INTENSITY²

Start here => Free For ALL => Topic started by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 02, 2008, 07:17:13 PM

Title: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 02, 2008, 07:17:13 PM
Okay, just thought this would be fun. Since this is a no-holds-barred, non-Marquess-of-Queensberry-Rules sort of brouhaha, I figured while we're throwing loving insults at one another we may as well work on technique. After all, haven't we all felt the rosy red cheeks of shame when somebody completely flabbergasts us with a brilliant insult and all we can think to say in return is something to the effect of, "Oh yeah? Well... fuck you too!"  ::)

So why not? Insult the person above you, using no profanity, preferably no personal low-digs (we want to practice technique, not create enemies-- I mean, unless you REALLY want to, in which case nobody can stop you), and be as creative as possible.

The aim of each of your posts should win you at least one of these:  :plus:

And if you do end up using profanity or making any really low digs, ideally you should get one of these instead:  :minusevil:

So make it good, and come out fighting!

Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 02, 2008, 08:27:54 PM
If I was the doctor that performed the act of birthing you, I would have slapped your mother severly and said 'if I catch you doing that again I will commit you to the nearest asylum for the clinically insane'.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: bob on August 02, 2008, 08:33:39 PM
The eyes are open, the mouth moves, but Mr. Brain has long since departed, eh Chosen One?
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 02, 2008, 08:41:02 PM
What do you call a life-buoy? Bob.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Callaway on August 03, 2008, 01:44:59 AM
^ has MENSA envy.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2008, 02:26:52 AM
^ wishes they were The Chosen One, but as the position is taken, will just have to settle for.... wait for it... loser/
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Al Swearegen on August 03, 2008, 07:13:46 AM
May the fleas of a thousand camels feast upon your backside.  ;)
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2008, 07:20:37 AM
Your shout, grumpy; so get to the bar or else.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: enronh on August 03, 2008, 07:23:31 AM
^ may all your itches be unreachable  :laugh:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 03, 2008, 05:00:05 PM
May all your unreachable itches then be feasted upon by the fleas of a thousand camels. And may the bones of all your camels in India be made into cursed chess pieces, with which the owner (being you) may never win a single game. (If you happen to play chess that is. If not, then may you just be really really itchy.  :green: )
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Silk on August 03, 2008, 05:34:40 PM
You watch The Simple Life. Feel the burn!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2008, 05:47:25 PM
You once auditioned for American Idol. Funny thing was, you were accepted as American Idiot.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Silk on August 03, 2008, 05:59:43 PM
Donald Duck plays the piano better than you do.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2008, 06:12:46 PM
May the X button on your PS2 fail just as you are about to make that critical jump and your game locks.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Silk on August 03, 2008, 06:16:56 PM
May the X button on your PS2 fail just as you are about to make that critical jump and your game locks.

That is just plain mean.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 03, 2008, 06:45:43 PM
May the X button on your PS2 fail just as you are about to make that critical jump and your game locks.

That is just plain mean.

And may you spill orange juice all over your console.  :laugh:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Silk on August 03, 2008, 06:54:06 PM
May the X button on your PS2 fail just as you are about to make that critical jump and your game locks.

That is just plain mean.

And may you spill orange juice all over your console.  :laugh:

I hope a cat pees on your console.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Nocturnalist! on August 03, 2008, 07:04:34 PM
If there is a bright centre to the Aspie Universe, that member is the farthest from it ;)
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Silk on August 03, 2008, 07:14:12 PM
If there is a bright centre to the Aspie Universe, that member is the farthest from it ;)

In my case, that would a compliment. I like lingering in the outer edges of dark chaos while watching others falter and stumble in the glaring core of existence.

Oh, your mother wears combat boots.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2008, 08:15:13 PM
May your video player chew up your favourite tape, your DVD self destruct and your computer melt-down on boot-up......

All at the same time.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 04, 2008, 07:34:33 AM
May your video player chew up your favourite tape, your DVD self destruct and your computer melt-down on boot-up......

All at the same time.

Actually, I think that's already happened once or twice, lol.

Insult: You know you really should stay out of the dairy section. Cheese is not an appropriate alternative to deodorant.  :poop:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: enronh on August 04, 2008, 10:39:53 AM
You're so large when you jumped in the pool the splash could be seen from space and you needed a skateboard to get back out out
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: odeon on August 04, 2008, 03:22:31 PM
You once auditioned for American Idol. Funny thing was, you were accepted as American Idiot.

You got in there too. It's a very large village.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: odeon on August 04, 2008, 03:23:02 PM
May the X button on your PS2 fail just as you are about to make that critical jump and your game locks.

That is just plain mean.

And may you spill orange juice all over your console.  :laugh:

And Coca Cola on your keyboard.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: odeon on August 04, 2008, 03:23:39 PM
If there is a bright centre to the Aspie Universe, that member is the farthest from it ;)

It's that Dopler guy, isn't it? Or Alex Plank.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 04, 2008, 07:10:06 PM
Yo mama's so fat that when she tries to use a compass it points to her head!  :zoinks:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 04, 2008, 07:36:34 PM
Was that you who I saw as the new exhibit in the gorilla cage at the zoo last night? No? That's right, gorillas have some sort of intelligence.....
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 04, 2008, 09:43:05 PM
Was that you who I saw as the new exhibit in the gorilla cage at the zoo last night? No? That's right, gorillas have some sort of intelligence.....

No, it was yo mama!  :eyebrows:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Alex179 on August 04, 2008, 09:51:24 PM
Can't tie their shoes without drooling all over themselves.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 04, 2008, 09:52:56 PM
Can't tie their shoes without drooling all over themselves.

^ Can't tie their shoes.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Alex179 on August 04, 2008, 10:18:15 PM
^Can't put their feet in shoes to begin with, they are too deformed.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Nocturnalist! on August 04, 2008, 10:50:53 PM
^ A Doctor has taken his laces away.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Alex179 on August 04, 2008, 10:52:30 PM
^ A Doctor has taken his laces away.
It happened in the mental hospital when I was on suicide watch lol.

^ Enjoys eating their own fecal matter.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Nocturnalist! on August 05, 2008, 08:16:01 AM
^ Oi! Give me back my lunch!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The Member Formerly Known As Sophist on August 05, 2008, 08:32:19 AM
^ Is a vampire with dentures.  >:D
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: punkdrew on September 01, 2008, 03:28:55 AM
^is a filthy pragmatist
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: klox on September 01, 2008, 05:31:10 AM
^ has a beetroot addiction.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on September 01, 2008, 05:35:32 PM
^ Chelsea supporter!!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: vodz on September 02, 2008, 12:29:47 AM
Why do Queenslanders drink XXXX (four x)? they can't spell "beer". :P

(http://img3.travelblog.org/Photos/31250/158174/t/1143749-XXXX-Tour-0.jpg)

Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on September 07, 2008, 02:11:58 AM
^ shares the first name of a pop star who has been responsible for some of the most inane songs of modern times... :lol:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Lucifer on September 07, 2008, 04:49:45 AM
^ would completely confound the Genome Project.

:P
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: duncvis on September 10, 2008, 06:08:03 AM
^ secretly shops at Asda, votes Conservative, and has half a cow in her freezer.  :evillaugh:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on September 10, 2008, 06:54:55 AM
^ Trained to be a gymnast for the Olympics....

The Winter Olympics
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Gluey on September 14, 2008, 12:04:29 PM
Has a mother that is so fat she uses a microwave as a beeper and caused all those tsunami's in the east from jumping off the pacific coast in California.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: enronh on September 15, 2008, 02:13:23 PM
^ secretly shops at Asda, votes Conservative, and has half a cow in her freezer.  :evillaugh:

                  ..and drives a Range Rover Sport.  :laugh:


^is not worthy of my insults
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Gluey on September 15, 2008, 06:06:42 PM
opppps nevermind double post
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Gluey on September 15, 2008, 08:19:30 PM
^

That's where my rat went!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Gluey on September 15, 2008, 08:20:36 PM
I insulted myself.......by accident  :hahaha:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: DirtDawg on September 16, 2008, 05:18:40 AM

^trims her rat's hair into a moptop
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Leto729 on September 16, 2008, 07:15:01 AM
Is a dirty dawg.^
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: DirtDawg on September 16, 2008, 07:58:08 AM

^ the seven hundred thirtieth reason he is NOT a spazz gets him every time.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Gluey on September 22, 2008, 09:05:11 PM
^ Forgot to take his meds and developed a fear of Spokane Girl and anything do do with Spokane and ended up on Maury show.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Callaway on September 22, 2008, 10:52:52 PM
^ Is the producer for the Maury show.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: DirtDawg on September 23, 2008, 11:57:44 AM


^appeals to the producer, cuz she has the hots for Maury's guests.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: enronh on September 23, 2008, 02:42:19 PM
^Was Demi Moore's pole-dancing coach for the film 'Striptease'
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: duncvis on September 24, 2008, 03:15:48 AM
^ is Chris Moyles's pole dancing coach
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Nocturnalist! on September 24, 2008, 09:44:01 AM
^ is Chris Moyles' pole.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Blasted on September 24, 2008, 09:46:15 AM
^strokes his pole to the sound of George Bush's speeches.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Nocturnalist! on September 24, 2008, 09:48:46 AM
^Convinced George Bush that it should be pronounced 'noo-cue-lar'.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: vodz on September 24, 2008, 11:19:07 AM
^Fucking scum-buggered cuntstain with a gaping arsehole for a face.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: odeon on September 24, 2008, 02:44:21 PM
^doesn't know what "profanity" means
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: enronh on September 25, 2008, 10:51:34 AM
^ Is ProFannyTee and AuntyDickCoffey
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: vodz on September 25, 2008, 09:28:48 PM
^doesn't know what "profanity" means

Can't you read? You're not supposed to use that word!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: DirtDawg on September 25, 2008, 10:59:02 PM
^doesn't know what "profanity" means

Can't you read? You're not supposed to use that word!

 :laugh:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Squidusa on July 08, 2011, 10:53:56 AM
^ is the biggest bitch I have ever met....... as in the female of his species.  :zoinks:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: midlifeaspie on July 08, 2011, 11:57:13 AM
^ is the biggest bitch I have ever met....... as in the female of his species.  :zoinks:

^  Is a member of the class Cephalopoda, subclass Coleoidea, order Teuthida.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: 'andersom' on July 08, 2011, 02:17:28 PM
^ missed the episode where the Mythbusters explained women can't get pregnant by squids, and it made him really insecure.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on July 08, 2011, 05:41:18 PM
^ Has a secret passion for Dr Crabblesnitch.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Scrapheap on July 08, 2011, 09:37:02 PM
^ Fucking fuckiest fuck who ever fucked a fucking fucker in the fucking history of fucking.

I've never been one to play by the rules.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Trigger 11 on July 24, 2011, 11:28:07 AM
Doesn't know how to read, which explains a lot!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Tommy Johnson on July 25, 2011, 10:37:44 PM
^ I could lose my security clearance!
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Trigger 11 on July 25, 2011, 11:14:24 PM
Has a brain that can only process basic auto functions to keep him breathing and his heart beating.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Al Swearegen on July 25, 2011, 11:38:37 PM
So many posts over so many years and ultimately so little worth reading

(Joking Trigger I like your posts. I felt like writing something nasty and you were silly enough to post here)  :asthing:
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Tommy Johnson on July 25, 2011, 11:50:57 PM
So many posts over so many years and ultimately so little worth reading

(Joking Trigger I like your posts. I felt like writing something nasty and you were silly enough to post here)  :asthing:
dwarf

Has a brain that can only process basic auto functions to keep him breathing and his heart beating.
I lost my security guard clearance at the us government aka best buy
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on July 26, 2011, 12:33:12 AM
So many posts over so many years and ultimately so little worth reading

(Joking Trigger I like your posts. I felt like writing something nasty and you were silly enough to post here)  :asthing:
dwarf

Has a brain that can only process basic auto functions to keep him breathing and his heart beating.
I lost my security guard clearance at the us government aka best buy

^ Saw something on the footpath after a dog had passed by and said 'Mama? Is that you?'
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Tommy Johnson on July 26, 2011, 12:45:29 AM
Your "You mama" jokes are awful
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on July 26, 2011, 12:50:57 AM
^ Is so bad at trolling even the Billy Goats Gruff gave him wedgies.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Trigger 11 on August 01, 2011, 11:25:17 PM
Seeks conflict even when an easier path presents itself.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: Repent on August 02, 2011, 04:26:57 PM
Intercouse you.
Title: Re: Insult the Person Above You without Using Profanity
Post by: The_Chosen_One on August 03, 2011, 03:04:47 AM
Would take a comparison with a starfish as a compliment.