Fundies say the darnedest things!

[Bastet]

 

[Parts]

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

['andersom']

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

[Bastet]

Pastor: ‘I would smear feces all over myself if my son married a man’

 

While speaking at the National Religious Liberties Conference last weekend, Pastor Kevin Swanson told the crowd that he was “not kidding” when he said he’d smear feces all over himself if his son were ever to marry another man.

“There are families, we’re talking Christian families, pastors’ families, elders’ families from good, godly churches,” he preached. “Their sons are rebelling! Hanging out with homosexuals and getting married!”

“And,” he added, “the parents are invited!”

The statement was met with a collective gasp of shock from the audience.

“What would you do if that was the case?” Swanson continued. “Here is what I would do: Sackcloth and ashes at the entrance to the church and I’d sit in cow manure and I’d spread it all over my body. That’s what I would do and I’m not kidding! I’m not laughing!”

“I’m grieving!” Swanson screamed, tears of rage running down his cheeks. “I’m mourning! I’m pointing out the problem!”

“It’s not a gay time,” he continued. “These are the people with the sores! The gaping sores! The sores that are pussy (sic) and gross and people are coming in and carving happy faces on the sores! That’s not a nice thing to do! Don’t you dare carve happy faces on open, pussy (sic) sores!”

We’d include the video but it appears Swanson’s team has since scrubbed it from the internet. Luckily, Rachel Maddow featured a few clips from it on her show earlier this week.








http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2015/11/pastor-i-would-smear-feces-all-over-myself-if-my-son-married-a-man/

[Parts]

Pastor: ‘I would smear feces all over myself if my son married a man’

And with that  the new Christian super hero was born SCATMAN fighting the evils of homosexuality with the powers of shit

[Bastet]

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

His penis also cured a variety of ailments which is why he had a duty to sleep around on his wife. Such a noble man. He then took them on as sister wives because they needed continued doses of his magic penis.

[Al Swearegen]

*Sigh*

['andersom']

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

His penis also cured a variety of ailments which is why he had a duty to sleep around on his wife. Such a noble man. He then took them on as sister wives because they needed continued doses of his magic penis.

You're mixing him up with his father. 

[Bastet]

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

His penis also cured a variety of ailments which is why he had a duty to sleep around on his wife. Such a noble man. He then took them on as sister wives because they needed continued doses of his magic penis.

You're mixing him up with his father. 

Must be. I forget a lot of shit lately. Scumbag brain.

['andersom']

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

His penis also cured a variety of ailments which is why he had a duty to sleep around on his wife. Such a noble man. He then took them on as sister wives because they needed continued doses of his magic penis.

You're mixing him up with his father. 

Must be. I forget a lot of shit lately. Scumbag brain.

One's forgotten shit can be another one's facial mask. 

[Bastet]

Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were built by Joseph to store grain 

Of course Joseph did all that. Single handedly.
It's a miracle.

His penis also cured a variety of ailments which is why he had a duty to sleep around on his wife. Such a noble man. He then took them on as sister wives because they needed continued doses of his magic penis.

You're mixing him up with his father. 

Must be. I forget a lot of shit lately. Scumbag brain.

One's forgotten shit can be another one's facial mask. 

Mudmask.

[Arya Quinn]

Pastor: ‘I would smear feces all over myself if my son married a man’

 

While speaking at the National Religious Liberties Conference last weekend, Pastor Kevin Swanson told the crowd that he was “not kidding” when he said he’d smear feces all over himself if his son were ever to marry another man.

“There are families, we’re talking Christian families, pastors’ families, elders’ families from good, godly churches,” he preached. “Their sons are rebelling! Hanging out with homosexuals and getting married!”

“And,” he added, “the parents are invited!”

The statement was met with a collective gasp of shock from the audience.

“What would you do if that was the case?” Swanson continued. “Here is what I would do: Sackcloth and ashes at the entrance to the church and I’d sit in cow manure and I’d spread it all over my body. That’s what I would do and I’m not kidding! I’m not laughing!”

“I’m grieving!” Swanson screamed, tears of rage running down his cheeks. “I’m mourning! I’m pointing out the problem!”

“It’s not a gay time,” he continued. “These are the people with the sores! The gaping sores! The sores that are pussy (sic) and gross and people are coming in and carving happy faces on the sores! That’s not a nice thing to do! Don’t you dare carve happy faces on open, pussy (sic) sores!”

We’d include the video but it appears Swanson’s team has since scrubbed it from the internet. Luckily, Rachel Maddow featured a few clips from it on her show earlier this week.








http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2015/11/pastor-i-would-smear-feces-all-over-myself-if-my-son-married-a-man/

He should join the DUP here in good old Northern Ireland where the bigots and drunks can roam freely.

[Gopher Gary]

I support all religious fundamentalists smearing themselves in shit. 

[odeon]

Pastor: ‘I would smear feces all over myself if my son married a man’

And with that  the new Christian super hero was born SCATMAN fighting the evils of homosexuality with the powers of shit