Ever get the chance, let me know first and I'll get the lathe spun up and the brazing torch lit and make you a set of knuckles, brass or steel, you choose. Studded/spiked (or both) if you want, I'd think the type of long, tapered steel spikes that go on apparel such as my leather dog collars (for my wear that is, I don't have a dog) would do quite well in making him look better, cosmetically speaking.
He makes me think of the bastard-child of G.W.Minge...I mean..ahem..Bush...Ah, well, easy to get the two confused. And Boris Johnson.
Although the latter doesn't strike me as too awful, for a politurd at least. He does look like he spent a sizeable portion of his formative years running face first into a brick wall.