Welcome back, steadfast.
You have no idea how good or bad of a parent I was. Parenting doesn't come with a manual. Every child is different. My children never stayed with a babysitter - not even once. I was there every moment of their lives except when they were at school or at friend's houses. We never went out without taking our children with us. Even though we took our son to doctors and other professionals from the time he was three, he was not diagnosed until he was 18. If you were to ask my children if they felt neglected or abused at any time during their upbringing, they would say no. I have a loving relationship with all three of my children.
Ok, that's good. I will have to take your word for it even though I note some contradictions in your post. For example, that all of a sudden, you have a loving relationship with even your daughter whom you had no issue gossiping about here.
Remember this?
She isn't autistic; why would you think that? Autistic kids wouldn't do something like that. I know because I have one. Once my disruptive daughter left, he was so much happier and calmer. We all were.
She is a pathological liar. Everyone believes what she says because she believes it herself. Guess what she is doing now? Going to law school - the perfect career for her!
How did she learn to become a pathological liar and such an unbearable disgrace to you and the family?
I wasn't implying that autism was your parent's fault. I was trying to emphasize that my daughter's behavior was not my fault either. Making a blanket statement that parents are completely responsible for the mistakes their children make is just wrong.
You consider them just mistakes? What your daughter's doing is more than just mistakes. This isn't about the challenges of having an autistic son/daughter. Your daughter, according to you, has (at least) abandoned her own daughter for her boyfriend. That's not a simple child mistake. That's a lack of responsibility for one's actions and a lack of sacrificial love for her own child.
Again, why did she end up that way? I believe in cause and effect in most cases. You?
Until you have been a parent, you have no idea what you are talking about. Nearly all teenagers rebel against their parents. I don't know if many autistic children do this - my son didn't rebel. But for most it is part of growing up.
Actually, I do know at least quite a bit what I'm talking about. I was, and still am, sort of a "parent" for my little sister (in the absence of her emotionally absent and abusive father). And, for the record, neither I nor any of my siblings (including my sister) - none of them are autistic like me - have ever rebelled as teenagers against our parents with the same degree your daughter has.
No, rebellion is not necessarily part of growing up. At least not in the sense that you seem to be arguing for.
Very few families go through the teenage years without having difficulties. Doing the exact opposite of what your parents want is part of that rebellion. The more the parent tries to control her child during this stage, the more they will rebel. Teenagers often make poor choices during this stage because they aren't mature enough to think about the consequences. They don't believe that their parents are trying to protect and help them.
So your daughter's still a teenager (or maybe now a young adult) and, yet, you were shitting on her (your own kid) publicly in this forum. So if teenagers have an excuse for their poor choices, what's your excuse for your poor choices? Being a teenager?
Have you noticed that you aren't willing to take any bit of responsibility whatsoever for your daughter's behavior. So your young daughter's a selfish brat because it's all her fault for being a selfish brat, right?
I wasn't easy to deal with when I was a teenager either.
Thanks for letting me know.
I love my kids with all my heart and I did the best I could in raising them. All three of them are on their way to being productive members of society and all three love me back.
You're right. I saw the love you have for your daughter in your beautifully sweet motherly posts.
I would have liked to ask people on this forum for advice on dealing with certain issues regarding my autistic son, but I guess I won't because you would interpret it as talking about his back.
You came here for advice or to express your frustrations? If you're seeking advice, just ask. I'm sure many members here will help you out.
I figured that as autistic people, you might have some insight that might help him, but never mind, I will find some parenting forum instead.
And yet your first post was about your non-autistic daughter not your son. It's like you came here to show your frustrations with your daughter and to get some vengeful pleasure gossiping about her as much as you came here to gossip about your autistic son. So why not just admit that you enjoy mentioning humiliating things about your kids in public?
In my life I have said some things I have regretted. I regret the comment about autistics being annoying. No one is perfect. No matter how old I get, it seems that every so often I say something I shouldn't have said. The thing is I still remember the things I said at age 13 that I regret. I can't forget them and they continue to bother me.
It's good that you regret making that comment about autistics being annoying (regardless of the reason for your regret) because it came from a parent of an autistic son, that parent posting such a comment in a public forum full of other autistics. It came off as disrespectful of the autistic members here (and of your own son) that there's a reason why a couple here have considered you to be a troll. As a mother who supposedly loves her autistic son, it doesn't make much sense that you would say that.
I want to tell you about something heartless I said once, because I really didn't know it was heartless. Before I ever had children, I learned that someone at work was sad because his wife had just had a miscarriage. I said at least they have other children and they can always have another. Having never gone through pregnancy, I didn't understand how they felt.
You're right. That was pretty heartless. I wouldn't have said such a thing myself. Did you apologize to them for that?
What you said about my parenting skills was both heartless and uninformed. If you ever have children, you will understand. Maybe you won't regret your comment. You probably won't even remember you said it. But you will feel just as hurt as I do when someone says that about you.
Ok, then. Tell me how you would feel if your autistic son who can be very annoying and your pathological liar of a daughter ever saw your posts here. I'm sure you and they would have happier days together as a result.
