Educational

Author Topic: Found baby rabbit  (Read 1597 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

TheoK

  • Guest
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #45 on: July 17, 2009, 11:35:17 AM »
I killed flies and gave it but it wouldn't eat them.  :-\

Offline Leto729

  • The God Emperor of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14008
  • Karma: 596
  • Gender: Male
  • Shai-Hulud
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #46 on: July 17, 2009, 11:36:30 AM »
I had a little wounded bat in 1998. It had a broken wing and all vets in the county were on vacation. I gave it milk and cream to eat but it died after a week or so. It's buried in a cigar box behind the woodshed.  :(
I have not buried it yet but will put it by its mother. :'(
Guardian of the Empire

Offline Leto729

  • The God Emperor of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14008
  • Karma: 596
  • Gender: Male
  • Shai-Hulud
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #47 on: July 17, 2009, 11:38:36 AM »
I killed flies and gave it but it wouldn't eat them.  :-\
It is a live and learn experience with animals isn't it.
Guardian of the Empire

TheoK

  • Guest
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #48 on: July 17, 2009, 11:43:15 AM »
I killed flies and gave it but it wouldn't eat them.  :-\
It is a live and learn experience with animals isn't it.

Yup.

Offline RageBeoulve

  • Super sand nigger
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 16783
  • Karma: 927
  • Gender: Male
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #49 on: July 17, 2009, 11:45:42 AM »
I killed flies and gave it but it wouldn't eat them.  :-\

Naw it likes them alive. Eating on the wing.
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline Leto729

  • The God Emperor of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14008
  • Karma: 596
  • Gender: Male
  • Shai-Hulud
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #50 on: July 17, 2009, 12:03:10 PM »
We learn about being humans and being apart of Humanity by taking care of pets or other animals.

Baby brought  a understanding of caring for other animals like her.

Even Shyla knows she is dead. In Her dog ways.

I now take her out by her mother so she can RIP. :(
Guardian of the Empire

Offline jman

  • Road warrior pimpdaddy of the aspie elite
  • Elder
  • Dedicated Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2564
  • Karma: 161
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #51 on: July 19, 2009, 11:13:56 PM »
This monitor lizard found some baby rabbits too  :zoinks:


Offline punkdrew

  • News Box Feature
  • Dedicated Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 3567
  • Karma: 353
  • Gender: Male
  • TURN UP THE SIGNAL-WIPE OUT THE NOISE
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #52 on: July 20, 2009, 01:20:13 AM »
I remember a series of Calvin & Hobbes strips where Calvin finds a baby raccoon and tries to nurse it back to health, without success. After the raccoon dies, Calvin walks off into the distance with Hobbes, saying, "What a stupid world."

Further, deponent sayeth not.
Quote
Alex179: Everything that is living is dying.   It will stop dying when it is dead.
"Earth is the cradle of Humanity. But one cannot live in a cradle forever."--Konstantin Tsiolkovsky
The law is the law. Rules are rules. God is God. A is A. Black is black. I want my baby back.

Offline RageBeoulve

  • Super sand nigger
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 16783
  • Karma: 927
  • Gender: Male
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #53 on: July 29, 2009, 07:52:34 PM »
I remember a series of Calvin & Hobbes strips where Calvin finds a baby raccoon and tries to nurse it back to health, without success. After the raccoon dies, Calvin walks off into the distance with Hobbes, saying, "What a stupid world."

Further, deponent sayeth not.

Heres another one that I thought was extremely funny.

Calvin lay there in bed, next to his tiger. His fourteenth birthday was tomorrow. He was getting older, puberty striking at his mind, voice, and body. He kissed Hobbes on the cheek, pulling him closer and thanking him for being his friend. Then it happened. It had been happening often since he was thirteen and he had no control over it. His erection tented his boxers, pressing against his friend's rump. "Stop.." Hobbes mumbled with a growl, pushing him away.

Calvin turned onto his back, pulling his under shorts down and revealing his standing pillar, about five inches. Average, he figured. He shook Hobbes awake. He didn't wake easily and grumbled and growled, but eventually sat up.

"What, Calvin?" He asked angrily, wanting very much to go back to sleep.

"I love you."

"I love you too.." Hobbes said awkwardly. 'What is this about?' He wondered.

"Do you really love me?"

"Yeah, why?" Hobbes sat up further, sleep forgotten.

"I want to mate with you.." Calvin blushed.

"Wait! What?"

"I love you so much, I want to show you how much I love you, how much I appreciate how you've cared for me over the years, and been there for me. Now I want to be there for you." Hobbes looked perplexed, he stared at Calvin, and then at the corner of his eye, there he saw it, Calvin's standing erection, dead toward his face. He knew instantly.

"Oh..." There was a pause, for a moment they did nothing but lay there, Calvin staring hungerly toward Hobbes' beautiful fuzzy face as he in turn looked directly at Calvin's smooth young cock. A feeling stirred inside of Hobbes that he'd never felt before, not even through all of the years they had been friends. He bit his lower lip. "Calvin, I.."

"Please, just kiss me."

"I-"

"Please, just once. If you don't like it, I'll never bring it up again. Just once, please, for me."

Hobbes was silent, but then slowly replied, "Okay. For you." Calvin's hand reached up behind Hobbes' whiskered, furry neck, and slowly drew their faces closer to each other. His lips parted softly and a soft moaning emanated from them, anticipating the taste of his friends wet tiger mouth to come. Hobbes resisted, but that only made Calvin pull him in harder. Their lips met sideways, mouths open, their labored breaths mixing with each others. Calvin pulled away slightly as they fully contacted with each other.

"Oh, Hobbes. Hobbes..." A wave of sensation filled Hobbes' entire body, every muscle quaked with a shock of pure pleasure, his body melted, his lips quivered as they moved wet and hot against his friend's. With each passing of their tongues, he became more ravenous. More hungry. More like a tiger. He suddenly pulled away, his claws extended, accidentally scratching Calvin across the cheek.

"Oh god, Calvin. I, fuck."

"Just let it come to you, old buddy."

"Fuck, I.. Fuck me."

"What?"

"I said fuck me. Fuck me now."

"Turn over."

Hobbes immediately and excitedly turned over onto his stomach, his ass facing toward Calvin, the muscles of his tail causing it to lift high in the air, exposing the bright pink, smooth asshole that poked through the fuzz of his tiger-cheeks. He moaned in soft anticipation. He was afraid Calvin's mother might hear. "FUCK ME. PLEASE. PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME WAIT."

Hobbes was nearly crying, as Calvin's hesitation was like a thousand stabs to his heart. He felt like his world was tearing apart, lest his old childhood friend fucked him in the ass, right then and there. "Sure thing, buddy." Calvin grasped the base of his cock, touching the top to the base of Hobbes' bright pink asshole. From the depths of Hobbes' throat came a mighty roar like that which had never been witnessed, as Calvin's hard, 13 year old cock slid roughly into the depths of his ass. Calvin's hips began to jerk, he felt the warmth of his friend's insides, he was fucking Hobbes in the ass.

He knew this, but he just couldn't believe it. But he always came back to that warmth, and it shocked him back to the pleasure of his present reality. "OH GOD" Hobbes roared out, his English words were barely intelligible through his native animal tongue. Calvin pumped faster, harder, deeper into his tiger's asshole, feeling the warm, wet suction as it pumped in and out. Hobbes' asshole began to bleed, and it only made Calvin hornier.

"Oh God, oh Jesus. I love you, Hobbes. I love you." "I love you too. Oh God I do." Calvin's thrusting was so frantic, that neither had any room for words after so many minutes. They simply fell into the pleasure, into the depth of the feeling. Two friends, deeply rooted in fun and adventure, in the science of box transmogrify, time travel, Film Noir, it all came rushing to them. Calvin thought back on so many memories he'd had with this dear cherished friend, and came back to the moment at hand, and he realized that all of those beautiful moments finally had a focal point. He finally got what he wanted.

He finally was making love to Hobbes. He continued to thrust, unthinking, until Hobbes turned, stared into his eyes. "Remember the time your house was robbed while you were away on vacation? When I was in the house? Oh god, I was so scared. I thought I would never see you again. I wanted to tell you so many things. That night, god, I wanted you to make love to me. I thought I would never have you again. Please come. Come in me like I always wanted you to that night. COME IN ME!"

Calvin's penis contracted in 5 spasms that shook the very depths of Hobbes' small, tight ass. He filled Hobbes to his stomach with his loving cum. He filled his ass. And he filled both of their hearts.

"GOD I FUCKING LOVE YOU. OH GOD."

"I LOVE YOU TOO. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH."

They screamed to the heavens, these two, best friends, becoming one. But they were cut short by a sudden noise. Calvin's mother came rushing into his room, her robe barely tied, her feet tripping up over themselves as she clumsily made her way to him in the dark. She flicked on the light. There, she saw her son, completely naked, hands gripped tightly over the waist of a stuffed tiger, his penis half way inside of a hole torn out of the stuffing of its backside. The stuffing from Hobbes' insides littered the sheets and the lower part of Calvin's body. "Are you, oh my god." The next morning, Calvin's mother told his father what had happened, after recovering from the shock, and Calvin's father spent the day beating the shit out of him, Calvin was broken almost to the very edge of his life. And when it was over, and Calvin was able to recover and see out of one eye, he made Calvin watch him as he shoved his stuffed tiger, Hobbes, his best friend in the whole world, the love of his life, into a wood chipper. Calvin cried, but his dad just backhanded him and told him to go finish his homework. The next day, Calvin's parents scheduled him to permanently see a psychiatrist. 3 years later, Calvin shot himself in the face.
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline TheOtherWindow

  • Constant Poster
  • ****
  • Posts: 319
  • Karma: 55
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #54 on: July 29, 2009, 08:06:01 PM »
Hahahaha. Poor Calvin. That story reminds me of this, possibly the very first chain email I ever got.  :zoinks:

Offline RageBeoulve

  • Super sand nigger
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 16783
  • Karma: 927
  • Gender: Male
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #55 on: July 29, 2009, 08:10:00 PM »
Hahahaha. Poor Calvin. That story reminds me of this, possibly the very first chain email I ever got.  :zoinks:

LMFAO. Thats sheer genius right there.

How about this?

TomorrowIll was laying in a beautiful field, full of flowers and sunshine.
With him were 5 naked lolis licking his cock o' so softly and taking turns with the naked cat boys that stick their immature cocks in TI's butthole.
All was well for TI. Or was it?
Things were indeed good until he looks to his left and sees a dead woman next time him.
The dead body has been laying out in the sun for a few days, so she was starting to turn color. It smelt like sweet sweet victory as one of the cat boys force TI's fingers into the womans heated up vagoo.
He felt around and it reminded him of a deliousous green bean casserole. Sick to his stomach he trys to escape but the lolis grew older and held him down so he couldn't move.
Hell has come to earth as TI screams for help. Women of his own age make him vomit onto the dead woman.
He is force to lick the vomit off the body when suddenly he wakes up.
"Oh thank god.." TI says to himself.
"It was dream...it was just a bad dream"
The lights turn on.
No TI, it wasn't a dream, says the dead woman.
Then TI was a zombie.


Or this?

The stands cheer as Hitler fights on.
His next opponent walks out of the gate.
A great light blinds Hitler as he struggles to see a dark image walk ever closer to him, he knows his opponent.
He forces himself to stand up and focus on the one and only, Jesus Christ.
As frightening as it may sound, Hitler was not scared.
Instead, anger filled his blood stream, a everlasting hate on a man from his childhood.
Jesus tried to save Hitler, but Hitler had enough.
Out of Hitler's bad of danger he pulls out a yellow bag.
He then clinches something in a shape of a handle and swings the bag towards Jesus' face.
Jesus instantly falls to the ground as Hitler begins to giggle like a 12 year old girl.
Hitler exposes the object in the yellow bag, yup definitely a hammer.
Now that everyone can see what Hitler has swung at Jesus, he continues.
one, two, seven more hits from the hammer begin to dis form Jesus' holy face, blood is everywhere.


Jesus now lays on the ground making what seems to be a gurgling noise as Hitler reaches into his bag and pulls out a screwdriver.
He yells out to the sky in German "Tötet alle Juden!" and begins to stabs Jesus multiple times in the stomach puncturing all organs in his abdominal region.
The torture isn't over yet for Jesus Christ.
Hitler figures that Jesus don't need no eyes so slowly he begins to poke them out with his trusty screwdriver.

Now that Jesus is blind and broken into the dirty Jew lover he was born to be, Hitler decides to give him a few more blows to the head with his good ol' hammer.
Again he smacks Jesus on the side head and more blood starts to pour out of his Jew head.
Hitler takes out a straw and slurps the blood off his face, nothing better than freshly squeezed Jew.
Did I forget to mention that Jesus is a Jew?
Hitler takes more of his blood and wipes it on his face only to become a robot.

Well Hitler is victorious, and it's a good thing his buddy caught it all on camera with his cell phone.
Good times.
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline RageBeoulve

  • Super sand nigger
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 16783
  • Karma: 927
  • Gender: Male
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #56 on: July 29, 2009, 08:15:16 PM »
Or maybe some of dis?

I was already worried while walking towards the toilet, seeing it had been almost a week since the last time I took a crap. I figured it would be like the last time: I'd sit there, push until my face got red, put up with it and get a little beeding in my anus. That would be all, no one would die and the whole event wouldn't last more than 25 min.

I was dead wrong.

I sat there, sans clothes except a shirt (I was about to take a bath), waiting for that crucial moment in which your rectum basically yells "OK GO GO GO", but that moment would not come. I could feel the brown monster swirling in my insides, getting closer and closer to the light as I got more and more nervios. "I hope it doesn't tear anything", I thought. Oh that would have been the last of my problems.

The decisive moment came. I felt the little push, the head of the monster was about to enter the light realm. But then disaster occured. I pushed, I pushed with all my might, and nothing happened.

The turd was too huge. The turd was too big to go through my anus.

So I started spreading my cheeks with my hands, rising my legs, moving sideways, I did everything I could to get the motherfucker out but it was all futile. I released my musscles and took a deep breath. This was going to be a long night.

After a slight retreat, the Turd Ov Hell came back to the portals of Heaven. This means war, I said to myself. Repeating the same movements and adding so much strenght I started to see little lights, I got a little piece of the motherfucker out. It was definitely as wide as my anus, so I figured that was the motherfucker's head. All I had to do is wrap my hand in toilet paper and help it down, like I had done so many times before.

Then disaster occured. When I reached what I assumed was the widest part of the monster, it broke, revealing it's true nature. The piece I got out was not it's head, it was barely it's nose, or somethgin similar. And the rest of the turd, I could feel, was hard as a fucking rock.

I started to freak out at this point. Sweating like crazy, throwing my shirt away, thinking of ways I could break this brown behemoth appart, and getting it out in chunks. I did the only thing I could do. I pushed. I gathered what little strenght I still had in me, and I pushed like there's no tomorrow.

At this time I was suffering what I like to call Shit-Induced Stress Madness (SISM), and started thinking to myself: Oh man. This is it. I am really going to die now. These are my last moments. What a fucking retarded way to die! What will the headlines say? "Man breaks his ass to death"? But I couldn't go back now, oh no, there was no way back.

So I was pushing and at the same time trying to break the shit into parts with my toiletpaperclad hand, but everytime I reached and tried to grab that wild animal, it retreated, forcing me to push more and more. And then it happened.

I blacked out. I seriously, honest to god, passed out.

I'm not sure how long I was out but it couldn't be more than 20 minutes. At this point the pain in my ass was unbearable, I was completely covered in sweat and was hyperventilating. I was more and more sure those were my last moments on Earth.

With what little strenght I had left, I started looking for stuff to put up my ass, in order to break the enemy from the inside. I tried using a cotton swab, but they wouldn't penetrate too deep and would bend whenever I tried to break the solid wall of the Evil Fortress. I wasn't going to give up easily. Not now. I inserted the upper part of a huge nail cutter (the part you have to turn around to use). It worker better but the damned torpedo would go up anyway.

I got desperated. I lost my sense of disgust. I decided to stick two fingers in there. One from each hand. But the motherfucker would slip, and I would only get little chunks out. While feeling it, I can assure you, it wasn't just solid, it was also sharp. It was no longer a turd. It was a monster, an angry, armored monster with claws ready to tear my insides appart.

I thought to myself, maybe if I get it wet it'll give in, so I dragged myself to the bidet (inb4 whatever this inspires you to say) and started spraying water up my ass, and sat there for a few minutes. All I managed to do was to pull the fucker upwards.

At this point,  I kid you not. I was completely defeated. I surrendered. I gathered what little strenght I had in me, and forced the fucker back up. I didn't care anymore, I wanted to take a shower and leave the fucking bathroom.

The monster is still inside of me. Waiting. Festering. Like a facehugger ready to come out of me tearing every little organ and tissue it encounters on it's way.


What do you think I should do? Should I get an enema? It was my first thought. Both my parents are doctors, I could give them a call and get a free enema. Has this happened to you? What have you done to solve the problem?
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline Callaway

  • Official Spokesperson for the Aspie Elite
  • Caretaker Admin
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 29267
  • Karma: 2488
  • Gender: Female
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #57 on: July 30, 2009, 05:39:32 PM »
^Is this a real story? 

If so, then the person has an impacted bowel movement and I think he probably should go to the emergency room.  I think that it has gone past enemas and he will need a manual disimpaction to dig out the hardened poop near the end, and they will probably put in an NG tube with magnesium citrate going directly into his stomach to get rid of the rest.  This could be very serious and he actually could die if he doesn't get help.

TheoK

  • Guest
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #58 on: July 30, 2009, 05:49:22 PM »
 :asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing:

Offline Callaway

  • Official Spokesperson for the Aspie Elite
  • Caretaker Admin
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 29267
  • Karma: 2488
  • Gender: Female
Re: Found baby rabbit
« Reply #59 on: July 30, 2009, 05:51:51 PM »
:asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing: :asthing:

 :lol:

I thought I was probably doing an :asthing:

However, just in case it was a real story, I thought I would let him know.