OK.....(breathe in )
So one of my team leaders is a fucking evangelical Christian. Worst still, she is a newly ordained minister.
Those of you who do not know, I live in Australia, pretty casual place in terms of religion. a year ago, the person at the reins was an Atheist and not a secretive Atheist. Australia being Australia was saying "So what she is a fucking hopeless PM regardless of her religious affiliation and her gender, vote her out". I ddi not think too much of Julia Gillard but a few aspects to her drew my vote and one of them was her bravery to put out her lac of religious conviction.
OK I know this is in a pubic space but my Mother died two years or so ago . I do not morn her passing as such, in as much as I think of the excruciating time she had been development of her cancer an hr death as being horrendous and sad and unfair. What would have surely otherwise been a fit 62 year old 4'11" pocket rocket, health eating, non-smoking, non-drinking lady be murdered by Cancer.
The problem is that .....surprisingly when I talk with this lady of the church when she talk of my remaining Parent, she thinks i should risk my children's safety by letting him know where I live and invite him into my life.
Last two times I saw this man, I punched him out.
That was 15 years ago. he is now 64 and 3000 kms away.
She was quite convinced that the moral imperative was that I should make contact and work towards the end of renewing relationship with him.
I say "Fuck that sideways in the arse" BUT what do you guys think?
She forgot one thing.
Forgiving can be a great thing, to help people getting along further in life, when they have to be in each other's way. but it never comes for free.
Why should you forgive a bastard, who wrecked more than he will ever be aware of, if he does not even realise what he did, or wants to be accountable for what he did.
That teamleader of yours is a moron. Forgiveness does not work that way.
It's a trick often seen in evangelical groups (not evangelical in the sense of Lutheran). Forgive, the holy ghost will make everything better, and all will be healed. It's bullshit. Forgiveness does not take away accountability.
Tell her to read her bible better. It is good to break with what is really bad and dangerous in ones life.
Your first task is keeping your kids safe. And you are doing that, despite the father you had. That teamleader of yours should be grateful, and should be thanking the goddess on her bare knees, that she is allowed to see a miracle in real life, when seeing you.
Fun fact. Evangelicals like to work on emotions. She will probably see your being uneasy when she starts nagging you as a sign of how she is reading your emotional needs well. Maybe next time you see her, and she starts trying to get at you again, that thought might make you laugh. Evangelicals can be easy to confuse, if you don't play the emotions game to their rules. Could be fun.