Discuss GalileoAce

[Adam]

hormones often change the person's sexuality after a sex change

[odeon]

Ultimately, if you aren't happy with what you are, you won't be able to make those around you happy, either. And just as importantly, we are all selfish, first and foremost. You, me, GA, everyone.

I admit that I am selfish, however I won't ruin a relationship just to get my own way. Emma loves me for who I am, changing my sex would disturb her as she's not particularly into that thing. In other words, If I change sex then I'm subtley forcing her to accept something that she doesn't want.

I very much doubt GA would ruin his marriage just to get things his way. I also suspect he didn't knowingly deceive her or anything--it's just something that grew over time and was more and more difficult to ignore. Hell, the setting itself, marriage, might have set it off.

That you wouldn't do something like it only tells us that you don't know what he is going through but are willing to judge him anyway. It is conceivable that things become less black and white in a few years' time.

(Incidentally I don't know what it's like, either, but I'm not as uick to judge as you are.)

You are one of the last persons I'd expect to attack GA from a seemingly altruistic point of view and I don't buy it. You are trying to provoke, as simple as that.

I am only telling him what I honestly think. Trying to change yourself to become happy usually is a neverending upward spiral that to me is more difficult in the long run than accept for who you are.

In my opinion, wasting money to change your appearance is pretty much silly. That money could be spent on far more useful and functional things.

In your opinion.

[El]

Ultimately, if you aren't happy with what you are, you won't be able to make those around you happy, either. And just as importantly, we are all selfish, first and foremost. You, me, GA, everyone.

I admit that I am selfish, however I won't ruin a relationship just to get my own way. Emma loves me for who I am, changing my sex would disturb her as she's not particularly into that thing. In other words, If I change sex then I'm subtley forcing her to accept something that she doesn't want.

I very much doubt GA would ruin his marriage just to get things his way. I also suspect he didn't knowingly deceive her or anything--it's just something that grew over time and was more and more difficult to ignore. Hell, the setting itself, marriage, might have set it off.

That you wouldn't do something like it only tells us that you don't know what he is going through but are willing to judge him anyway. It is conceivable that things become less black and white in a few years' time.

(Incidentally I don't know what it's like, either, but I'm not as uick to judge as you are.)

Some of the things GA has done in his marriage (that I've heard of) have been rather douchey, but the sex change thing is IMO an issue of unfortunate self-realization.

[odeon]

Ultimately, if you aren't happy with what you are, you won't be able to make those around you happy, either. And just as importantly, we are all selfish, first and foremost. You, me, GA, everyone.

I admit that I am selfish, however I won't ruin a relationship just to get my own way. Emma loves me for who I am, changing my sex would disturb her as she's not particularly into that thing. In other words, If I change sex then I'm subtley forcing her to accept something that she doesn't want.

I very much doubt GA would ruin his marriage just to get things his way. I also suspect he didn't knowingly deceive her or anything--it's just something that grew over time and was more and more difficult to ignore. Hell, the setting itself, marriage, might have set it off.

That you wouldn't do something like it only tells us that you don't know what he is going through but are willing to judge him anyway. It is conceivable that things become less black and white in a few years' time.

(Incidentally I don't know what it's like, either, but I'm not as uick to judge as you are.)

Some of the things GA has done in his marriage (that I've heard of) have been rather douchey, but the sex change thing is IMO an issue of unfortunate self-realization.

That's what I think, too.

[GalileoAce]

how have reactions to your  being trans been irl btw? do you get comments off people when you go out or are you not openly trans in public?

I'm now more out in public. Not to everyone mind you. But a few key select people. And their reactions are generally positive and supportive. I haven't gotten any negative responses beyond maybe one or two people just brushing it aside.

I guess it's hard to be negative in person...Well at least for tactful non-autistic people

I'm panromantic, heteroattracted asexual (if you go by my current body, homoattracted if you use my gender). But it's also possible that I'm only asexual because of body dysphoria. It's not the right body so I can't fathom having sex with it.
But even then...I don't think sex would ever be a big deal to me.
As a girl I'm gay and I doubt that will change, but I am open to the possibility of also being attracted to some men. I don't know how likely that is, but hopes it's not likely. But I'm still open minded.

I wondered the same thing since you came out as trans.  It surprises me that you don't know, either, though I suppose you have know way of knowing until you actually have made the change to the degree of completion that you want to.

What do you mean?

I guess I was surprised that you didn't feel more certain about how your being asexual relates to your being trans, but then realized you coudln't be 100% sure until you changed your body to whatever degree of completion you're aiming for (I forget what that is and can't be arsed to look it up- I thought for awhile you weren't even going on hormones, but that's changed now, so I decided not to make assumptions).

Whilst I can have a (non-sexual) relationship with anyone of any gender, I'm normally attracted only to girls, or female-type people. Except recently, I've been able to "appreciate" how some guys appear. So..that's different.

I admit that I am selfish, however I won't ruin a relationship just to get my own way. Emma loves me for who I am, changing my sex would disturb her as she's not particularly into that thing. In other words, If I change sex then I'm subtley forcing her to accept something that she doesn't want.

If she loves you for who you are then it wouldn't matter if you changed sex. You'd still be you. And if you did want to change and you knew she couldn't handle it so you decide not to, isn't she subtly forcing you to accept something you don't want?

In my opinion, wasting money to change your appearance is pretty much silly. That money could be spent on far more useful and functional things.

Have you ever had a haircut? Bought some fancy new clothes?

I'm still wondering how the hell GA would afford much more than GA is currently doing.

What do you mean?

But changing your sex *is* pretending to be something you're not. He was born a male and should accept who he is. Trying to be female won't make a difference for him, apart from fufill his own selfish needs. Personally I don't identify with a lot of males myself, but I feel no need to change sex because of that.

The same thing could be said for a lot of things - AS for example. A lot of us have it, but live with it - trying to fight it or change it won't do anything.

You're argument is flawed. If we shouldn't try to fight AS, then why should I fight GID? I have a desire, innate, in built, to be female. To be treated as female. Should I just accept this, who I am? Or should I fight it? And who except what I was born with?

Yes, it must be extremely hard for Ren. Will be hard for GA too, but, GA is the one in control here. And Ren isn't. That is theirs to deal with. And yes, it would probably have been convenient had GA realised sooner. But how is hindsight wisdom going to help. Doesn't change a thing in the present.

It was the hardest decision I've ever had to make. And yes I'm the cause of massive instability in renaeden's life. I feel like shit. Like the worst person.

But how can I expect her to love me, if I don't? How can I expect anyone to love me, if I don't love myself?

The problem isn't that they were born as the "wrong" gender. I know a person who was pretty masculine but then "changed" gender through surgery. Now "she" is looking for girls(!)

Every She is allowed to be a lesbian.

Of course. I just find it peculiar that a male would like to  be surgically changed into a female to become it.

Transgenderism/Transsexualism has nothing to do with sexuality.

Some of the things GA has done in his marriage (that I've heard of) have been rather douchey, but the sex change thing is IMO an issue of unfortunate self-realization.

Such as?

[Parts]

Good luck too you so much elective surgery would drive me nuts

[GalileoAce]

Good luck too you so much elective surgery would drive me nuts

That's a long way off. I'll stick to hormones for now

[Parts]

Good luck too you so much elective surgery would drive me nuts

That's a long way off. I'll stick to hormones for now

I would dwell on it constantly you must have better will power than I

[GalileoAce]

Good luck too you so much elective surgery would drive me nuts

That's a long way off. I'll stick to hormones for now

I would dwell on it constantly you must have better will power than I

Well I haven't made that decision concrete. To me it's still a nebulous thing several years from now. And the only reason I want to do it is to change the gender marker on my birth certificate. If I could do that with out SRS I probably wouldn't bother. It's not like I need the plumbing; I don't have sex. I have no special enmity toward my male plumbing *shrugs*

[Alex179]

I never think about my birth certificate.   

You were born with male genitalia lol.   You would have to go back in time and change your sex right there to make your actual birth certificate (the one that was made at the time you were actually born) say that you are a female.    I guess they would make you a new birth certificate that says your "gender" is female when you could officially be declared due to your sex change.   That still isn't your real birth certificate, it is the one they would be making for you after the fact to accommodate for your sex change.   You are trying to make your sex match what you see as your gender role (because gender is all about perception socially, right?).

You are taking hormones and considering surgery because of your birth certificate?   Seriously.

[Eclair]

The problem isn't that they were born as the "wrong" gender. I know a person who was pretty masculine but then "changed" gender through surgery. Now "she" is looking for girls(!)

Every She is allowed to be a lesbian.

Of course. I just find it peculiar that a male would like to  be surgically changed into a female to become it.

I find it peculiar that people would want to play with shit when they fuck.

[TheoK]

 

[Eclair]

Last year s/he fucked guys. Had some strange ideas about that too though. Only fucked with straight guys, no bisexuals or gays. They weren't "to be trusted". And this I've heard from many transvestites and transsexuals: they just want to fuck straight guys.

Now, that is weird indeed.

As weird as some men only wanting to have sex with virgins.

Makes no sense at all.

I think the obsession with straight guys is somehow being the guy who 'turned them' into being gay.

[GalileoAce]

I never think about my birth certificate.

I imagine few people would. I figure Norrie, in Sydney, is constantly thinking about it.

You were born with male genitalia lol.

Oh yes. Haha. Quite funny. A universal joke if you will.  

You would have to go back in time and change your sex right there to make your actual birth certificate (the one that was made at the time you were actually born) say that you are a female.    I guess they would make you a new birth certificate that says your "gender" is female when you could officially be declared due to your sex change.   That still isn't your real birth certificate, it is the one they would be making for you after the fact to accommodate for your sex change.

I aim to change my officially registered sex/gender on my officially registered birth certificate.

Either via this or this.

You are trying to make your sex match what you see as your gender role (because gender is all about perception socially, right?).

No. I do not see it that way.

You are taking hormones and considering surgery because of your birth certificate?   Seriously.

No.
I am considering surgery primarily for the birth certificate, it is important that I legally been seen as female. But it's not the only reason I would consider surgery.

And I'm taking hormones to have as close to a physical female body as is medically possible.

[Eclair]

Some of the things GA has done in his marriage (that I've heard of) have been rather douchey, but the sex change thing is IMO an issue of unfortunate self-realization.

I can't comment specifically, but it would make sense if someone was struggling with an inner frustration about their gender (or something equally as significant) to take that out in other ways. I'm sure we've all done it.

Also, GA had thought those feelings had been pushed down. Struggling with inner demons, probably feeling unable to broach the subject with Ren until 'he' felt sure that it was unavoidable would be another strain. That would cause a lot of frustration and anxiety, which of course impacts on close relationships, regardless of the issue.