SHIT!
This is going to be another long one.
Summary:
I have a family (stable, mainly because of the efforts of my extremely strong wife) with two young kids.
I discovered two months ago that I have a son from a prior shagwankish relationship from my youth.
I'm meeting my eldest son next weekend.
I'm such a FUCKING emptyhead. I, mistakenly and with no thoughts of the calender, set up the meeting of my never-yet-met child of twenty eight years on "Father's Day" without thinking it through. I was so anxious to get some sort of meet-up organized, that I did not even think of the calender or my currrent responsibilities or how some of this might affect them. I was selfish. I wanted to meet him. I pressed forward with my typical tunnel visioned prowess.
I fucked up, by not thinking of the upcoming "special" day, but I am going forward with the scheduled meet-up. I am a heel in my own house.
Now, my family will be without a Father on the day intended to honor all fathers (next weekend - they were making plans). The son I have never met grew up with no father and Father's Day is a non-event to him. This was a mistake and I am a self-loathing "whatever" man, at present with too many irons in the fire.
OH, Self, how I hate thee!