Before you marry a person...you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.
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Quote from: bodaccea on October 29, 2011, 07:19:09 PMyes, the main tips i can give you are as follows:*foreplay is NOT two cans of lager and a bag of chips*Nipples, go easy in that area and remember you arenot trying to tune in radio Luxemburg!*Don't wipe your nob on the curtains afterwards even in my frustratingly virginous teens, i was always baffled at the "pointers" people would give me, "for when the time comes". "dont bite her pussy! they really dont like that!"i mean, wtf...why not throw in "dont punch her in the throat! dont shit on her while making out! dont try to lift her by her tits!"wtf are people doing!?
yes, the main tips i can give you are as follows:*foreplay is NOT two cans of lager and a bag of chips*Nipples, go easy in that area and remember you arenot trying to tune in radio Luxemburg!*Don't wipe your nob on the curtains afterwards
you guys are even making ME blush
even in my frustratingly virginous teens, i was always baffled at the "pointers" people would give me, "for when the time comes". "dont bite her pussy! they really dont like that!"i mean, wtf...why not throw in "dont punch her in the throat! dont shit on her while making out! dont try to lift her by her tits!"wtf are people doing!?
I'll just diagnose myself as Goddess of the Universe and have done with it. Hell with autism!
nice is just something written on biscuits.
If I had tits , I would love a guy to play the bongos on them.
Quote from: Vampire Squiddy From Hell on October 30, 2011, 06:59:36 PMIf I had tits , I would love a guy to play the bongos on them. ive said this oftenbut if i had tits, i would stay at home, fondling myself, indefinitely
it is well known that PMS Elle is evil.
I think you'd fit in a 12" or at least a 16" firework mortar
You win this thread because that's most unsettling to even think about.
