Easter is the day that Jesus rose from the dead after being buried on Good Friday. On Easter Sunday, he was resurrected, meaning that he had died and came back to life. Jesus died for our sins, for the good of mankind, he made the ultimate sacrifice to atone for our sins.
But wait, he sacrificed his life by dying, then coming back to life 2 days later? Basically what this means is that the big "ultimate sacrifice" that he made was a crappy weekend. Usually when someone sacrifices their life, they're giving up on their existence, but not Jesus, when he makes the ultimate sacrifice, he dies and then just jumps back to life like nothing ever happened. This makes me wonder how much of a sacrifice it really was. He died, which I would assume meant he went to heaven spiritually, then he came back 2 days later to retrieve his body "I left a few things back at my old place, I'll swing by there on the way to the bar".
I've often wondered if it was more that after 2 days of hanging on a cross that he fell into a coma, and since nobody knew how to check a pulse back then, it was just assumed he was dead. 2 days later, he wakes up from the coma and everybody says it's a miracle. They say that a giant boulder was rolled in front of his tomb to seal it off, and that it couldn't have been moved, how so? If the boulder was put there by humans, it shouldn't be impossible for humans to roll it out of the way. Was there a 24/7 guard on duty watching the boulder, or is it possible that maybe some of his followers went to the tomb late on Saturday night, rolled the boulder out of the way and took the body (dead or alive) leading to the idea that he just magically ascended?
Either way, thank you Jesus for making the ultimate sacrifice by having a bad weekend, we all gotta make sacrifices from time to time. I was all set to move to California to start my life over from scratch and try to make a better life for myself, but I opted to stay where I am because my grandmother's condition is getting worse by the month and my family needs the emotional support. I gave up on a dream I've had for years to try and make something of myself, but I sacrificed my ability to move to California before I turn 30 for the good of my family. This sacrifice that could affect the rest of my life is apparently nothing compared to the supreme sacrifice that the messiah made by having a crappy weekend of having to hang out at his father's place for a few days until he could go back and get the rest of his shit.
This is one of the holiest Christian holidays, the death and resurrection of their savior. The savior was killed by the "dirty jews" (of which he was one), only to come back from the dead 2 days later. The Christians celebrate this death and resurrection in the most logical way, by telling their children that a giant bunny-rabbit laid multicolored plastic eggs full of candy throughout the yard sometime late at night. And to this day, the logo of Christianity remains as the device used to kill the savior, not the crown of thorns he wore, not the cup of his blood that he gave to them, but the device used to kill him, that's what they use for a logo. If he were stabbed, would there be a big knife hanging above the altar? Would good Christian kids be getting kicked out of school because they wear a golden knife around their necks? If he were shot, would Catholics say a prayer for each bullet of the rosary?