Author Topic: Your perfect mate  (Read 2546 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Binty

  • Guest
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #60 on: October 29, 2011, 08:00:34 PM »
I'd let you squirt on my tits  8)

Offline Trigger 11

  • Dark Jedi Master
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8747
  • Karma: 438
  • May the FORCE be with you...always!!!
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #61 on: October 29, 2011, 08:02:18 PM »
Ohhh my am I really, really horny right now! When is the next flight out of Dulles?
Crazy, I'm halfway to crazy
Suicide would waste me
Homicide would break me
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Oh, is life as bad as dreams
I guess that's just the way it seems

Offline Trigger 11

  • Dark Jedi Master
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8747
  • Karma: 438
  • May the FORCE be with you...always!!!
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #62 on: October 29, 2011, 08:03:54 PM »
I'd let you squirt on my tits  8)

 :2thumbsup:
Crazy, I'm halfway to crazy
Suicide would waste me
Homicide would break me
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Oh, is life as bad as dreams
I guess that's just the way it seems

Offline bodie

  • Reflective Katoptronaphiliac of the Aspie Elite
  • News Box Slave
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14394
  • Karma: 2113
  • Gender: Female
  • busy re arranging deck chairs on board the Titanic
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #63 on: October 29, 2011, 08:10:01 PM »
are you really COMING?  i could pick you up from the airport.  Binty could
sit in the back with you and show you the sites
and i could observe in the rear view mirror

I have a lovely chauffeur's  cap,  and a roomy Mercedes :eyebrows:
blah blah blah

Binty

  • Guest
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #64 on: October 29, 2011, 08:12:56 PM »
and a roomy Mercedes :eyebrows:

That is no way to talk about your vagina!

Binty

  • Guest
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #65 on: October 29, 2011, 08:14:54 PM »
It should be at least a tight, five star Rolls Royce  :thumbup:

Offline bodie

  • Reflective Katoptronaphiliac of the Aspie Elite
  • News Box Slave
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14394
  • Karma: 2113
  • Gender: Female
  • busy re arranging deck chairs on board the Titanic
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #66 on: October 29, 2011, 08:18:55 PM »
It should be at least a tight, five star Rolls Royce  :thumbup:

its more like a showroom model actually,  rarely used! :zoinks:

i do drive a merc,  a big silver 3ltre turbo diesel mo fo!

but i lied about the chauffeur hat
blah blah blah

Offline Trigger 11

  • Dark Jedi Master
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8747
  • Karma: 438
  • May the FORCE be with you...always!!!
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #67 on: October 29, 2011, 08:20:25 PM »
I am cumming alright!!!! You two have me all worked up I have to relieve some pressure!
Crazy, I'm halfway to crazy
Suicide would waste me
Homicide would break me
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Oh, is life as bad as dreams
I guess that's just the way it seems

Offline bodie

  • Reflective Katoptronaphiliac of the Aspie Elite
  • News Box Slave
  • Maniacal Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 14394
  • Karma: 2113
  • Gender: Female
  • busy re arranging deck chairs on board the Titanic
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #68 on: October 29, 2011, 08:26:59 PM »
I was going to say  "get a grip, man"

 :angel:  anyway we aren't teasing
it's your fault,  you and your innuendo

made me say bad things :'(
blah blah blah

eris

  • Guest
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #69 on: October 29, 2011, 08:34:25 PM »
you guys are even making ME blush :P

Offline Trigger 11

  • Dark Jedi Master
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8747
  • Karma: 438
  • May the FORCE be with you...always!!!
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #70 on: October 29, 2011, 08:36:52 PM »
You are welcome to join in! I for one am still going! :headbang2:
Crazy, I'm halfway to crazy
Suicide would waste me
Homicide would break me
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Tongue tied and tied to the tongue
Oh, is life as bad as dreams
I guess that's just the way it seems

Offline Zippo

  • psychotic J-DAM of the aspie elite
  • Elder
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2055
  • Karma: 253
  • Gender: Female
  • Click, Click, BOOM!
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #71 on: October 29, 2011, 10:56:09 PM »
trigger 11



skip to 55 seconds in, that is where i dedicate this to you.

                                                         Zippo, Shotgun Surgeon.
if theres bees in the trap im catching them, by the thorax and abdomen. and sanding there stingers down to a rough quill. then i dip em in ink and i scribble a bit, and if the wriggle than i tickle them until they hold still, let me say it again, in my land of pretend, i use bees as a mother fucking pen!

Offline ZEGH8578

  • Idealist Nihilist Socialist Primitivist Anarchist
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7548
  • Karma: 492
  • Gender: Male
  • NTWADUMELA
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #72 on: October 30, 2011, 12:43:36 AM »
yes,  the main tips i can give you are as follows:

*foreplay is NOT two cans of lager and a bag of chips

*Nipples,  go easy in that area and remember you are
not trying to tune in radio Luxemburg!

*Don't wipe your nob on the curtains afterwards  :LOL:

even in my frustratingly virginous teens, i was always baffled at the "pointers" people would give me, "for when the time comes". "dont bite her pussy! they really dont like that!"
i mean, wtf...
why not throw in "dont punch her in the throat! dont shit on her while making out! dont try to lift her by her tits!"
wtf are people doing!?

Offline "couldbecousin"

  • Invincible Heisenweeble of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Postwhore Beyond Teh Stupid
  • *****
  • Posts: 53577
  • Karma: 2716
  • Gender: Female
  • You're goddamn right.
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #73 on: October 30, 2011, 01:08:56 AM »
and a roomy Mercedes :eyebrows:

That is no way to talk about your vagina!

  :evilplus:  for an awesome punchline!  That was a complete surprise to me!  :rofl:
"I'm finding a lot of things funny lately, but I don't think they are."
--- Ripley, Alien Resurrection


"We are grateful for the time we have been given."
--- Edward Walker, The Village

People forget.
--- The Who, "Eminence Front"

Offline El

  • Unofficial Weird News Reporter of the Aspie Elite
  • News Box Slave
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 21926
  • Karma: 2615
Re: Your perfect mate
« Reply #74 on: October 30, 2011, 06:08:14 AM »
Perfect isn't out there.
I was right.  But, there's damn-near.  'tis a goal of mine at this point not to commit to less.
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.