Eamonn that was old. If I were to meet her personaly it would be for friendship purposes. I can find distractions so I don;t stalk. There are problems with your stalker theroy. She said she likes to travel, so I assumed she would not mind, and did not want to live in New Jersey anymore.? I was stuck in limbo when she mentioned Sean.? I knew it would be a big problem to travel to see her, but I did not want to hurt her. I could not open my mouth for fear of hurting her.? I also thought it would be worth it because she is so nice to me, and? she is closer than anyone else here.? I don;t know why she is worrying considering what I risk loosing over stalking.? She stalkes too, so why is she complaining? I memorized things that are important to me, and she is the first person who gave me a chance, as a friend. That means alot of after 23 years with nobody. I understand that is partly my fault, but they did not bother to try when they had the chance.