Last Meal

[DirtDawg]

Mine would be liver and onions over grits.

  I sometimes cook liver and onions at work!  You do the grits and your meal will be all set! 

Do you serve them with brown gravy made in the pan?

  Yes, I don't add flour, but I do mix the liver blood and the cooking butter to make a kind of gravy. 

Do not forget the mushrooms.

Mind you, if you are SURE that this is your LAST NEAL, then it really will not matter which mushrooms you choose, as long as they smell good. Timing might become an issue with some varieties, however.

Just go gather some little brown mushrooms from the garden and eat up. (you will have about a four hour trip, before your kidneys fail)
You will be in Seventh Heaven before you get to the First of Hell.

[Lestat]

That is utter bovine fecal matter about the little brown mushrooms.

Utter, fucking, steaming piles of dog-originating hershey squirt biomaterial, dribbling with greasy, odious gobbets of diseased muslim spunk.

There are three primary causes of kidney failure in terms of toxic mushrooms and NONE are little brown lawn growers.

The main guilty party is the genus Cortinarius, the webcaps, in particular, a cluster of them within the subgenus Dermocybe (I THINK its dermocybe, been a while since I read any taxonomy textbooks on the genus Cortinarius), comprising C.spessiosissimus (try saying that name as quickly as possible on PCP or ket. The end result would sound hilarious to no end:D)

As well as C.semisanguineus, C.bolaris (possibly), C.limonius and C.orellanus.

One of those, either C.orellanus (oral anus? hahaha:P) or C.spessiosissimus was, a few decades ago, responsible for a mass poisoning epidemic in poland.

Quite a lot of people died miserably.

Trivia: most if not all of the subgenus Dermocybe, in the genus Cortinarius contain beta-carboline alkaloids that make the fungi fluoresce under UV ligh.

The toxins, orellanine and orellaninin are structurally quite similar to the toxic herbicide paraquat, based on a bipyridyl backbone and act as kidney fucking nephrotoxins. They are however, extremely slow in action, sometimes people will not begin to experience signs of poisoning until as long as three weeks to one month after consuming the webcaps. Upon which, the orellanine starts to wreak bloody havoc amongst the tubules of the kidneys. A kidney transplant is likely to be needed if a person be poisoned with these fungi.

It would be slow and excruciatingly painful as a way to die, and definitely, definitely, absograndmothersodomizing-bastarding-lutely way too slow to cheat the hangman.

Unless they were to be mixed in THEIR meal of course

The other nephrotoxic fungi are a couple of species in the genus Amanita, mainly A.smithiana and A.proxima. Prognosis of a poisoning equal in scale to the corts would very likely prove better than webcap poisoning.  It is of a much, much more rapid onset, as do the other similar nephrotoxic Amanitas in the stirps Lepidella, the principle toxins being allenic norleucine, and chlorocrotylglycine.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_sphaerobulbosa
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_smithiana

The other two fungi I can see causing acute kidney failure, are Tricholoma equestre, the knight on horseback, prized as an edible species, but it is indeed poisonous, multiple meals of the mushroom allow for the toxins to build up in-vivo until they can start doing harm. The kidney damage would be indirect, as along with a Russula species, R.subnigricans, they contain compounds that cause rhabdomyolysis (breakdown of muscle tissue)

The kidneys cannot cope with that kind of debris, and the tissue breakdown products start poisoning them. IIRC Russula subnigricans is quite a long way ahead of the mounted knight in terms of toxicity.


DirtDawg, please refrain from posting false information when it does or could relate to health and life. If in doubt, either stay silent upon the matter, or consult me, I will most likely know what the score is.

[Jack]

Why would it be messy?

 

Maybe the better question would be, why would it be any more messy than any other food? Any differently messy.

[bodie]

A vindaloo is notorious (here) as a ring burner.  Gives you the shits. 

[Jack]

That doesn't explain the pickles.

[DirtDawg]

That is utter bovine fecal matter about the little brown mushrooms.

Utter, fucking, steaming piles of dog-originating hershey squirt biomaterial, dribbling with greasy, odious gobbets of diseased muslim spunk.

There are three primary causes of kidney failure in terms of toxic mushrooms and NONE are little brown lawn growers.

The main guilty party is the genus Cortinarius, the webcaps, in particular, a cluster of them within the subgenus Dermocybe (I THINK its dermocybe, been a while since I read any taxonomy textbooks on the genus Cortinarius), comprising C.spessiosissimus (try saying that name as quickly as possible on PCP or ket. The end result would sound hilarious to no end:D)

As well as C.semisanguineus, C.bolaris (possibly), C.limonius and C.orellanus.

One of those, either C.orellanus (oral anus? hahaha:P) or C.spessiosissimus was, a few decades ago, responsible for a mass poisoning epidemic in poland.

Quite a lot of people died miserably.

Trivia: most if not all of the subgenus Dermocybe, in the genus Cortinarius contain beta-carboline alkaloids that make the fungi fluoresce under UV ligh.

The toxins, orellanine and orellaninin are structurally quite similar to the toxic herbicide paraquat, based on a bipyridyl backbone and act as kidney fucking nephrotoxins. They are however, extremely slow in action, sometimes people will not begin to experience signs of poisoning until as long as three weeks to one month after consuming the webcaps. Upon which, the orellanine starts to wreak bloody havoc amongst the tubules of the kidneys. A kidney transplant is likely to be needed if a person be poisoned with these fungi.

It would be slow and excruciatingly painful as a way to die, and definitely, definitely, absograndmothersodomizing-bastarding-lutely way too slow to cheat the hangman.

Unless they were to be mixed in THEIR meal of course

The other nephrotoxic fungi are a couple of species in the genus Amanita, mainly A.smithiana and A.proxima. Prognosis of a poisoning equal in scale to the corts would very likely prove better than webcap poisoning.  It is of a much, much more rapid onset, as do the other similar nephrotoxic Amanitas in the stirps Lepidella, the principle toxins being allenic norleucine, and chlorocrotylglycine.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_sphaerobulbosa
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_smithiana

The other two fungi I can see causing acute kidney failure, are Tricholoma equestre, the knight on horseback, prized as an edible species, but it is indeed poisonous, multiple meals of the mushroom allow for the toxins to build up in-vivo until they can start doing harm. The kidney damage would be indirect, as along with a Russula species, R.subnigricans, they contain compounds that cause rhabdomyolysis (breakdown of muscle tissue)

The kidneys cannot cope with that kind of debris, and the tissue breakdown products start poisoning them. IIRC Russula subnigricans is quite a long way ahead of the mounted knight in terms of toxicity.


DirtDawg, please refrain from posting false information when it does or could relate to health and life. If in doubt, either stay silent upon the matter, or consult me, I will most likely know what the score is.

While there may be a great deal of current science within your post, I have to say that the four "Mushrooming Field Guides" I own, all of which are designed to keep one safe while attempting to identify edible mushrooms in the wild, ALL directly contradict your asserted biochemical knowledge.

I have no doubt that you and I can each kill any kind of animal with suitable poisons, BUT I trust my extensive study of "what is safe to eat and what can cause you harm" is as advanced as your studies of how to attempt to fuck people over and make then feel insecure online.

I can tell you that I have had many years ( about forty, now) of mushrooming in the wild under my belt, and my books have never let me down. I do not pretend to know everything, much, but I have never been poisoned when I followed my guides.

I also accept that my basic books are simply basic and when they talk about alkaloid poisons destroying ones kidneys, they do not specify which specific chemicals are responsible in causing harm or death, nor do they talk about how one could possibly survive. The means of death described are generally associated with the entire liver and kidney systems becoming overloaded with so a high level of alkaloids that in a relatively short time, the body succumbs to the overload.

NOW, back to the main point.  This thread is totally full of bullshit, from all sides and one form does not intrude upon another, mostly. Having one poster make more bullshit than another is a call for challenge, I agree, but are you seriously going to tell me that LBMs are "safe to eat,"  or some other nonsense, just to show off your extensive knowledge of biochemistry??

... AND just to bring my main point back to light,  if ones last meal included poisonous mushrooms one would experience a few hours of non-boredome, just before passing out and taking ones place beside the executioner. While ice cream may be very enjoyable, we have all had plenty. BUT, ingesting something that would disrupt ones normal function, might help to alleviate the horror of being put to death.

 
I was merely carrying along with the theme of the thread and I will continue once I begin to talk about Oleander and I will see you there.

[renaeden]

I would like a plate of enchiladas the way Ceilidh makes them, followed by strawberry wave ice cream.

[bodie]

You can get pills that give you a tanned look,  allegedly.  So you could request a load of them and put them in your last meal.  Then as you stand there before the executioner, all orange-ey just puff your cheeks out, and in your very best ooompah loompah voice say  " you got the wrong person boss"

Hey presto you could be shipped off to the chocolate factory in no time where you could live the rest of your life gorging on that chocolate fountain and chobbling gob stoppers.


ta- daaa what a plan!

 

[Lestat]

Never said it was safe to eat LBMs, well, some of them are, although there are a few rather nasty ones certainly.

I've found Conocybe filaris, and Galerina spp. growing right amongst a woodchip bed I seeded with spawn of Psilocybe cyanescens, little bastards both contain the same toxins found in the death cap and destroying angels, luckily I spore print each and every single mushroom I pick from any of my grows, the Psilocybes have a dark violet-black print, whereas with Galerina and Conocybe, the spore color is tan brown. Doing that keeps me safe, and additionally, provides more spores, with which to breed more infested wood chips so I can go and seed more patches and grow more shrooms

Both the liver destroying cyclopeptide toxins (amatoxins, found in Amanita spp, Galerina, Conocybe, and possibly also in sulfur tuft [Hypholoma fasiculare] and nephrotoxins [orellanine, found in Cortinarius spp. and those novel aminoacids found in some other Amanita spp.] take a long time to take effect, 8-12 hours before first symptoms are likely to show in the case of amatoxin poisoning, in the case of orellanine, it can take as long as a whole month before anything untoward gets noticed, the amino-acid toxins in the other Amanitas are somewhat faster acting]

In any case, its a slow, horribly painful, excruciating way to die. Nasty, nasty way to go.


With amatoxins, first signs occur in 8-12 hours post ingestion, and consist of bloody diarrhea, vomiting, agonizing stomach pains,  progressing to raised liver enzyme profile, then frank liver failure, sometimes the kidneys go too, then hepatic encepalopathy, coma, and death. Its slow, very slow, and very painful. Not a way I'd like to go.

Didn't know you were a mushroom hunter. I'm going out hiking on tuesday, hoping to find something tasty to bring home. Pretty sure I've found where some ergot (Claviceps purpurea) grows just near my place. Going to go out in a bit and harvest it. I've been doing a ton of research into mutagen treatment of cultures to create a productive strain, culture conditions, nutrient requirements etc. and techniques to stabilize the strain by immobilization in alginate polymer, spiked with polyflurocarbons to act as oxygen transport facilitators.

Going to build myself a series of bubble-column and stirred tank bioreactors to compare the two setups under otherwise identical conditions and see which yields the highest quantity of ergotamine.

It will be a hell of a challenge, to go all the way from an ergot culture, right through to designer analogs of acid. I just want to see if I can succeed in doing it from scratch.

[Semicolon]

You can get pills that give you a tanned look,  allegedly.  So you could request a load of them and put them in your last meal.  Then as you stand there before the executioner, all orange-ey just puff your cheeks out, and in your very best ooompah loompah voice say  " you got the wrong person boss"

Hey presto you could be shipped off to the chocolate factory in no time where you could live the rest of your life gorging on that chocolate fountain and chobbling gob stoppers.


ta- daaa what a plan!

 

Eat a lot of carrots.

["couldbecousin"]

  Seedless raspberry jam and marshmallow fluff on fluffy white bread, with a chocolate milkshake.
  Go to the chair in diabetic shock and you won't feel a thing.  Float into eternity on a cloud of spun sugar!