Al, I've only spent a few days in Chiang Mai. It is a nice part of the world. I lived in Bangers for a couple of years with my family, and my daughter was born there. I love Bangkok. Chiang Mai is nicer in a lot of ways, quieter and not as hot.
It's pretty easy to get along in Thailand, the people are generally very tolerant unless you really go out of your way to be a dickhead. Unfortunately a lot of expats and tourists do exactly that. I found expats in Thailand generally to be less obnoxious than expats in Jakarta, but it really is a low bar.
More than once I have seen tourists who have been walking around all day take off their shoes and put their feet up. This is one of the most offensive things you can do in Thailand. Never show the bottom of your feet, and especially do not point them towards anyone. Raising your voice is also generally offensive in Asia, as is showing any outward sign of anger. Money must be respected because it has the king's image on it. Don't drop money and step on it to stop it rolling or blowing away, and don't deliberately damage or burn money. Never touch the top of someone's head. Riding a motorbike or getting a motorbike taxi in Thailand is extremely dangerous, I wouldn't do it. Defensive driving isn't really a thing.
Some expats spend a lot of money to have what they consider an adequate lifestyle in Thailand. Others find that they adapt to the way of life and spend less than they expected to. I remember going shopping in Bangkok with my Australian friend who still lives there, he was going to buy some Australian beef for a stir fry. It was something like 4 times the price of the less tender local beef. I convinced him to buy the local beef and then I taught him how to cook it so that it wasn't as tough as an old shoe. In my opinion the best food in Thailand is also the cheapest.
