1. What are your interests?
2. Where, approximately, do you live?
1. North Korea, neuroscience (BRAINS!!!), philosophy, Star Trek, Monty Python, Sudoku, and world domination. I'm not a big fan of TV except for an occasional favorite. I read obsessively, mostly nonfiction but an occasional quality fictional work. Oh, and I'm in the process of developing an interest in photography. It may take hold, it may not.
2. I live outside of Washington, D.C. Scary, right? You can smell the stupid all the way out here. I want to move to the mountains further out in Virginia or West Virginia. One day.
Did you ever watch that 80's show, ALF?
Did you like it?
I watched it a few times, but it creeped me out. I was afraid alf would eat my cat.
Is all well at your house today?
Yes it is, thank you for inquiring! 
I haven't heard from the paternal parental unit and, in light of his recent antics, I opted to ignore him today. The kids and I got DH some Star Trek DVDs for father's day. The laundry pile isn't taller than me atm. Over all, a good day!
How tall are you?
Are you someone with an optimistic view on life?
I'm 5'1". Nearly. It is more like 5' and 1/2", but I round it up. I'm fun size, like those little candy bars you get on Halloween! My 8 y/o is only six inches shorter than me, maybe less since he's had a growth spurt. I have to get on my tip-toes to sign my name on most credit card readers. I had some amazon woman lean down with her hands on her knees to talk to me like you would when addressing a child. I have been refused alcohol despite presenting my ID because I couldn't possibly be 21. When a nurse took the blanket off of my legs after a medical procedure she said, "Gee, I thought there would be more of you than that!" Yeah, it is awesome.
It has some benefits, though. Nobody expects the little one....hee hee hee
And at 29 it is kind of nice to get carded all the time as long as they'll serve me.
I used to be someone with an optimistic view on life. Now, eh, not so much. I'm not a big fan of most humans. Thus the whole "go off into the mountains and hide" thing. I care about a few people, I like a few people. I'm terrified of everyone. People are capable of unthinkably awful things.
I suppose I am optimistic about our future if we can survive long enough to realize our potential.
are you am I good looking?
I don't know about me. I do have a soft spot for older gentlemen.
Are you 
?
Am I a viking? Am I into pillaging? Do I like those hats? I don't get it. Someone please explain.
Anything at all.
I will answer with
How would it make you feel if I told you that hardcore gun control advocates have become murderers at this point? 
First panic. Then relief.
, and quacks like a 