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Author Topic: AS and children  (Read 1308 times)

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Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #15 on: August 27, 2007, 02:09:40 PM »

Quote
The one thing that almost all researchers in the field agree on is that genetic predisposition plays a crucial role in laying the neurological foundations of autism in most cases. Studies have shown that if one identical twin is autistic, there's a 90 percent chance that the other twin will also have the disorder. If parents have had one autistic child, the risk of their second child being autistic rises from 1 in 500 to 1 in 20. After two children with the disorder, the sobering odds are 1 in 3.


i hate how they say risk. >:(

I know, but some people see it in those terms. 

Some people won't even try for another child if they have two autistic children, maybe because autistic children can be more difficult to take care of than typical children.
And some adopt. Normally fucked up children...

I know one woman who adopted a son with AS and a daughter with Bipolar Disorder.  She is a really special person.  They are lucky to have her for a mother.
I agree with you there. What I find ironic is how some people who already have children on the spectrum then go and adopt (to avoid having more kids on the spectrum), and they then find that the adopted kid is fucked up.

Offline odeon

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #16 on: August 27, 2007, 02:10:43 PM »
I have an autie son and an NT daughter. So it's 50% for me... :P
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Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #17 on: August 27, 2007, 02:12:05 PM »
I have an autie son and an NT daughter. So it's 50% for me... :P
Is your wife an Aspie or an NT? Is it difficult to avoid favouratism?

Offline odeon

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #18 on: August 27, 2007, 02:23:37 PM »
I have an autie son and an NT daughter. So it's 50% for me... :P
Is your wife an Aspie or an NT? Is it difficult to avoid favouratism?

She's NT. And no, they're good kids, both of them.
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Offline Kiriana

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #19 on: August 27, 2007, 02:27:45 PM »
Interestingly, on one of the parenting message boards I post on, most of the AS/autistic moms express a desire to have (more) autistic children (3 of us were pregnant at the same time!).  This shocks and horrifies the curebie parents, which is a lot of fun.  :laugh:  

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #20 on: August 27, 2007, 02:33:43 PM »
Interestingly, on one of the parenting message boards I post on, most of the AS/autistic moms express a desire to have (more) autistic children (3 of us were pregnant at the same time!).  This shocks and horrifies the curebie parents, which is a lot of fun.  :laugh:  
No offense, but I'm curious, why?
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Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #21 on: August 27, 2007, 02:35:44 PM »
I have an autie son and an NT daughter. So it's 50% for me... :P
Is your wife an Aspie or an NT? Is it difficult to avoid favouratism?

She's NT. And no, they're good kids, both of them.
One of the things that worries me about having kids is that I would favouritise the aspie ones. Whats it like being married to an NT anyway?

Offline Kiriana

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #22 on: August 27, 2007, 02:47:29 PM »
Interestingly, on one of the parenting message boards I post on, most of the AS/autistic moms express a desire to have (more) autistic children (3 of us were pregnant at the same time!).  This shocks and horrifies the curebie parents, which is a lot of fun.  :laugh:  
No offense, but I'm curious, why?

Why would someone want an  autistic child?  I think it's fairly common to want a child that's at least somehwhat like yourself.   Especially if you don't think of autism as a disorder or disability.   Dealing with special ed and trying to handle and accomodate my son's quirks and tantrums can be difficult at times, but it's also difficult to understand what motivates my NT daughter and get all her social needs met, especially when she's so young and needs to have a parent along for a lot of activities.  Six of one, half dozen of another to me.  They're both fabulous and they both present me with challenges.  This time around, I'm just hoping for an introvert of some flavor.  lol

Why does it horrify the curebies?  Because it fucks with their worldview that autism is a disorder or disability and perhaps plants an uncomfortable little seed of doubt about the things they believe and what they're trying to do.

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #23 on: August 28, 2007, 02:57:25 AM »

I agree with you there. What I find ironic is how some people who already have children on the spectrum then go and adopt (to avoid having more kids on the spectrum), and they then find that the adopted kid is fucked up.

Might not be all that genetic.

Offline Christopher McCandless

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #24 on: August 28, 2007, 02:58:18 AM »

I agree with you there. What I find ironic is how some people who already have children on the spectrum then go and adopt (to avoid having more kids on the spectrum), and they then find that the adopted kid is fucked up.

Might not be all that genetic.
Adopted kids tend to be fucked up in different ways.

Offline Kiriana

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #25 on: August 28, 2007, 06:55:47 AM »

I agree with you there. What I find ironic is how some people who already have children on the spectrum then go and adopt (to avoid having more kids on the spectrum), and they then find that the adopted kid is fucked up.

Might not be all that genetic.
Adopted kids tend to be fucked up in different ways.

Depends on the age and their situation before the adoption, but yeah, they certainly can be.  Attachment disorders have some of the same symptoms as autism, but in the cases I've seen, even more extreme.

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #26 on: August 28, 2007, 02:01:08 PM »
Interestingly, on one of the parenting message boards I post on, most of the AS/autistic moms express a desire to have (more) autistic children (3 of us were pregnant at the same time!).  This shocks and horrifies the curebie parents, which is a lot of fun.  :laugh: 
No offense, but I'm curious, why?

Why would someone want an  autistic child?  I think it's fairly common to want a child that's at least somehwhat like yourself.   Especially if you don't think of autism as a disorder or disability.   Dealing with special ed and trying to handle and accomodate my son's quirks and tantrums can be difficult at times, but it's also difficult to understand what motivates my NT daughter and get all her social needs met, especially when she's so young and needs to have a parent along for a lot of activities.  Six of one, half dozen of another to me.  They're both fabulous and they both present me with challenges.  This time around, I'm just hoping for an introvert of some flavor.  lol

Why does it horrify the curebies?  Because it fucks with their worldview that autism is a disorder or disability and perhaps plants an uncomfortable little seed of doubt about the things they believe and what they're trying to do.

i would expect to have an aspie and i would be thrilled to have one. i wouldn't know what to do with an NT. i don't understand them.

i wouldn't know what the appropriate time for dating would be because i've never felt ready, and i wouldn't know how long she/he should be allowed to stay out cuz i never had any curfews. i think it's hard to be a parent and you have to be willing to make mistakes because noone is perfect. with an aspie child, i would understand them better.
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Offline odeon

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #27 on: August 28, 2007, 02:46:11 PM »
there are things you understand better about an aspie child if you are an aspie yourself. but my son's as different from me than my NT daughter.
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Re: AS and children
« Reply #28 on: August 28, 2007, 04:08:31 PM »
aspies are different from each other too.
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Offline odeon

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Re: AS and children
« Reply #29 on: August 28, 2007, 04:18:09 PM »
aspies are different from each other too.

my point exactly. though i'm an aspie and my son's hfa.
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