So, I listened to the first one.
It definitely HAS music IN it.
But, I'm not sure that it IS music.
And, I don't necessarily dislike.
Anything that can be scored musically on paper is defined as music. Your ethnocentric view seems very weak in regards to rap music as some of it can be performed by live musicians and is just another performing style. Rammstein doesn't really use rap beats, they are more electronica dance related. You said dance music is just noise earlier? That is fucking stupid. I will have to inform those that play the Waltz of your opinion. Same goes for jazz swing music, might as well get the Brian Setzer orchestra as well to stop playing. That is if you think dance music isn't music. Salsa and samba music might as well go to hell too lol.
Rammstein has a real person performing electronic drums, not a machine. Drum machines are lame to me. Anything programmed is lame and I prefer live performances as they can showcase the real physical skill of the performers if the material is complex and difficult enough.
Metal bands are shit live? Iron Maiden was good when I saw them. Lynyrd Skynyrd sucked a few of the times I saw them (though they were awesome one time). I have seen numerous mistakes at Bluegrass and Jazz festivals. Mistakes and getting screwed by the soundman are two different things entirely. I would say that metal bands and sucking live are not exclusive. 95% is a really high figure, seems you are highly biased in that regard.
The only live bands that I have seen that really sucked on more than one song were Incantation, Dope and the one time I saw Nirvana in 10th grade. Kurt Cobain was so wasted that all he did was barely do vocals, Pat Smear did most of the work on guitar. It was pathetic. The Breeders opened for Nirvana and someone threw their shoe at Kim Deal lol. The Breeders were more tight live than Nirvana, but the kids wanted them off stage and for Nirvana to play. That was the biggest live disappointment I have ever seen. That wasn't a metal band either.
Other than that Skynyrd's drummer seemed to not even play during a part of the solo when I saw them before a Jaguars game a few years ago. Really I haven't seen too many big fuck ups from the bigger bands. U2 was good when I saw them as were the Rolling Stones. Metallica and Pantera were both really tight live when I got to see them. I think I have been fortunate from a live show perspective as I have seen and heard bigger mistakes from live recordings (DVDs and CDs) than when I saw the band live myself. Emperor was perfect when I saw them, but they had the volume down on one guitar big time on the DVD my friend has (got fixed halfway through the first song).
You seem to dislike the distortion and tone of metal guitar. I prefer it to punk music and most rock music as far as distortion goes. It just has a much fatter bottom end that masks the basslines at times. Metal has an edge to its sound that can be overdone with distortion but every rock related genre always has bands with too much distortion. Distortion and the electric guitar were a part of the movement to more modern music. The actual musician is going to be taken out of music in some cases. Even the clean stuff is oversaturated with effects in some regards. Then you are just left with acoustic playing, which can get old after a while to me (just like everything else).
I prefer bands with people actually drumming. I didn't support Samael's movement to drum machines only for example. Sampling can be very overdone as well. Pro-tools and other modern recording software have changed the way music is made forever, no matter what you consider music or not. So much looping and cutting and pasting takes the real talent out of musicianship. You can't play that riff every time in a song flawlessly? Then don't record it and copy the damn thing. That is why you see so many shit live bands. Most pop/rock bands I see these days suck ass when they play live. Modern production is so fucking saturated with effects it is stupid. This goes for most genres of modern music. The people that are the most pathetic have to lip synch live of course.