Author Topic: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice  (Read 592 times)

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Offline Gopher Gary

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Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« on: August 13, 2013, 06:43:04 PM »
Yes, you read right. For no cost to you and as a symbol of my immense generosity, I will bestow my dating advice upon you unwashed Intensians. Ask away. 8)
:gopher:

Offline Semicolon

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2013, 06:44:38 PM »
[suspicious]If only MLA was here.

[/suspicious]:laugh:
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There is only one truth and it is that people do have penises of different sizes and one of them is the longest.

Offline Icequeen

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2013, 06:48:38 PM »
Oh wise one, please give us your tips. :zoinks:

 :laugh:
"No one can tell what goes on in between the person you were and the person you become.
No one can chart that blue and lonely section of hell. There are no maps of the change.
You just come out the other side...

...or you don't"

~Stephen King~

Offline TA

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2013, 07:02:05 PM »
[suspicious]If only MLA was here.

[/suspicious]:laugh:

[suspicious]Someone needs to get him back here, the resulting thread would be gold.[/suspicious]
The stupidity of humanity FILLS ME WITH RAGE!

Offline Gopher Gary

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #4 on: August 13, 2013, 07:58:02 PM »
MLA was always jealous of my awesome sex life. I have had a string of young hotties at my fingertips. My geek chic is a real chick magnet. ;) I've been with more women than he has.
:gopher:

Offline conlang returns

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #5 on: August 13, 2013, 08:03:01 PM »
Oh great Alex.  I am content to remain single and be a sexual hermit looking at dirty perverted p0rn0z.  Is that wrong?  Should I become a breeder and fulfill my parents' dreams of proving Malthus wrong?  Or should I just keep fapping? :wanker: :wanker: :GA:



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Offline Bastet

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #6 on: August 13, 2013, 08:05:23 PM »
Show me your pp and let me peg you.
:kitten: OBSESSIVE AILUROPHILE :kitten:


It is far better for people to hate you for doing the right thing than for people to love you for doing the wrong thing. Never ever forget that.

Offline Beardy McFuckface

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #7 on: August 13, 2013, 08:09:25 PM »
How long is your plank (patent pending)? Do you wank your plank?

Offline Semicolon

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #8 on: August 13, 2013, 08:14:35 PM »
How many women are you dating right now?
I2 has a smiley for everything. Even a hamster wheel. :hamsterwheel:

Quote from: iamnotaparakeet
Jesus died on the cross to show us that BDSM is a legitimate form of love.
There is only one truth and it is that people do have penises of different sizes and one of them is the longest.

Offline Gopher Gary

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #9 on: August 13, 2013, 08:52:08 PM »
Show me your pp and let me peg you.

Let me tap that ass ad I'll think about it. ;)

How long is your plank (patent pending)? Do you wank your plank?

8.5 inches. I don't have to wank. There is always a pretty young thing ready to pet my python or take me for a midnight ride.
:gopher:

Offline Gopher Gary

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #10 on: August 13, 2013, 08:54:29 PM »
How many women are you dating right now?

6
:gopher:

Offline Gopher Gary

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2014, 09:22:31 PM »
Alright I'm back to shine my light upon you all once more.
:gopher:

Offline Arya Quinn

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #12 on: August 26, 2014, 01:06:43 AM »
I'd rather stick my penis in a woodchipper than take dating advice from you  :M

Offline Lestat

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #13 on: August 26, 2014, 03:37:04 AM »
Alex plank, aka egomaniacal  dating spastic egofucktard.


IMO, he needs to be locked in a room with justin bieber, then the room be flooded with lewisite and phosgene oxime, to give these two aneuploid fuckskunks  a well deserved, slow, painful death. Maybe toss in some Marburg, lassa fever, hantaviruses and a liberal spritz of capsaicin to the face.

Rot in perdition, planck you fucking insult to the autistic gene pool. Fuck you, you autism-speaks mouthpiece son of a syphilitic gutterslut whore from the blackest abysses known to man. Crawl back under whatever festering rock you spawned under.

Fuckin' bitch.


Oh, and I would rather die of ebola, than fuck your mom with your own severed micropenis on a stick. Son a bitch, dig your own grave, I'd be happy to kick you in it and bury your mustard-gassed blistered carcass alive in the dirt within which you first spawned your useless contribution to the shallowest possible end of the autie gene pool.

Mother fucking son of a cunt. Have a nice day, shitmonger :pwned:
« Last Edit: August 26, 2014, 03:39:37 AM by Lestat »
Beyond the pale. Way, way beyond the pale.

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Offline Semicolon

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Re: Alex Plank offers sage dating advice
« Reply #14 on: August 26, 2014, 05:17:19 AM »
Alex, have you ever made porn for Autism Speaks?
I2 has a smiley for everything. Even a hamster wheel. :hamsterwheel:

Quote from: iamnotaparakeet
Jesus died on the cross to show us that BDSM is a legitimate form of love.
There is only one truth and it is that people do have penises of different sizes and one of them is the longest.