Author Topic: Let's make a surreal story.  (Read 585 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Let's make a surreal story.
« on: November 10, 2007, 04:20:14 PM »
Each person contribute the next sentence. I'll start, because I am first.

I bolted upright in bed to the sound of an angry blue squash banging a pitchfork against my window and asking for seconds.
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline SovaNu

  • astralanes
  • .
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 19359
  • Karma: 796
  • Gender: Female
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #1 on: November 10, 2007, 04:22:47 PM »
it wanted porridge, i deducted and gave him my dirty underwear to sniff!
"I think everybody has an asshole component to their personality. It's just a matter of how much you indulge it. Those who do it often form a habit. So like any addiction, you have to learn to overcome it."
~Lord Phlexor

"Sometimes stepping on one's own dick is a memorable learning experience."
~PPK

"We are all the sum of our tears. Too little and the ground is not fertile and nothing can grow there; too much, the best of us is washed away."
~Gkar

:blonde:

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #2 on: November 10, 2007, 04:28:01 PM »
Suddenly, he stopped. This had happened before, and we both knew it. It was at this point that the pair of underwear started shrieking that we had burned the hash browns at a volume so loud that my ears exploded, sending candy flying everywhere. I had always suspected they had been pinatas.
!!Super atomic enema!!

duncvis

  • Guest
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #3 on: November 10, 2007, 05:06:37 PM »
It appears he had heard a flock of toasters approaching over the brow of yonder hill, enraged by the scent of burning conducted by one not initiated in to the Guild of Toasters and other Starch Heating Implements, and fled in terror of their fusion wrath.

Offline SovaNu

  • astralanes
  • .
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 19359
  • Karma: 796
  • Gender: Female
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #4 on: November 10, 2007, 05:31:45 PM »
Toasters! Toasters! it screamed as the flailing hail fell down upon him, enveloping him in snow.
"I think everybody has an asshole component to their personality. It's just a matter of how much you indulge it. Those who do it often form a habit. So like any addiction, you have to learn to overcome it."
~Lord Phlexor

"Sometimes stepping on one's own dick is a memorable learning experience."
~PPK

"We are all the sum of our tears. Too little and the ground is not fertile and nothing can grow there; too much, the best of us is washed away."
~Gkar

:blonde:

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #5 on: November 10, 2007, 06:54:22 PM »
Upon coming into contact with the first drop of snow, the flock of toasters became one long chain of short-circuiting airborn kitchen appliances, filling the noon sky with its radiant blue tinged electrical glow. A bolt of lightning who had planned on striking nearby become jealous and challenged the toasters to a duel.
!!Super atomic enema!!

duncvis

  • Guest
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #6 on: November 10, 2007, 06:56:49 PM »
Unfortunately, the lightning was distracted by a passing golfer, allowing the enraged flying bread-burners to pass by unchecked - to the chagrin of a haughty coffee maker, which considered itself Above This Kind Of Thing.

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #7 on: November 11, 2007, 12:06:40 AM »
However, the incident left its mark on the notoriously insecure lightning bolt who developed a full fledged identity crisis soon after, which resulted in the electrocution of some 50 people working in the office building that housed the therapist to whom it went to seek treatment. The incident made the papers when it came to pass that instead of dying, all those present in the building morphed into badly faked versions of famous Italian Renaissance works which then attempted to fly south for the winter, unaware of the fact that they were actually hurling themselves into outer space which had been proven to cause damage to oil paintings.
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline SovaNu

  • astralanes
  • .
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 19359
  • Karma: 796
  • Gender: Female
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #8 on: November 11, 2007, 01:29:25 AM »
the oil paintings came back and wore diapers and drove a car.
"I think everybody has an asshole component to their personality. It's just a matter of how much you indulge it. Those who do it often form a habit. So like any addiction, you have to learn to overcome it."
~Lord Phlexor

"Sometimes stepping on one's own dick is a memorable learning experience."
~PPK

"We are all the sum of our tears. Too little and the ground is not fertile and nothing can grow there; too much, the best of us is washed away."
~Gkar

:blonde:

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #9 on: November 11, 2007, 01:43:41 AM »
But then suddenly the car was wearing the diaper and driving them. AND then the diaper was driving the car and wearing an oil painting OH GOD MAKE IT STOP IT HURTS SO MUCH IT ISN'T RIGHT. Suddenly jesus appeared and handed out popsicles PLEASE RELEASE ME FROM THIS HELL I WANT TO LIVE DAMMIT
!!Super atomic enema!!

Offline SovaNu

  • astralanes
  • .
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 19359
  • Karma: 796
  • Gender: Female
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #10 on: November 11, 2007, 12:39:34 PM »
Jesus woke up in a hospital bed. he knew because it was blue. the windows here barred. he thought, oh jesus, this is it. the nut house. i wasn't the son of god? oh god, why didn't i listen to Judas! he was right all along. :'( but he was just a figment of my imagionation. figs FIGS i want some figs!
"I think everybody has an asshole component to their personality. It's just a matter of how much you indulge it. Those who do it often form a habit. So like any addiction, you have to learn to overcome it."
~Lord Phlexor

"Sometimes stepping on one's own dick is a memorable learning experience."
~PPK

"We are all the sum of our tears. Too little and the ground is not fertile and nothing can grow there; too much, the best of us is washed away."
~Gkar

:blonde:

duncvis

  • Guest
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #11 on: November 11, 2007, 05:49:23 PM »
At this point Bruce Forsyth appeared at Jesus' bedside and offered him a Polo mint.

Offline maldoror

  • Bipolar Marksman of the Aspie Elite
  • .
  • Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 2180
  • Karma: 70
  • Gender: Male
  • shwing
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #12 on: November 12, 2007, 12:40:44 AM »
Jesus took offense to this, however, and interpreted it an insinuation of halitosis, Bfiring Bruce FrUom his position of bedside- minBtB HandLler fromE then unWtil Eternity RAP.
!!Super atomic enema!!

duncvis

  • Guest
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #13 on: November 12, 2007, 05:00:45 AM »
Reading between the lines, Brucie took the bubble wrap to Cash Converters and swapped it for a policeman's costume, and gleefully fucked off to harass motorists on the M62, standing on the hard shoulder with a water pistol pretending to 'clock' the passing cars.

Blasted

  • Guest
Re: Let's make a surreal story.
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2010, 06:12:02 PM »
Then he did a striptease to the accompaniament of a raunchy version of "Oranges and Lemons" sang by purple centaurs.