Speaking of butt-touching. On time I was out with some random-friend, this guy was "emo" before it was a thing, always dressed in black, very artsy, in fact, his room at home was painted black. That amazed me!
Anyway, this guy was very sensitive, always 100% focused on respecting other people, and such. Me on the other hand, I was in my "Satan's little helper"-phase (a friend of mine titled me that
), we were in a "underground" nightclub, in the basement, where people were dancing in a small section.
I explained to him how people subconciously move between sections, according to their ambitions, and that this particular dance floor was for those with sexual ambitions, they come here to get laid. If they didn't want to get laid, they woulda danced on the other floor, or not danced at all.
He was sceptical.
I decided to prove it to him, and I walked right onto the floor, with a huge grin, and just grabbed a girls ass, while she danced. Nothing happened. I dunno if she approved, but nothing happened. The emo dude was dying of embarassment, he didn't know where to hide! I grabbed another ass, to park my point, and he begged me to stop grabbing asses.
Epilogue: Immediately after, on my way off the dance floor, a dude came up to me, eagerly dancing, moving his shoulders, staring right at me, and grabbed my ass. Fuck you, karma.