Things that a lone man can't do without arousing suspicion

[Callaway]

I found loitering around playgrounds in a trenchcoat
would get LOTS of interesting attention. Especially
wearing shorts underneath it.

If I saw you loitering around a playground wearing a trenchcoat with shorts concealed underneath in the summertime, at the very least I would probably watch you closely.  If we were the only people there, I would probably take my daughter home.

[SovaNu]

I was just reading this, and it got me thinking; what things can't I, as an unaccompanied male, do without making people suspect that I'm a paedophile?

Nougat, crocodiles and lavender hold Anthony Peregrine's attention in Drôme.

The woman behind the cash desk looked suspicious. "Are you alone?" she asked. I glanced around, to ensure I had not been joined by a coach party.

"Apparently," I said. She looked even more suspicious, and no wonder. There is something deeply wrong about a lone man of mature years seeking entry to an establishment called Le Palais des Bonbons et du Nougat (Palace of Sweets and Nougat).

I went in anyway. I had to. I was in Montélimar, which, as we all know, is the European centre of nougat production. This is neither more, nor less, impressive than being world capital of pear drops.

...
...
...

I wandered about entranced. I learnt of Alexander the Great's role in sugar history, admired sugar sculptures and listened to the Archies over the PA (Sugar Sugar - this place doesn't miss a trick). I smiled at children, whose mothers gathered them in rather abruptly, and thoughtlessly entered a competition to win my own weight in sweetmeats. I now live in fear of the postman staggering up the drive under a 13-stone slab of nougat.

Can I go to a park where there are young children?  Can I go to a fairground?  How about watching a Disney film at the cinema?  It seems that for a lot of things, guys need something to legitimise their presence; a dog, a kid of their own or friends, while women seem more able to do things alone without having people think the worst about their motivations.

I agree with you Peter, that men alone in some situations might be seen as perverts etc.  And it's wrong.

However, whilst women may enjoy more social freedoms in this area...I disagree on one point, no women can often not do a lot of things alone - walk down the street at dusk and exercise by themselves...or walk home somewhere isolated by themselves...otherwise if they get attacked they were 'asking for it' for being there alone. 

But, society sucks.

yeah. i don't go out alone at night, i used to but i think it was stupid. but even then i lived in a really populated area with lots of lights and people around even at night and i only went to the store that was 5 minutes away. even then i felt a little unsafe. if i was a man i wouldn't be that afraid because i might get beaten up but probably not raped.

i don't even like to go out at night with my mom except to the wine store a minute away from us.

and even with men women aren't safe. there was a livejournal entry i read by a woman who had her face bashed in by a man when she was with another man. he couldn't protect her, the man just came and broke her face pretty much and maybe other bones too... she had pictures on her blog, before and after pictures. it was horrendous. she had to have painful surgery and was in terrible pain and she was like, "how could this happen? i thought i was safe with a male friend."

[Christopher McCandless]

I was just reading this, and it got me thinking; what things can't I, as an unaccompanied male, do without making people suspect that I'm a paedophile?

Nougat, crocodiles and lavender hold Anthony Peregrine's attention in Drôme.

The woman behind the cash desk looked suspicious. "Are you alone?" she asked. I glanced around, to ensure I had not been joined by a coach party.

"Apparently," I said. She looked even more suspicious, and no wonder. There is something deeply wrong about a lone man of mature years seeking entry to an establishment called Le Palais des Bonbons et du Nougat (Palace of Sweets and Nougat).

I went in anyway. I had to. I was in Montélimar, which, as we all know, is the European centre of nougat production. This is neither more, nor less, impressive than being world capital of pear drops.

...
...
...

I wandered about entranced. I learnt of Alexander the Great's role in sugar history, admired sugar sculptures and listened to the Archies over the PA (Sugar Sugar - this place doesn't miss a trick). I smiled at children, whose mothers gathered them in rather abruptly, and thoughtlessly entered a competition to win my own weight in sweetmeats. I now live in fear of the postman staggering up the drive under a 13-stone slab of nougat.

Can I go to a park where there are young children?  Can I go to a fairground?  How about watching a Disney film at the cinema?  It seems that for a lot of things, guys need something to legitimise their presence; a dog, a kid of their own or friends, while women seem more able to do things alone without having people think the worst about their motivations.

I agree with you Peter, that men alone in some situations might be seen as perverts etc.  And it's wrong.

However, whilst women may enjoy more social freedoms in this area...I disagree on one point, no women can often not do a lot of things alone - walk down the street at dusk and exercise by themselves...or walk home somewhere isolated by themselves...otherwise if they get attacked they were 'asking for it' for being there alone. 

But, society sucks.

yeah. i don't go out alone at night, i used to but i think it was stupid. but even then i lived in a really populated area with lots of lights and people around even at night and i only went to the store that was 5 minutes away. even then i felt a little unsafe. if i was a man i wouldn't be that afraid because i might get beaten up but probably not raped.

i don't even like to go out at night with my mom except to the wine store a minute away from us.

and even with men women aren't safe. there was a livejournal entry i read by a woman who had her face bashed in by a man when she was with another man. he couldn't protect her, the man just came and broke her face pretty much and maybe other bones too... she had pictures on her blog, before and after pictures. it was horrendous. she had to have painful surgery and was in terrible pain and she was like, "how could this happen? i thought i was safe with a male friend."

Men can get raped as well, Milla. Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female. Its probably just as dangerous to get into your car. If you are in fear of men when walking about the scummy people who carry out all these nasty acts win.

[Calandale]

I found loitering around playgrounds in a trenchcoat
would get LOTS of interesting attention. Especially
wearing shorts underneath it.

If I saw you loitering around a playground wearing a trenchcoat with shorts concealed underneath in the summertime, at the very least I would probably watch you closely.  If we were the only people there, I would probably take my daughter home.

I don't blame you. Actually, it's an outfit I really only wear on campus.
I like the looks of worry.

[Calandale]

Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female.

Yeah, but one should have a healthy worry. My wife was attacked by a guy (luckily she
stabbed him), and my PE was raped in a fairly reasonable neighborhood.

[Christopher McCandless]

Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female.

Yeah, but one should have a healthy worry. My wife was attacked by a guy (luckily she
stabbed him), and my PE was raped in a fairly reasonable neighborhood.

Who is your PE, is that the word filter playing around again? You should take sensible precautions, for example with cars dont drive pissed. But being worried about the risks should not stop you enjoying yourself.

[Lucifer]

Men can get raped as well, Milla. Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female. Its probably just as dangerous to get into your car. If you are in fear of men when walking about the scummy people who carry out all these nasty acts win.

don't be naive.  that's like saying, "if you give in to the bloke holding the submachine gun, you're letting him win."

i will fight until my dying breath to make the streets safe for women, for everybody, in fact.  that doesn't mean i'm going to be stupid and wander around on my own, late at night.  there's a difference about what should be reality, and what is the reality.  it's called starting from where things actually are, i.e., pragmatism.

[Calandale]

Who is your PE, is that the word filter playing around again? You should take sensible precautions, for example with cars dont drive pissed. But being worried about the risks should not stop you enjoying yourself.

Psycho Ex.

i will fight until my dying breath to make the streets safe for women, for everybody, in fact.  that doesn't mean i'm going to be stupid and wander around on my own, late at night.  there's a difference about what should be reality, and what is the reality.  it's called starting from where things actually are, i.e., pragmatism.

I largely agree. Nonetheless, one can go overboard.
I found my wife's solution the best one. Be armed,
and know how to use what you've got. Anyone's in
danger, but 'twould suck not to be able to go out
at night.

[Christopher McCandless]

Men can get raped as well, Milla. Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female. Its probably just as dangerous to get into your car. If you are in fear of men when walking about the scummy people who carry out all these nasty acts win.

don't be naive.  that's like saying, "if you give in to the bloke holding the submachine gun, you're letting him win."

i will fight until my dying breath to make the streets safe for women, for everybody, in fact.  that doesn't mean i'm going to be stupid and wander around on my own, late at night.  there's a difference about what should be reality, and what is the reality.  it's called starting from where things actually are, i.e., pragmatism.

True there is pragmatism, but it depends where you live and how well you can defend yourself. I suppose I just dont like the idea of people being bullied off the streets by yobs, although I am sidestepping the problem by going to the uni that I am going to.

[Peter]

Are men really safer than women?  Women are at a far higher risk of P.I.ual assault, but males are at a higher risk of being victims of violent crime in general.

Generally, young men run a higher risk of being victims of violent crime than any other group. According to the British Crime Survey, one in five males aged 16 to 24 in England and Wales were the victims of violence in 1999, more than twice the rate for females of the same age, who were the next highest 'at risk' group.

[SovaNu]

Men can get raped as well, Milla. Asides, it is quite rare for someone to attack you in the street at night, male or female. Its probably just as dangerous to get into your car. If you are in fear of men when walking about the scummy people who carry out all these nasty acts win.

 

and what did i say? i said i would probably not get raped if i was a man.

i know men can get raped you gnatwit. there's less chance of them getting raped however, that was my point.

and if you don't own a pussy then shut the fuck up. you don't know shit about being a woman outside alone at night.

i am not putting my life in danger to "win" some stupid game. i'm so gheying you for this.

oh that's right. you opted out. now who's the coward?

[SovaNu]

Are men really safer than women?  Women are at a far higher risk of P.I.ual assault, but males are at a higher risk of being victims of violent crime in general.

Generally, young men run a higher risk of being victims of violent crime than any other group. According to the British Crime Survey, one in five males aged 16 to 24 in England and Wales were the victims of violence in 1999, more than twice the rate for females of the same age, who were the next highest 'at risk' group.

possibly. but i'd rather get beaten up ten times than get raped once.

[Calandale]

and if you don't own a pussy then shut the fuck up.

I wish I owned a pussy or two.

possibly. but i'd rather get beaten up ten times than get raped once.

I don't know for me. I really don't.

[SovaNu]

and if you don't own a pussy then shut the fuck up.

I wish I owned a pussy or two.

possibly. but i'd rather get beaten up ten times than get raped once.

I don't know for me. I really don't.

hence the pussy comment. assrape is different than pussyrape. it can be hella painful but the ass is just the ass. a woman's vagina is a sacred place. at least to me. it would cause horrible emotional damage. the assrape would cause horrible physical damage, but would be equivalent to getting beaten up badly to me.

[Peter]

Are men really safer than women?  Women are at a far higher risk of P.I.ual assault, but males are at a higher risk of being victims of violent crime in general.

Generally, young men run a higher risk of being victims of violent crime than any other group. According to the British Crime Survey, one in five males aged 16 to 24 in England and Wales were the victims of violence in 1999, more than twice the rate for females of the same age, who were the next highest 'at risk' group.

possibly. but i'd rather get beaten up ten times than get raped once.

What's your preferred ratio of being killed to being raped?