I am consumed with self doubt. Aspies are not known to be needy, so why do I feel so disheartened and annoyed when my photos that I post on photgraphic forums get no response? Is that an aspie thing, to then confront the other members about their lack of response and criticism? Or is that just me being needy... and why is it I cannot damn well focus on anything. I have so many things I want to read about and get into, but I cannot focus on any one thing for longer than 20 minutes. I cannot even sit still for longer than 20 minutes without picking or fidgeting. My brain is all over the place, thought after thought after thought, and I cannot seem to break free of the obsession I have with a man...a repeating pattern since I was about 11. Obsessions with people. Not just with things, which would be so much simpler, but with people...and love interests as that, which lead to accusations of being a stalker. But part of me still wonders, are all my issues as a result of aspergers or are they as a result of borderline personality or somesuch, afterall I was once given that oh so wonderful diagnosis, over 9 years ago. You are left asking, just who the hell you are. If I am aspergers, then it explains why I have such tremendous issues with the mundane, with people, with the world out there. If I am not, then what is causing my problems. I just dont know.
