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Author Topic: Speaking of crimes  (Read 367 times)

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Offline Calandale

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Speaking of crimes
« on: January 18, 2008, 08:02:48 PM »
Had too much to drink last night.
There's blood on my bathroom floor,
and on my wall. I can't find an injury
to account for it. ???

Offline maldoror

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2008, 08:03:22 PM »
Who was speaking of crimes!
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline Peter

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2008, 08:10:13 PM »
Had too much to drink last night.
There's blood on my bathroom floor,
and on my wall. I can't find an injury
to account for it. ???

Obviously you got a hooker while she was on her period, grabbed her by her hair and spun her around above your head.
Quote
14:10 - Moarskrillex42: She said something about knowing why I wanted to move to Glasgow when she came in. She plopped down on my bed and told me to go ahead and open it for her.

14:11 - Peter5930: So, she thought I was your lover and that I was sending you a box full of sex toys, and that you wanted to move to Glasgow to be with me?

Offline Calandale

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2008, 08:14:23 PM »
Wouldn't there be other traces?

Offline Calandale

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2008, 12:00:47 AM »
Mystery solved. I'm having my period.

Offline Peter

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #5 on: January 19, 2008, 01:10:13 AM »
Mystery solved. I'm having my period.

And the hooker spun you around by your hair?
Quote
14:10 - Moarskrillex42: She said something about knowing why I wanted to move to Glasgow when she came in. She plopped down on my bed and told me to go ahead and open it for her.

14:11 - Peter5930: So, she thought I was your lover and that I was sending you a box full of sex toys, and that you wanted to move to Glasgow to be with me?

Offline maldoror

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #6 on: January 19, 2008, 01:10:58 AM »
Mystery solved. I'm having my period.

MALEs can't have PERIODS!  :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :eyebrows:
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline Calandale

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #7 on: January 19, 2008, 01:14:38 AM »
Mystery solved. I'm having my period.

And the hooker spun you around by your hair?

No. must've had blood on my hands.

Mystery solved. I'm having my period.

MALEs can't have PERIODS!  :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :eyebrows:

Yeah. That's what kept me from considering the
obvious. BUT, I have been PMSing. I suspect I've
just been slow to develop.

Offline maldoror

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2008, 01:16:27 AM »
It's more likely you carved out a ditch where your genitals used to be.
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline Calandale

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #9 on: January 19, 2008, 01:17:57 AM »
No. They're still there.

duncvis

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #10 on: January 19, 2008, 04:49:33 AM »
burst yer arsegrapes?

Offline Parts

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #11 on: January 19, 2008, 08:37:10 AM »
Did you check under your bed for a body?
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

Kosmonaut

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #12 on: January 19, 2008, 08:45:54 AM »
I woke up one day last week and couldn't find my glasses. After an hour of searching I found them underneath the settee; they were bent out of shape. I also headbutted the wall in my sleep that night. I blame Sigur Ros, i had been watching their DVD again, I am going to avoid watching it again for a week or so.

Offline Calandale

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Re: Speaking of crimes
« Reply #13 on: January 19, 2008, 01:06:39 PM »
Did you check under your bed for a body?

I don't use a bed.
But, the cops haven't
come for me, so I'm probably
safe on that count.