YOU WILL ALL DIE
Fool, I am immortal! Prepare for your fluffalization at the hands of The Holy Broken Chair of Fluffiness, the one true deity, and the purest source of fluffiness in all of existance! Soon, you, like many others have, will feel its touch, and be reduced to a mere puff of exceptionally fluffy dust! MWAHHAHahAHHAhHahHAhHaHHAHAHHAHAAA1!!!111!
[/RPG villain emulation mode]