Educational

Author Topic: An apology to Richard  (Read 1725 times)

0 Members and 6 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Loupgarou

  • Tormented Werewolf of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Intense Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 878
  • Karma: 98
  • Gender: Female
  • Friendly Recluse
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #60 on: October 01, 2010, 03:15:55 PM »
I do find that your more extreme personality traits become more apparent when you're online, along with being social. The lack of social cues online really is a factor.

Mr Schledge I totally agree with the social cues bit. Strangely, I realised that I actually rely more on tone of voice than I thought I did, as I still miss the mark with facial expression and body language occasionally(more than occasionally actually). I have often gotten in to hot water, not intending to, by the lack of tone of voice. And even smileys elude me generally.

I try to be very, very careful. But it can be distressing working this hard. That is why I like to get to know people online as quickly as possible, so I don't fuck up too badly. I am very "dry" at times online, as well as in IRL, but the people that know me, don't get weird about it.  ;)

Loup
"Long-winded speech is exhausting. Better to stay centered". - Lao Tzu

Offline 'Butterflies'

  • Mastermind of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7500
  • Karma: 625
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #61 on: October 01, 2010, 03:19:19 PM »
Anonymity is an illusion when using this kind of technology. If you would not say it / do it / feel it IRL, best not to do it at all.

Even on the internet, we still have to live with our actions/consequences.

That is what I tell my son.

Loup

(Butterflies, my dad met my stepmum in online dating and they have been married for 6 years now. They are very happy. Just be very, very aware. :indeed:)

That's pretty cool. I've read success stories on the dating sites, but I've always just assumed them to be BS. I've never actually known of anybody who's had a marriage from an internet dating site. My best friend, who lives with me is hassling me to go on a dating site to meet guys. She says she'd go with me to make sureeverything goes OK. She still thinks I'm straight though :). Obviously I don't want to meet guys.
I want to do it to meet girls but my aunt and uncle have warned me off doing that. Given my limited social life, and the small town mentallity of the place I live, the chances of meeting a gay woman in real life who's single and with whom there's a mutual attraction seems at best remote.
I think my only realistic chance of having a relationship is probably through the internet, but the thought of doing it scares the crap out of me, and it means going against my family. One day I'll probably pluck up the courage to do it though :viking:

Offline 'Butterflies'

  • Mastermind of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7500
  • Karma: 625
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #62 on: October 01, 2010, 03:25:25 PM »
I do find that your more extreme personality traits become more apparent when you're online, along with being social. The lack of social cues online really is a factor.

I find being social on the net far easier than real life. I probably appear almost passable socially on the internet. IRL I just go to pieces if someone I don't know tries to speak to me.

Offline Natalia Evans

  • Spokane Tour Guide of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8148
  • Karma: 578
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #63 on: October 01, 2010, 03:44:05 PM »
I met my husband from a forum. Not really a dating site because I met him from a forum instead. I guess that be BS.  :LOL:


Offline 'Butterflies'

  • Mastermind of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7500
  • Karma: 625
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #64 on: October 01, 2010, 04:00:43 PM »
I met my husband from a forum. Not really a dating site because I met him from a forum instead. I guess that be BS.  :LOL:



No. If you say you met your hubby through a forum then I believe you and wouldn't say it's BS. What I meant was when I read the testamonials on any dating site I don't really know if they're real stories or just the site making up BS to try and persuade people to use their site.

Offline Adam

  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 24530
  • Karma: 1260
  • Gender: Male
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #65 on: October 01, 2010, 04:02:50 PM »
I find it easier online. I think I can be normal online. IRL i come across as shy and boring. And maybe a bit thick.

Bint has met me irl though and she said I talk fine. I have a weird voice though

Offline 'Butterflies'

  • Mastermind of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7500
  • Karma: 625
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #66 on: October 01, 2010, 04:10:51 PM »
I find it easier online. I think I can be normal online. IRL i come across as shy and boring. And maybe a bit thick.

So do I. Exept I come across as more than a bit thick. I seem to appear subnormal. I have a habit of saying stupid sarcastic things that I think are funny, and then everyone assuming I was serious and that I'm just really thick. I've done it once or twice online here recently aswell :-[

Offline Natalia Evans

  • Spokane Tour Guide of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 8148
  • Karma: 578
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #67 on: October 01, 2010, 04:12:00 PM »
I met my husband from a forum. Not really a dating site because I met him from a forum instead. I guess that be BS.  :LOL:



No. If you say you met your hubby through a forum then I believe you and wouldn't say it's BS. What I meant was when I read the testamonials on any dating site I don't really know if they're real stories or just the site making up BS to try and persuade people to use their site.

Ah I see. Those advertising stories, not personal ones.

Offline 'Butterflies'

  • Mastermind of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Obsessive Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 7500
  • Karma: 625
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #68 on: October 01, 2010, 04:23:40 PM »
I met my husband from a forum. Not really a dating site because I met him from a forum instead. I guess that be BS.  :LOL:



No. If you say you met your hubby through a forum then I believe you and wouldn't say it's BS. What I meant was when I read the testamonials on any dating site I don't really know if they're real stories or just the site making up BS to try and persuade people to use their site.

Ah I see. Those advertising stories, not personal ones.

Yeah. It would be a bit stupid of me to call people liars because they say they met their partner over the net. I doubt if anyone would lie about that.
It's the same when I read agony aunt columns. I'm never sure if it's real people with problems, or if the agony aunt has just made up questions so that they've got something interesting to write about.

Osensitive1

  • Guest
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #69 on: October 01, 2010, 04:30:16 PM »
I do find that your more extreme personality traits become more apparent when you're online, along with being social. The lack of social cues online really is a factor.
Yes, the lack of cues as well as time to think before response makes a big difference.

The_Chosen_One

  • Guest
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #70 on: October 01, 2010, 04:52:42 PM »
I met my partner through a work intranet board, and we have been together for about 10 years. Took us awhile to get together, as we both live on the other side of the country.

IRL I'm probably not much different to here.

Offline RageBeoulve

  • Super sand nigger
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 16783
  • Karma: 927
  • Gender: Male
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #71 on: October 01, 2010, 08:43:45 PM »
I'm the same online as I am offline, I think. I don't hide shit. Well... any more than I do offline. :green:
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline Al Swearegen

  • Pussycat of the Aspie Elite
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 18721
  • Karma: 2240
  • Always front on and in your face
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #72 on: October 01, 2010, 09:52:21 PM »
I met my partner through a work intranet board, and we have been together for about 10 years. Took us awhile to get together, as we both live on the other side of the country.

IRL I'm probably not much different to here.

She is gorgeous too mate. Tell her i SAY "Hi"
I2 today is not i2 of yesteryear. It is a knitting circle. Those that participate be they nice or asshats know their place and the price to be there. Odeon is the overlord

.Benevolent if you toe the line.

Think it is I2 of old? Even Odeon is not so delusional as to think otherwise. He may on occasionally pretend otherwise but his base is that knitting circle.

Censoring/banning/restricting/moderating myself, Calanadale & Scrapheap were all not his finest moments.

How to apologise to Scrap

Offline renaeden

  • Complicated Case of the Aspie Elite
  • Caretaker Admin
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 25805
  • Karma: 2521
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #73 on: October 01, 2010, 10:03:04 PM »
I met GalileoAce on the internet. We had a disagreement about Star Trek. Then we got to know each other and I travelled across to Melbourne to meet him and we had a great time.


Those are some good points that you posted, Kit. :plus:
Mildly Cute in a Retarded Way
Tek'ma'tae

Offline Queen Victoria

  • Ruler of Aspie Universe
  • Elder
  • Almighty Postwhore
  • *****
  • Posts: 28244
  • Karma: 2805
  • Gender: Female
Re: An apology to Richard
« Reply #74 on: October 01, 2010, 10:38:12 PM »
I started out apologizing to Richard and this thread got turned into a matchmaking service.  Sheesh.
A good monarch is a treasure. A good politician is an oxymoron.

My brain is both uninhibited and uninhabited.

:qv: