I have as it goes; middle school was four years of abuse, being ostracised and set up for stuff, hassled by certain teachers, and playground fights. At the time it sucked. I was lucky enough that it didn't crush my self-esteem, I just carried a lot of anger and fuck-you attitude into adulthood, which is still causing me problems as far as socially appropriate behaviour goes - you seem to be suffering from a fair amount of self loathing as a result of the shit you went through. It wasn't your fault - a lot of people are cunts (this rises to 95% between 11 and 17, according to the Bureau of Fictional Statistics). Hopefully you can let go of it and learn that you are the bigger man mate.