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Author Topic: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column  (Read 839 times)

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Offline In The spaGhetto

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Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« on: May 22, 2007, 01:21:54 PM »
well it sounds like it anyway.


http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2084332,00.html



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I don't get people. What's their appeal, precisely? They waddle around with their haircuts on, cluttering the pavement like gormless, farting skittles. They're awful.


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As you might imagine, given my inability to relate to the rest of the human race on even the most cursory level, I'm somewhat socially inept. Slide me between two strangers at any light-hearted jamboree and I'll either rock awkwardly and silently on my heels, or come out with a stone-cold conversation-killer like, "This room's quite rectangular, isn't it?" I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

A friend once tried help by coaching me in small talk. Step one: take note of what day it is. On a Monday or Tuesday, ask what they got up to at the weekend. Thursday or Friday, ask if they've got any plans for the coming weekend.

"What about Wednesdays?" I asked, wide-eyed. "Or what if I meet them at the weekend? What the hell happens then?" "Oh, for Christ's sake. Just ask what they do for a living."


I think I love charlie brooker, if i was gay, i would want to marry him and have his adopted kids.

His show on tv, Screen Wipe, is fantastic
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I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #1 on: May 22, 2007, 01:23:08 PM »
Is there anything else you AV refuges can offer other than the tedious "spot the aspie" tripe?
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Offline In The spaGhetto

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #2 on: May 22, 2007, 01:26:33 PM »
probably not. I don't think i could really compete with those "hilarious" voice recordings
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I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #3 on: May 22, 2007, 01:27:36 PM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:26:33 PM
probably not. I don't think i could really compete with those "hilarious" voice recordings

Not asking you to compete, just to add to the fun. And in your case, you need to work on your definition on what is "fun" around here.

Are you always such a touchy fag, dear aspie?
« Last Edit: May 22, 2007, 01:29:33 PM by thepeaguy's fan »
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Offline Callaway

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2007, 01:28:03 PM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:26:33 PM
probably not. I don't think i could really compete with those "hilarious" voice recordings

:LMAO:

 :plus:
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The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2007, 01:34:16 PM »
Quote from: Callaway on May 22, 2007, 01:28:03 PM
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:26:33 PM
probably not. I don't think i could really compete with those "hilarious" voice recordings

:LMAO:

 :plus:

He's only pissy because I trashed his precious little aspie ego today.
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Offline In The spaGhetto

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #6 on: May 22, 2007, 01:34:36 PM »
not at all.  are you always so pointlessly aggressive?

please do go ahead and teach me how to have "fun"
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I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

Litigious

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #7 on: May 22, 2007, 01:35:46 PM »
Asking what people work with is one of the most common topics among NTs in Sweden. I think it's utterly stupid. And they don't ask "Do you work and with what?" but "What do you work with?" Like it's some kind of blasphemy not to work. It's even more stupid considering that about 50% of the population actually don't work.
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The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #8 on: May 22, 2007, 01:36:04 PM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:34:36 PM
not at all.  are you always so pointlessly aggressive?

please do go ahead and teach me how to have "fun"

Are you always someone that needs to have a point for everything?

Looks like you're beginning to follow my lead already, seeing as how you took my first bait.
« Last Edit: May 22, 2007, 01:40:52 PM by thepeaguy's fan »
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Offline In The spaGhetto

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #9 on: May 22, 2007, 01:36:50 PM »
Quote
He's only pissy because I trashed his precious little aspie ego today.

 :clap:
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I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #10 on: May 22, 2007, 01:37:47 PM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:36:50 PM
Quote
He's only pissy because I trashed his precious little aspie ego today.

 :clap:

And give me a gold star while you're at it, you patronising ninny.

Eh, I'll give you a karma for the voice recording remark.
« Last Edit: May 22, 2007, 01:45:44 PM by thepeaguy's fan »
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Offline In The spaGhetto

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #11 on: May 22, 2007, 01:45:39 PM »
to be honest, unless you're going to insult me with some amount of wit i can't really be arsed
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I glide through the social whirl with all the elegance of a dog in high heels.

The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #12 on: May 22, 2007, 01:47:14 PM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:45:39 PM
to be honest, unless you're going to insult me with some amount of wit i can't really be arsed

Wit is in the eye of the beholder. Some are amazed by my wit, while others just don't see the point in it.

I see you're not a fan. That's okay, Scrooge -- I'm not yours either.
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The_P

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #13 on: May 23, 2007, 05:16:15 AM »
Quote from: In The spaGhetto on May 22, 2007, 01:26:33 PM
probably not. I don't think i could really compete with those "hilarious" voice recordings

http://www.mediafire.com/?7jedanz3frj

:(

Okay, I haven't rehearsed it. But why would I want to make a big effort for a dipshit like him?
« Last Edit: May 23, 2007, 05:17:47 AM by thepeaguy's fan »
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Offline McGiver

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Re: Ah this is great - Aspie written newspaper column
« Reply #14 on: May 23, 2007, 06:58:37 AM »
ah, pea got pwned.
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Misunderstood.
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