OK, now for what happened when I disappeared about an hour ago ...
It seems that it is my neighbor's birthday, today. (She is a majorly HAWT forty-something cougar type [settled down, these days, married well, I'd say], not at all interested in me, so let that shit go.) I heard a gaggle of loud feminine voices outside. What? YES! I went to investigate and intercepted this amazing entourage of middle aged (nah, fuck!! these were "meddle-aged" hawties) females in my front yard. I was almost in shock, then my neighbor spoke up from the center of the pack and I found a familiar reference. (GOOD GAWD!! WTF is going on!!)
She told me it was her birthday and she had gotten together with some old friends to celebrate, then she went off telling how she has told them all about me and my fabulous garden, then went through some rapid paced duty of introducing me to all of them. (OK, there is nothing I am going to gain here, but I CAN show off a bit, even with my clothes on). Well, fuck me (please?) I had no idea that her old friends (shuffling down the road, half drunk) looked better than any fucking cheerleading squad I had seen in recent times (trust me, I "look" at cheer leaders)!!
The only thing I could think of, after she rattled off all eleven of their names, was to remember their names and talk to each one, using each ones name (that was my showing off bit) as I walked a block along with them, completely surrounded by really hawt women, each of them asking about things that had nothing to do with my neighbor's birthday - GAWD!! Honestly, it is not that I got bored looking at tits half out, really well kept legs, tight-fitting ass-shorts or the promise of a tan line here and there, but, in all seriousness, what was I to do? Nothing, really. I just talked for a few minutes and had most of them intrigued by the fact that I had remembered each of their names, as my genuinely delectable neighbor said more than once, see I told you he was incredible.
If only... !!!
Seriously, IF ONLY ... uHm ... !!!
OK, I would die, right there on the street, if only ...
I was not tired of looking at tight shorts, tits half out, but what the hell was I going to do? The only way i could find to interact, even for a few minutes with this desirable bunch of (younger than I, too old for most of you, but GODDAMN!! beauties) was to talk. I had nothing to say. I wanted to dive in head first to the entire entourage, buck naked, but I only had my brain to work with, and after trying to make myself seem as capable of remembering shit, like very hawt women's names, I was done. I wished them well, hugged my neighbor and left with a promising half-hard on.
I said, "I hope to see you soon," but not to any one in particular, even though I was still touching my neighbor. It really would not matter which one or how many, for that matter. The growing tumescence was quite promising, from just talking.
I love it when that happens!