Why do people boast and brag...

[Natalia Evans]

I have also seen parents brag about their newborns smiling and I know that is not even a smile, that is just muscle spasms so it makes them smile.

My daughter smiled a lot when she was just a few days old.  Even the doctors and nurses at the hospital noticed how much she smiled.

So there. 

Well my son was smiling too when he was born but I heard in a documentary about baby development that they do not smile for real and it's just muscle spasms. They don't smile for real until they are about two months old. Mine smiled for real when he was nearly two months. My husband got him to smile and it was very hard and he took a picture of it and had it made into a huge photo and had it framed. I had it as my WP avatar for a while and then had about two others of him as my avatar before I decided to stop showing my pride over him and go back to being a normal member. But I still have the custom rank my username about my pride as a mother. I just don't boast about it.


I know it's not black and white about child development and I keep taking it all so literal so it surprises me when they do it sooner or later. Then I realize, "oh every child is different so not all of them are going to be doing it at that age."

[Natalia Evans]

Really, I do not understand the pride in this stuff that is so normal and not even a mildstone.

I don't think any of us are surprised that you don't take pride in your child.  I wonder if the people raising him do.  I hope so.

I have been happy for the things he has done but I never went on Babycenter making threads about it going "Oh my son just rolled over from back to front" or "Oh my son just crawled" "Oh my son walked across the room." I told my family about it though or would post stuff on Facebook about him so my family and relatives can read it. Some may see that as a brag.

[bodie]

I always used to think all babies looked like Winston Churchill.

Then when i had my own i  thought my baby was the cutest in the world ever! 

I have always celebrated everything he has ever done,  and i always will. 
Even the teeny weeny things. 
It used to make him giggle to watch my celebration lap around the room, shouting 'wooohoooo'. 
Just lately i been going in the garden and bouncing on the
trampoline.  He laughs his socks off at this.   
Sometimes i reach for the camera and sometimes i have
posted pics on various places. 
The important thing is he knows he makes his mummy very happy 

I have never thought about if it is bragging or not.  I have now.  I couldn't give a rat's ass if anyone thinks i bragg about my cute, clever, awesome son. 


I don't know if i post too much about him, maybe i do. 



I just looked and i think i never did post ENOUGH pics of him



This was his first music festival btw



My urchin doesn't even have to do anything at all,  i am proud of him all the time and yeah i want to tell everyone.

[midlifeaspie]

Ditto to everything you just said

 

[Bastet]

I brag about my cats. They are special to me because they are mine.

[bodie]

I love to watch how happy babies get when they see their parents excited.  They are thrilled to bits.

Babies who have parents who bragg about them suffer no long term damage.  It's a one way street called 'positivity'

Whether it's a milestone or not,  whether they are truly walking or walking with some assistance, celebrating it will only give your kid more reason to repeat that behaviour.    It is all win.

(resisting the temptation to post lots of pics of my awesome kid) 

[Natalia Evans]

Here is my favorite picture of my son:




11 months here. He has changed a lot since then and looks more like a toddler.

People act like bragging about your kid is a bad thing or saying what things they have done or what mild stones they have hit but yet when others act like you not making a big deal about your kids nor talking about them a lot is also a bad thing. You can't win.

[Bastet]

Here is my favorite picture of my son:




11 months here. He has changed a lot since then and looks more like a toddler.

People act like bragging about your kid is a bad thing or saying what things they have done or what milestones they have hit but yet when others act like you not making a big deal about your kids nor talking about them a lot is also a bad thing. You can't win.

Fixed 

[Jesse]

The reason why people brag is because they want you to be jelouse

[bodie]

Awww he is well cute.

People act like bragging about your kid is a bad thing or saying what things they have done or what mild stones they have hit but yet when others act like you not making a big deal about your kids nor talking about them a lot is also a bad thing. You can't win.

Come on, you posted the first criticism  -  about parents who brag about their kids?  You must have done so knowing you would elicit this kind of response?  You must also know that your viewpoint on this is not 'typical' of most parents. 

I never used to get it.  I used to meet people i went to school with who had their kids when they were much younger than me.  I would leave them feeling baffled and wondering why on earth they felt it necessary to show me six hundred photo's of 'Johnny' as a baby, or his first xmas, or his first day at school.  (even if little 'johnny' looked like a horrid brat)  However i do totally 'get it' now.  People do dote over their kids.  It is the most amazing job in the whole world. 

 
Anyway, your little boy is gorgeous!  I would brag if he were mine. 

[Natalia Evans]

Awww he is well cute.

People act like bragging about your kid is a bad thing or saying what things they have done or what mild stones they have hit but yet when others act like you not making a big deal about your kids nor talking about them a lot is also a bad thing. You can't win.

Come on, you posted the first criticism  -  about parents who brag about their kids?  You must have done so knowing you would elicit this kind of response?  You must also know that your viewpoint on this is not 'typical' of most parents. 

I never used to get it.  I used to meet people i went to school with who had their kids when they were much younger than me.  I would leave them feeling baffled and wondering why on earth they felt it necessary to show me six hundred photo's of 'Johnny' as a baby, or his first xmas, or his first day at school.  (even if little 'johnny' looked like a horrid brat)  However i do totally 'get it' now.  People do dote over their kids.  It is the most amazing job in the whole world. 

 
Anyway, your little boy is gorgeous!  I would brag if he were mine. 

Didn't you actually read my post? I was talking about parents who brag over things like their newborns smiling or their young babies taking a step when it's about muscle spasms. To me that makes no sense. Now if a baby did a real smile, now that is something to be happy about. To brag about your kids muscle spasms would be like me bragging about how I can make my own leg move on its own when I hit the right spot on my knee. Also I know I am not the only parent with this viewpoint because I have seen women at Babycenter talking about it saying how dumb those mothers are because for one, their baby did not smile, two they are not walking like the mothers were claiming. I have seen some snarky threads about it too and women in them would make fun of those mothers and tell exaggerating stories about their little ones making it all up as a joke.

Am I really that hard to understand? Seesh. Either I am surrounded by idiots who can't read or my communication is that poor.

[bodie]

Don't you think they know it's a reflex action?  They are taking delight in whatever their baby does. 

Either I am surrounded by idiots who can't read or my communication is that poor.

You are hardly in a position to call other mothers idiots. 

[Natalia Evans]

It's not just mothers who can't seem to read what I write, it's everyone. Been frustrating because it feels like it happens to me all the time.

No I didn't know they would think they know it's muscle reflex. I would think they would say so if they knew but they sure acted like their thought their newborn was smiling for real or that their young infant was taking steps and saying they can walk even though they were just holding them and putting them on the table and making them walk. But hey I guess every parent is different so they take different pride in their kids. My mom acted so excited when I turned 13 because I was her first teenager but yet she did not act the same way about my brothers when they turned 13. I was their first child was why. Muscle spasms never excited me. Watching him grow and develop did. Seeing his mildstones did. Him having his first birthday did and him having his first Easter and opening presents. Him trying to be independent makes me feel happy and proud of him. I pretty much like everything about him except for when he screams or kicks or pinches or bites or gets into stuff but I am sure all parents have things about their kids they don't like but we all deal with it. Mine doesn't like everything about me.

[El]

Parents bragging endlessly about their kiddos can get kind of obnoxious to us non-breeders, but it's really more positive than negative the vast majority of the time- you're stuck with a crying poop machine that's totally dependent on you, so if you're happy about it and want to share the enthusiasm, at least that means you're probably in a good frame of mind to take care of your child.

That said, I've seen examples here and there of parents making ghastly choices (including, in some cases, the choice to be a parent in the first place when they absolutely should not have) and then looking to their friends and family for validation.  It sickens me.  I actively avoid being around those people because they make me so angry.

[Adam]

to be fair, once youve seen one baby, youve seen them all.