If you've talked to that many trans people, then you should have some idea of how rude it is to fixate on what's in someone's pants.
Yes. And that is why I clarified
here that it is entirely irrelevant. Transsexuals are fundamentally different from any other minority group in the way they seek acceptance. Gay people seek acceptance by being acknowledged as who they truly are, and to not be judged for it. Transsexuals on the other hand demand acceptance by being
not acknowledged as what they are, but instead as what they perceive themselves to be. Here is the very important difference: They require ignorance.
No one really cares about word definitions, that is what 'woman' can mean and what 'men' can mean or whatever gender is. People care about reality, and the reality is that they were born of one sex and have all the properties of that sex but then develop the notion that their
social image or whatever personality is of the other sex. And the reality is, that sex and gender is not spiritual or self-chosen or self-perceived, but that the many factors that make you male or female in a way that actually matters to the outside observer rely on genetics, hormones and how that shapes your neurological makeup. And that might not be as apparent to both normal people and transsexuals, but those factors and many fine details determine our emotional realities and the outcomes of social interaction.
So here is where transsexual 'acceptance' fails entirely. You can ignore reality, as long as it doesn't matter much. That is you can interact with people socially as if they were manly women or girly males and not talk to them about your perception about them, or even lie to them to make them happy. After all, they aren't that important and it may be only superficial. But you can't ignore it once it truly matters. When it comes to sexuality and any deeper kind of relationship, you don't have a choice to act by your most accurate perception of reality, rather than the socially preferable one.
And that is only the tip of the iceberg of the inconsistencies that acceptance by ignorance causes. There are many fine details to how women react and feel and men react and feel differently that help us to react appropriately and in respect to the other person, but which are at best only roughly conforming in transsexuals. Deceive (look like you are something you aren't on the superficial outside, hide what is actually the case), Inveigle (make people engage on your misrepresented circumstances), Obfuscate (redefine the meaning of words such that identification is less likely, invent new social conventions to remain hidden, deny any approach towards the misfit circumstances under the disguise of discrimination and offense). Those are the tactics of criminals, not minorities. Why not say "I am male, but I always felt like a woman"
that is me, I want to be accepted.
Why all this stupid mess? Do Moslem immigrants hide their religion and visit Christian churches? Do they claim with insistence that religion isn't really that important and that what's in someone's belief system is none of your business? Do they try to redefine the meaning of 'religion' so that it doesn't apply to them or makes them Christian? Do they do face surgery in order to hide their heritage and religious background?
If they did, how would that look like?
MtF women are not normal women and Muslems aren't Christians, although both are religious. What someone believes does matter the same way their sex does. Ignorance is always wrong. It has nothing to do with real acceptance. At best it only shows that you just want to get your way and avoid dealing with everything else.
It is not societies fault if you were born male but think that you are female. Of course, it causes problems and things that are emotionally difficult for you. Acceptance doesn't mean that all of your problems are simply shifted towards other people's responsibilities. Acceptance simply means that you are acknowledged and respected as who you actually are (and not as whatever you believe yourself to be).