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Author Topic: Post what you're thinking right now.  (Read 362569 times)

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Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17085 on: June 09, 2008, 02:44:19 PM »

My wife and I are becoming estranged.

ouch, dawg.  what makes you say that?  :hug:

The fact that she has apparently lost a great deal of respect for me, coupled with the fact that she seems to be embracing everything I can't stand in an effort to demonstrate "just how wrong I am,"  is getting out of hand.

I am very close to "throwing in the towel."
Keep it together if you can (I know how hard it can be) for your kids sake. If the worst comes to the worst, whatever you do dont allow your kids to get stuck in the middle, as can easily happen.

Offline odeon

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17086 on: June 09, 2008, 02:55:21 PM »

My wife and I are becoming estranged.

ouch, dawg.  what makes you say that?  :hug:

The fact that she has apparently lost a great deal of respect for me, coupled with the fact that she seems to be embracing everything I can't stand in an effort to demonstrate "just how wrong I am,"  is getting out of hand.

I am very close to "throwing in the towel."
Keep it together if you can (I know how hard it can be) for your kids sake. If the worst comes to the worst, whatever you do dont allow your kids to get stuck in the middle, as can easily happen.

Who are you and what did you do to Hadron?
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

- Albert Einstein

ozymandias

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17087 on: June 09, 2008, 03:57:07 PM »
It's too fucking hot

My wife is hot...............in more ways than one!   :green:

Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17088 on: June 09, 2008, 05:03:34 PM »

My wife and I are becoming estranged.

ouch, dawg.  what makes you say that?  :hug:

The fact that she has apparently lost a great deal of respect for me, coupled with the fact that she seems to be embracing everything I can't stand in an effort to demonstrate "just how wrong I am,"  is getting out of hand.

I am very close to "throwing in the towel."
Keep it together if you can (I know how hard it can be) for your kids sake. If the worst comes to the worst, whatever you do dont allow your kids to get stuck in the middle, as can easily happen.

Who are you and what did you do to Hadron?
:laugh:
Sat on him. :P Nah, its just my own experience on the recieving end for goodness knows how long when it goes really wrong.

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17089 on: June 09, 2008, 05:23:37 PM »

My wife and I are becoming estranged.

ouch, dawg.  what makes you say that?  :hug:

The fact that she has apparently lost a great deal of respect for me, coupled with the fact that she seems to be embracing everything I can't stand in an effort to demonstrate "just how wrong I am,"  is getting out of hand.

I am very close to "throwing in the towel."
Keep it together if you can (I know how hard it can be) for your kids sake. If the worst comes to the worst, whatever you do dont allow your kids to get stuck in the middle, as can easily happen.

Who are you and what did you do to Hadron?
:laugh:
Sat on him. :P Nah, its just my own experience on the recieving end for goodness knows how long when it goes really wrong.

Sorry to hear it! 

On the other hand ...

I know too many who are in essence killing themselves to stay in a dysfunctional family for the sake of kids, though. I need to find a new balance for myself, I suppose.
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.

Offline Pyraxis

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17090 on: June 09, 2008, 05:27:27 PM »
I'm not exactly speaking from experience, but I would guess that if both parents are mature about not using the kids as insult-messengers or emotional dumping grounds, the kids are probably a lot better off than if the adults stayed together in a hostile environment for the sake of a warped commitment. That the harm to the kids has more to do with the parents' individual maturity levels than whether or not they stay together.
You'll never self-actualize the subconscious canopy of stardust with that attitude.

ozymandias

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17091 on: June 09, 2008, 05:30:53 PM »
I'm not exactly speaking from experience, but I would guess that if both parents are mature about not using the kids as insult-messengers or emotional dumping grounds, the kids are probably a lot better off than if the adults stayed together in a hostile environment for the sake of a warped commitment. That the harm to the kids has more to do with the parents' individual maturity levels than whether or not they stay together.

Speaking from my own experience with an AS father and BPD mother,..................................QFT

Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17092 on: June 09, 2008, 05:35:30 PM »

My wife and I are becoming estranged.

ouch, dawg.  what makes you say that?  :hug:

The fact that she has apparently lost a great deal of respect for me, coupled with the fact that she seems to be embracing everything I can't stand in an effort to demonstrate "just how wrong I am,"  is getting out of hand.

I am very close to "throwing in the towel."
Keep it together if you can (I know how hard it can be) for your kids sake. If the worst comes to the worst, whatever you do dont allow your kids to get stuck in the middle, as can easily happen.

Who are you and what did you do to Hadron?
:laugh:
Sat on him. :P Nah, its just my own experience on the recieving end for goodness knows how long when it goes really wrong.

Sorry to hear it! 

On the other hand ...

I know too many who are in essence killing themselves to stay in a dysfunctional family for the sake of kids, though. I need to find a new balance for myself, I suppose.
Ideally you need to find a way to make it function, but dont try so hard it turns into a bitter split. You are right, its a complex balance and a bugger to find it seems.

As for my parents, I survived it I guess, and learnt something out of it. Not to mention that its not like I dont relish game playing of sorts... :S

I'm not exactly speaking from experience, but I would guess that if both parents are mature about not using the kids as insult-messengers or emotional dumping grounds, the kids are probably a lot better off than if the adults stayed together in a hostile environment for the sake of a warped commitment. That the harm to the kids has more to do with the parents' individual maturity levels than whether or not they stay together.

As soon as you get into bitterness, 9 out of 10 times it will happen unfortuantly.

Offline Parts

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17093 on: June 09, 2008, 05:48:26 PM »
How can I think with lawn mowers going
"Eat it up.  Wear it out.  Make it do or do without." 

'People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.'
George Bernard Shaw

ozymandias

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17094 on: June 09, 2008, 05:59:50 PM »
I certainly think about a lot of things when I'm mowing the lawn.......... :P

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17095 on: June 09, 2008, 07:17:24 PM »
I'm not exactly speaking from experience, but I would guess that if both parents are mature about not using the kids as insult-messengers or emotional dumping grounds, the kids are probably a lot better off than if the adults stayed together in a hostile environment for the sake of a warped commitment. That the harm to the kids has more to do with the parents' individual maturity levels than whether or not they stay together.

Exactly and it also makes good economic sense to co-habitate, right now. The personal bonds may not extend past the kids much longer, though. We have more than a "small" vested interest in trying to figure this shit out. What thought springs to my mind is that our marriage is a teenager and needs some extra space, freedom and understanding, just now.

I only wish she could see it this way.
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17096 on: June 09, 2008, 07:20:12 PM »
I certainly think about a lot of things when I'm mowing the lawn.......... :P

Yeah, it's always different when I'm making all the noise, than when the disturbance is attacking from without.
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.

GalileoAce

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17097 on: June 09, 2008, 07:33:12 PM »
Death to mosquitos!   >:(

I heartily agree!

Offline Pyraxis

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17098 on: June 09, 2008, 07:48:20 PM »
I only wish she could see it this way.

How does she see it?
You'll never self-actualize the subconscious canopy of stardust with that attitude.

Offline DirtDawg

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Re: Post what you're thinking right now.
« Reply #17099 on: June 09, 2008, 11:08:37 PM »
I only wish she could see it this way.

How does she see it?

I wish I knew.

I am trying to see this as a short term blip (due to a host of stresses lately) that we should work our way through with a bit more leeway from both of us, in both directions.

Some of her positions, responses and complaints carry a tone of hurtful finality. I hope she doesn't feel the same way about mine.
Jimi Hendrix: When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. 

Ghandi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

The end result of life's daily pain and suffering, trials and failures, tears and laughter, readings and listenings is an accumulation of wisdom in its purest form.