Author Topic: Door to door jesus  (Read 1219 times)

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DukeNukem

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #30 on: March 24, 2010, 09:09:55 PM »

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #31 on: March 25, 2010, 05:58:30 AM »
^

That's OK. The Jehova Witnesses will accept you in their circles. Just repent and be obedient. And everything will turn out fine for you.
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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #32 on: March 25, 2010, 02:11:10 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #33 on: March 25, 2010, 03:17:15 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #34 on: March 25, 2010, 03:25:45 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

We were on a black-list for years. Too dangerous to talk to. Was nice and quiet. (living close to the national conference hall does make that bus-loads of witnesses are dropped in our village quite often)
I can do upside down chocolate moo things!

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #35 on: March 25, 2010, 03:29:17 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

We were on a black-list for years. Too dangerous to talk to. Was nice and quiet. (living close to the national conference hall does make that bus-loads of witnesses are dropped in our village quite often)

How do you bet blacklisted?  I want it now do I have to kill one?
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

Offline 'andersom'

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #36 on: March 25, 2010, 03:41:29 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

We were on a black-list for years. Too dangerous to talk to. Was nice and quiet. (living close to the national conference hall does make that bus-loads of witnesses are dropped in our village quite often)

How do you bet blacklisted?  I want it now do I have to kill one?

My ex once invited them in, to have a go at his own fundamentalistic upbringing (from the same root as Jehova Witnesses, but a different church). Happened to be an elder he invited in. My ex was that good that there were whole meetings on that, and only conversation in writing for a while. A group of 'wise' men, vs my ex. After that we were avoided for years and years. And they did ring all the other bells in the street.
I can do upside down chocolate moo things!

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #37 on: March 25, 2010, 03:45:19 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

We were on a black-list for years. Too dangerous to talk to. Was nice and quiet. (living close to the national conference hall does make that bus-loads of witnesses are dropped in our village quite often)

How do you bet blacklisted?  I want it now do I have to kill one?

My ex once invited them in, to have a go at his own fundamentalistic upbringing (from the same root as Jehova Witnesses, but a different church). Happened to be an elder he invited in. My ex was that good that there were whole meetings on that, and only conversation in writing for a while. A group of 'wise' men, vs my ex. After that we were avoided for years and years. And they did ring all the other bells in the street.


Seventh Day Adventist?  I just send my smart ass son to play with them but they keep coming back :-\
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

Scrapheap

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #38 on: March 25, 2010, 03:45:45 PM »
^ A similar thing happed at my parents house. A couple of Mormons knocked on the door, my dad answered and he proceded to school them on their own religion. That was 25 years ago, and they haven't been back since. Our neighbors haven't been so lucky.

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #39 on: March 25, 2010, 03:47:55 PM »
Tell them you're a wiccan, worked for my mom. :laugh:

She's also really good at the "crazy old woman with dementia" routine and plays it to her advantage.

She is as sharp as a tack, just evil.




Offline 'andersom'

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #40 on: March 25, 2010, 03:48:31 PM »
I had a Jehovah Witnesses approach me while I was walking the dogs they were barking and snarling at her as they could feel  my anxiety but she just kept talking like nothing was happening  :-\

You probably could of let the dogs chew on her a bit and gotten the same reaction.

My SIL used to have that glazed appearance some days after coming from the kingdom hall, like a robot that was freshly programmed. :zombiefuck:

Surprisingly we got along okay, she agreed not to try to convert me & I agreed not to shove her head in the oven.

We were on a black-list for years. Too dangerous to talk to. Was nice and quiet. (living close to the national conference hall does make that bus-loads of witnesses are dropped in our village quite often)

How do you bet blacklisted?  I want it now do I have to kill one?

My ex once invited them in, to have a go at his own fundamentalistic upbringing (from the same root as Jehova Witnesses, but a different church). Happened to be an elder he invited in. My ex was that good that there were whole meetings on that, and only conversation in writing for a while. A group of 'wise' men, vs my ex. After that we were avoided for years and years. And they did ring all the other bells in the street.


Seventh Day Adventist?  I just send my smart ass son to play with them but they keep coming back :-\

Wow, you're good!

He was raised in a splintergroup of the SDA. Reformists, SDA in overdrive. Later that changed towards a more mellow SDA.
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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #41 on: March 25, 2010, 03:58:12 PM »
I now get a very old man, nearing 90. And I've told him I don't want to hear about his truth. He is allowed to tell what it meant for him, in his life, but he is not to tell me his religious truth. He has told all kinds of stories way back in history. And if I'm in the mood, I do like to listen. But as soon as he starts telling me religious truths the door closes, and he knows that. He's a gentle man, with a very sweet wife. Him not being allowed to talk in his usual idiom does lower his defences. I've had him sobbing at my door once. Nothing bad, he just was sad. He struggled a while, with my demands. His wife loved it though, so he had no choice but to give in.
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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #42 on: March 25, 2010, 04:24:53 PM »
I know a few very strict SDA to each his own is all I say they don't bug me as long as I don't work their jobs on Saturday and watch my language.  One of the brothers in the construction company left and tells lots of stories about growing up as on I don't think I would ever make it :laugh:
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #43 on: March 25, 2010, 06:45:02 PM »
I had 2 Jehovah's Witnesses come to my door the other day, one of them started going down the normal pre-scripted spiel when I stopped him and asked what church he was from.  When he said J/W, I said "Thanks for the offer, but I gave up on playing the lottery, I'd have better chances of being struck by lightning while sitting in my watchtower".  He didn't get it at first, but his partner who was with him (who hadn't said a word the entire time) suddenly got a disgusted look on his face, grabbed the guy by the arm and said "it's time to go".

For anyone who doesn't get that, the J/Ws believe that Heaven has only a certain number of vacancies, so even if you play your cards right, you still only have a 20% or so chance of actually getting in to heaven.  Also, the J/W monthly newsletter is called "The Watchtower".
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Re: Door to door jesus
« Reply #44 on: March 26, 2010, 04:57:47 AM »
I had 2 Jehovah's Witnesses come to my door the other day, one of them started going down the normal pre-scripted spiel when I stopped him and asked what church he was from.  When he said J/W, I said "Thanks for the offer, but I gave up on playing the lottery, I'd have better chances of being struck by lightning while sitting in my watchtower".  He didn't get it at first, but his partner who was with him (who hadn't said a word the entire time) suddenly got a disgusted look on his face, grabbed the guy by the arm and said "it's time to go".

For anyone who doesn't get that, the J/Ws believe that Heaven has only a certain number of vacancies, so even if you play your cards right, you still only have a 20% or so chance of actually getting in to heaven.  Also, the J/W monthly newsletter is called "The Watchtower".
I have heard that too. What of the people that have already died or those yet to live? I think the percentage is smaller. Would they let autistics in?
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