting someone you hardly know gives out your number to them for free use, as they then have control over what you have given them.

So in other words, a RL situation where you know for a fact someone is there stalking you would be taken more seriously than a virtual sitiuation where you should have complete control. Give out information, and you do it at your own risk.

Both IRL and online.  Same person using various methods of monitoring me.  At the time, I didn't know how far he'd take it; he took it farther than I'd expected him to, and it was scary as fuck.  I had mutual friends warning me about him, worried about me.  It reached a point where I was starting to consider taking RL legal action to protect myself, but fortunately did not actually reach that point.

As PPK's sig says, "Harden the fuck up".   My impression of trigger is that he needs to grow up and elle needs to move on.  Life sucks, we make mistakes and we get crapped on.  Is there any kind of happy medium or am I being delusional???   

Elle expects every sexual partner to submit to an STD test.....or has that changed?  Trigger misread an intention and went beyond it.  I did the same and that was a learning experience.   

My girlfriend doesn't play games and is one to give me a "dope slap" when I go off.  I like that, if I screw up she tells me or if she goes bonkers she accepts me telling her that she needs to back off.

No texting, no mind games, no crap.

Bolded part:  1. out of the blue in this context (why?) and 2. you make it sound like you think that's unreasonable.

Elle: this should teach you one thing - don't give out your mobile number unless you expect it to be used. You did, so therefore you have to wear the consequences.

Maybe you should have turned the thing off and let it go to message-bank as well.

*nod*  I was stupid and probably should not have met Trigger to begin with, let alone texted him and thereby let him have my number.  Mean well or not, he has periods of time where he gets weird about boundaries, and I should have anticipated that that was potentially a cyclic thing with him, and not just a one-shot deal once upon a time.

Thanks for the explanation, it clears up some things.

Dunno about the not meeting Trigger part, tho'. Neither of you could have known what giveing out your number, even via text could have led to. I see him as a mate here, but I'm unlikely to ever meet him as the distances would be too great to cross. I'd also like to see you as a mate as well, and for the same reason, it would not be practical for us to meet. I now understand a litttle more about the situation, and it's a pity things hadn't worked out better.

 

[Al Swearegen]

I don't see the whole he has a problem with personal boundaries stuff any more than I see you having a problem with foisting a lot of fairly accusatory aspects about someone's character based on what appears to be one unexpected phone call (an apology) by an acquaintance.
In fact to be honest I really am not seeing much deserving in some of the mud you are slinging trigger's way at all.
I agree it was pretty silly to come in and defend you from me over something we had sorted out a while ago and by which any reading would have disclosed that. As said. He not only let the cat out of the bag but shook shit out of it beforehand.
The inferences of you about him having issues with personal boundaries and disclosing information and basically acting like a creepy stalker....were they justified? Were you demands of him on this board a little unjustified?
Honestly, it really doesn't appear that way.

[Squidusa]

I Blame the bourbon fairies for the Star Wars allusions 

The bourbon fairies are usually good for a few laughs.  To be honest, I skimmed past all the Star Wars stuff.  Can I assume that it eventually evolved into someone wanting to fuck a character, probably Squiddy?

Damn you know me well.  :lol:

I thought you only swung the other way? so you swing both ways? or was this someone wanting to fuck you? shit I'm cunfoosed now. Damn Rum fairies.

I only like the cock , Hubert's assumption I would want to fuck one of the characters was correct , I wanted to do Ewan Mcgregor's Obi Wan Kenobi. 

[Psychophant]

Nobody answered my question: was Elle stalked online or IRL?

The reason I ask this is because if it were online, the threat is hardly one to be taken as seriously as a stalker hanging around your garden gate. If anyone did do this, it would more than likely be because of information given out by Elle herself that would attract someone who might decide to prey on her. Still, not as worrying as an IRL situation. An IRL stalker could have the police called on them, and they they would be dealt with and that would be the end. To deal with a virtual staler, all you have to do is set your email to junk anything you don't want (like spam) and block people you don't know on MSN etc. Texting someone you hardly know gives out your number to them for free use, as they then have control over what you have given them.

So in other words, a RL situation where you know for a fact someone is there stalking you would be taken more seriously than a virtual sitiuation where you should have complete control. Give out information, and you do it at your own risk.

Both IRL and online.  Same person using various methods of monitoring me.  At the time, I didn't know how far he'd take it; he took it farther than I'd expected him to, and it was scary as fuck.  I had mutual friends warning me about him, worried about me.  It reached a point where I was starting to consider taking RL legal action to protect myself, but fortunately did not actually reach that point.

As PPK's sig says, "Harden the fuck up".   My impression of trigger is that he needs to grow up and elle needs to move on.  Life sucks, we make mistakes and we get crapped on.  Is there any kind of happy medium or am I being delusional???   

Elle expects every sexual partner to submit to an STD test.....or has that changed?  Trigger misread an intention and went beyond it.  I did the same and that was a learning experience.   

My girlfriend doesn't play games and is one to give me a "dope slap" when I go off.  I like that, if I screw up she tells me or if she goes bonkers she accepts me telling her that she needs to back off.

No texting, no mind games, no crap.

Bolded part:  1. out of the blue in this context (why?) and 2. you make it sound like you think that's unreasonable.

Elle: this should teach you one thing - don't give out your mobile number unless you expect it to be used. You did, so therefore you have to wear the consequences.

Maybe you should have turned the thing off and let it go to message-bank as well.

*nod*  I was stupid and probably should not have met Trigger to begin with, let alone texted him and thereby let him have my number.  Mean well or not, he has periods of time where he gets weird about boundaries, and I should have anticipated that that was potentially a cyclic thing with him, and not just a one-shot deal once upon a time.

I was prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt.  But, after a lot of reading and thinking, it seems like you have the greater issues then trigger.    Whatever you have been through, you need to get through it and be the counselor you want to be.  Nothing personal, but, if I went into counseling and met somebody like you..................I'd request another counselor, because I do not think you would be a good one for a male client.    MLA confronted me on my arrogance on being an emt and I deserved it.   If I'm going to be with people at their worst moments and most vulnerable...I need to park my ego at the door.  Can you!!!??    What you need and expect in your personal life is now NOMFB.   I will now back off and leave your threads and responses alone.   God knows, I don't need to be accused of stalking by anyone. 

[Psychophant]

Oh and don't get me wrong PMS, but, I'm just asking for more then a few posts before I give you the benefit of the doubt.   I want to give you all the leeway, but, for some reason I feel that being a guy makes me a target for your rage and issues.  Don't like it, tooo bad.  I've been screwed over by women, do I take it all out on women, Noooooooooooooooo.  It's my problem, not yours or theirs, and my girlfriend calls me out on it when I slip.