Damn, that's good advice.
Dear Mary: I try to save some money out of every paycheck but life happens and I spend whatever is necessary on whatever emergency arises. My problem is that if there is any money left over, I feel compelled to spend it on myself. All of the arguments my husband and I have are over money. Because I make more than he does, he thinks I should pay all of the bills. I’m resentful, which also makes me want to spend money.
Please do not suggest that I talk to my husband because if we start talking about money we will end up in a huge fight, and I give him the silent treatment for days. I am embarrassed about my behavior concerning money but I do not know how to change, especially when I do not have any support from my husband. I am seriously considering a divorce. —Jo, Tennessee
Dear Jo: If I am not allowed to suggest that you talk to your husband, let me just go ahead and suggest that you divorce him now. That’s going to happen anyway, so why drag it out?
There is no help for someone like you who has her mind made up and her heels dug in, insisting that she will not do the very thing she knows that she must.