Your mother put her finger up your ass when you were 12? No wonder you've got a bizarre fetish.
(This reminds me of a short film entitled Dribble, about an old, fucked-up, has-been basketball player living in a trailer. There's a scene in which he confides in a friend that his mother once assraped him with a dildo. There's a later scene in which he's visiting his mother. He tells his mother he can't get over what she did to him. She laughs, causing him to raise his voice at her. She replies with "Don't you raise your voice at your mama. I'll go get the plastic pickle out and bend you over. You'll get it harder this time." Dribble's on a DVD entitled TromaDance, vol. 3.)