How are you feeling right now? (Pt 2)

[odeon]

Unwell.

[Zippo]

  FUCKING AWESOME! 

[eris]

distant, hellish. maybe a bit gassy too so not helping the situation. i jst sent out this facebook message to my ex boyfriend. i am thinking it sounds a bit psychotic maybe

dear small one,

so thinking back as far as i can remember, taking what i can get seemed a viable option. i think i am a pretty nice person but i dont understand the world around me too well. i dont understand how to relate to other people too well. i can blame it on my autism but that is a cop out. so im fuciing paul again, but i know better than to give any fucks about it. like i am with you i guess. i want to give fucks. i want to give lots of fucks, but fucks are not to be gotten in return. i wish i was ok with this but i can't just be stone, against my nature. i fear you only like me because i am here; the cruelest thing you can do to someone is act like you care when you really dont. story of my life. how can i learn to give no fucks ? i do not pretend with my desires i just fail to realize and control them. you're a beautiful sailor. always thought so. always. im not myself. i want someone to give fucks.

- K

[eris]

my brother just said something brilliant. that almost never happens so i thought i'd record it here for posterity

"Some days the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands"

[eris]

there are too many worms in my brain today; i should go fishing. i want to want to want to give fucks, and yellow and red might mean what they used to. does anyone give fucks ? prolly. prolly. I know you do S***. i guess we all want what we cant have something. to have someone give fucks.

i should go fishing

[P7PSP]

there are too many worms in my brain today; i should go fishing. i want to want to want to give fucks, and yellow and red might mean what they used to. does anyone give fucks ? prolly. prolly. I know you do S***. i guess we all want what we cant have something. to have someone give fucks.

i should go fishing

Once you get off your ass to go fishing you will either go fishing or decide that you need to do something else. Initial movement is critical.

[eris]

there are too many worms in my brain today; i should go fishing. i want to want to want to give fucks, and yellow and red might mean what they used to. does anyone give fucks ? prolly. prolly. I know you do S***. i guess we all want what we cant have something. to have someone give fucks.

i should go fishing

Once you get off your ass to go fishing you will either go fishing or decide that you need to do something else. Initial movement is critical.

pond is frozen; worms might actually be maggots. the cool air felt good tho. i should come out of the gutter and go sailing after i thaw

distant, hellish. maybe a bit gassy too so not helping the situation. i jst sent out this facebook message to my ex boyfriend. i am thinking it sounds a bit psychotic maybe

dear small one,

so thinking back as far as i can remember, taking what i can get seemed a viable option. i think i am a pretty nice person but i dont understand the world around me too well. i dont understand how to relate to other people too well. i can blame it on my autism but that is a cop out. so im fuciing paul again, but i know better than to give any fucks about it. like i am with you i guess. i want to give fucks. i want to give lots of fucks, but fucks are not to be gotten in return. i wish i was ok with this but i can't just be stone, against my nature. i fear you only like me because i am here; the cruelest thing you can do to someone is act like you care when you really dont. story of my life. how can i learn to give no fucks ? i do not pretend with my desires i just fail to realize and control them. you're a beautiful sailor. always thought so. always. im not myself. i want someone to give fucks.

- K

his answer is, "who is paul. i give fucks about that"

how manly. i guess it is better than no news.

[eris]

i cried for the first time in like 6 months today. srsly. very cathartic

headache didnt budge. i just dont wanna deal.

[Adam]

Pretty good. Just called my best mate. I shoulda put my credit on my phone though. Feel much better after talking to someone (having a laugh I mean, not "talking to someone" in a therapy kinda way haha)

Also really looking forward to this week. There's lectures and talks and guided tours on for manchester historries festival, I have my friend coming to stay for a couple days, and I'm seeing Rammstein on Thursday night. They were fucking brilliant last year , and after seeing YT vids of this tour,I think theyre gonna be even fucking better this time. Seriously can't wait

Only thing I'm worried about is my mood generally being much lower. It's a lot harder to focus on other things and take my mind off it. I'm hoping it's just temporary from withdrawal, but it sucks either way. Can only do my best though

[odeon]

Headachy.

[earthboundmisfit]

horny. isn't there a 'horny and can't sleep' thread?

[odeon]

I think there is. Started by Binty, IIRC. Not that I can be arsed to find it.

[Queen Victoria]

Tooth fill/repair feels a awkward and a bit high.  Will see if it feels more natural in a few days.

[Kaelyrhn]

Depressed

[Callaway]

Depressed

Are you still taking medication for bipolar disorder?  You were either manic or hypomanic recently, so maybe the medication needs tweaking if you are still taking it.