Bald men should wear bandanas like chemotherapy patients do. That way, no one would ever rip them off. How many cancer patients do you know who have been bludgeoned to death with a giant swordfish made out paper mache? None. That's how many.
Secondly, does anyone know when crucifixitions went out of style? I mean, did the fashion experts in the Roman Empire just go one day, "You know... the whole crucifix style is so 39 A.D. This season we want to see more castratrations, bring on the eunuchs!"
And does anyone else think that some musicians fake being blind just to get sympathy? I swear I saw Ray Charles driving a Ferrari down the street once. He only hit one mailman and a french poodle.
How come the olympic games aren't nude any more? Surely we can start with the female beach volleyballers.
Thanks you for your thirty second attention span. Please go back to your regular programming.
